


Prayer to Persephone

by I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon



Category: Feverwake - Victoria Lee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mythology, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Child Abuse, Eating Disorders, Explicit Sexual Content, Falling In Love, Flowers, Fluff, Grooming, I warn for every chapter too so read those, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Past Suicide Attempt, Rape, References to Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, So much angst, Victim Blaming, its not cute, please read the tags, to clarify the dara/ Gordon Ames and Lehrer are the in the same context as the books
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:33:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 67,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24092140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon/pseuds/I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon
Summary: In which Dara is Persephone and Noam isn't quite Hades but they fall in love anyway.
Relationships: Adalwolf Lehrer/Raphael | Benjamin Malley, Ames and bethany is more of a pre relationship, Carter Ames/Bethany Glennis, Dara Shirazi/Calix Lehrer, Dara Shirazi/Gordon Ames, Dara Shirazi/Noam Alvaro
Comments: 42
Kudos: 56





	1. Prayer to Persephone

**Author's Note:**

> Me: I'm not gonna write dara's pov because he is too smart and poetic for me.  
> Also me: write an entire multi chapter fic from his pov coward.
> 
> I love greek mythology I love feverwake. That's the explanation for this thing.  
> (This is also an excuse to school people in mythology and history, I'm not sorry.)  
> Title is from the poem Prayer to Persephone by Edna St. Vincent Millay.
> 
> I'm going to be honest with you, I ramble a lot in the end notes, also explain a lot and share any new things I may have learned about Ancient Greece. If you need any more explanation just ask. I know a lot about mythology and am not very good at gauging the average knowledge of a person about this subject so I may gloss over things that are unfamiliar to some readers.
> 
> Zeus: Lehrer (ofc)  
> Persephone: Dara  
> Hades: Harold Sascha  
> Poseidon: General Ames  
> Aphrodite: Bethany  
> Ares: the good Ames  
> Athena: Taye  
> Dionysus: Leo (Im not sure how much he will be there tho)  
> Praxidice/dice: Noam  
> Adalwolf: Helios  
> Raphael: Apollo. (They just appeared idk what happened)
> 
> Praxidice is the greek goddess of judicial punishment and the extractor of vengeance. Which I feel is a match with Noam in the first book.  
> dice: goddess of justice.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which everything is terrible.  
> Please read the warnings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to make it nice but then I reread 'a familiar disappointment' by hapan and now it's sad.  
> Warnings for this chapter:
> 
> LEHRER  
> Implied past suicide attempt  
> Implied eating disorder  
> Self harm (By starving)  
> non- consensual touching  
> Off screen rape  
> implied physical abuse  
> Slight on screen physical abuse  
> A couple of plants get murdered I guess

Dara was bored

So bored he might just die. He didn't think his kind had died of boredom before but he was absolutely certain that it was happening to him. He hadn't been allowed off Olympus in a week. Gods, he hadn't even been allowed to leave Lehrer's quarters. He preferred being alone over Lehrer's company, of course but there were only so many times one could read the same books in a day. He had tried composing poetry but the words didn't come. He couldn't think of anything to draw and weaving was guaranteed to end in a disaster without Taye there to help him. He would have tried his hand at pottery again but clay was no longer permitted over the threshold of Lehrer's chambers after Dara had, frustrated after hours of not getting anything right, flung all of the wet, misshapen atrocities he had managed to create against the marble wall of the sitting room in a fit of unthinking rage. The look on Lehrer's face had almost been worth the beating it had earned him. 

Dara had been growing flowers for the last hour. As much as he tried the only things he had managed were burdocks and yellow carnations. He crushed the last flower in his fist, the delicate petals tearing easily. He sighed and wiped his hand clean on the couch. A petty gesture, but it made him feel slightly better. He cast a look at the other rejects on the floor, flicking them into the hearth with an absentminded gesture. Maybe, he thought darkly, I'll be allowed to leave the quarters if I set them on fire. He discarded the thought as soon as it had sprung up. The best case scenario was that Lehrer didn't care. The more likely scenario was that he would be furious. He didn't like it when other people destroyed his things. He had proven that plenty of times. Besides, attempting to destroy Lehrer's possessions was what had gotten him locked up here in the first place. Dara trailed a finger over the inside of his arm. 

No, better wait it out. If he was lucky Lehrer would find a week enough time to remind Dara of who owned him. If Dara was very lucky Lehrer had no desire to remind him of it through ways other than restricting his movement.

Anymore. 

His ears picked up the sound of footsteps coming his way. He contemplated moving to his own chambers but decided against it. Lehrer would expect him to leave them to greet him anyway. Or come find him eventually. Better to get this over with. He stood up from his lounging position, not wanting to endure the vulnerability of lying down with Lehrer in the room more than he already had to.

The doors opened by themselves. The powers which had kept them closed bending briefly for their king. Lehrer stepped through the door, serene as always. Wolf at his heels. His colourless eyes surveyed the room before they fell on Dara, who tensed under the weight of his gaze. His mouth quirked up in a calm smile as he stepped closer, looming over Dara, impossibly tall. He raised his hand and despite his best efforts Dara flinched. Lehrer let out a soft laugh but didn't stop his movements until he was cupping Dara's cheek. "Did you behave, flower?"

Dara took a moment to make sure his voice didn't shake. "Nothing is broken is it?" he bit out. He took a little comfort in the fact that he sounded steady.

"No need to flinch then, hm?" Lehrer's smile hadn't wavered. He let go of Dara's face and breathing became a little easier. Suddenly his hand shot out to grab Dara's arm. Nails cutting his flesh easily. Dara barely managed to swallow his cry of surprise. The blood welling up in the cuts was a dark, rusted gold. Lehrer's mouth discarded the smile. He didn't have any expression on his face, but his dissatisfaction was palpable in the air. "You haven't eaten yet."

Dara said nothing.

"Let us rectify that," his voice was mild but it still made Dara shiver. He turned to walk to the dining room, not checking if Dara followed him. There were no other options. Ambrosia, fruits and nuts were waiting on the low table. Lehrer was already waiting next to one of the couches. Dara took the hint and sat down, staring at the food elegantly assembled on plates. He felt Lehrer's fingers under his chin, forcing him to look at those coldly amused eyes. "I was hoping this wasn't necessary anymore. You are not an infant after all. Eating to keep yourself alive shouldn't be too much to ask."

"It's not necessary. I can do it myself."

But Lehrer was already shaking his head. "No, flower. You had your chance." He turned to pick up the bowl full of ambrosia, dipping his fingers in the thick liquid and holding them in front of Dara's mouth. "Now, eat."

Dara recoiled, shaking his head. "No, I can do it myself."

Lehrer's gaze had turned to frost at the word no. "You can, you didn't. Now. Eat."

"Sir, your majesty-"

"Dara, you know better than to test my patience." His voice was pleasant, like they were discussing their day, like he wasn't asking his own child to lick his fingers clean. Some of the ambrosia dripped off Lehrer's fingers and onto Dara's naked thigh. He took a shuddering breath, desperately trying to fight down the nausea that was climbing up his throat like ivy. He leaned forward, closing his eyes as he wrapped his lips around Lehrer's fingers to suck the food of the digits.

It tasted like blood. 

Lehrer had scooped up more of the liquid. "Again." His voice had become lower. When Dara dared to glance at his eyes they had gone sharp. He knew there was no escaping this, escaping him. He focussed on getting the food down as fast as possible. Desperately trying to think of a way to make it visually less enticing. Knowing that Lehrer would use this as an excuse, use it to blame him for what he subjected him to-

"Almost done, my dear." Lehrer's voice could be called kind if Dara didn't know him well enough to hear the pleasure crawling through every note. He suppressed the sudden urge to bite and quickly swallowed another mouthful. Seeing that the bowl was empty, he quickly stood up. 

"I'm done. Can I retire now?" his voice was trembling, as were his legs.

"Not so fast, Dara. Didn't I teach you to always clean up after yourself?" He pinned Dara down with his gaze. Still holding his hand in front of Dara's nose.

He broke. "Please."

But Lehrer had no mercy for him today. Merely moving his hand closer so he was smearing leftover ambrosia on Dara's lips.

"Pl-" he was interrupted by Lehrer shoving his fingers in his mouth roughly. He made a choking noise trying to wrench his head backward but was stopped by Lehrer's other hand fisting in his hair.

"Should have just eaten it yourself." His tone was soft and mocking. "I wouldn't have to do this if you listened. Eating is hardly a difficult thing to accomplish. I hadn't expected it to be too much to ask but alas," he sighed. Sliding his fingers in and out of Dara's mouth with practiced movements. Other hand petting Dara's curls. After pressing down hard on Dara's tongue once he finally retreated. Cleaning his hand in the bowl of rosewater that was standing next to the food. "You may go," he made a vague gesture with his other hand. Dara turned to walk to his room. He had barely managed one step before Lehrer was suddenly right behind him. He didn't say anything just swiped his finger over Dara's thigh. Not bringing it to Dara's mouth but his own. He let out a low, satisfied hum as he licked it clean before moving back to his own food. 

Dara knew a dismissal when he saw one.

He moved to his room quickly. Closing the door, wishing he had a lock. He crawled onto his bed, shaking under a pile of pillows and silks. Waiting. Lehrer was still in the dining room but it was only a matter of time before he came for Dara again. The sheet brushing up against him reminded him of the cuts on his arm, he turned his head to take a look. The wound had already closed, there was only dried ichor and faint pink marks from where Lehrer's nails had cut in. He sighed. Everything was fine, Lehrer couldn't keep him here forever. He would be outside tomorrow bothering Ames about her crush on the young love goddess that had moved in from Cyprus. He had to believe that. 

Lehrer was coming closer. Dara squeezed his eyes shut, begging the fates to let him move past. The footsteps stopped in front of Dara's room. Dara laid very, very still. As if not moving would make Lehrer forget he existed.

His prayers were ignored. The door opened. Dara didn't look but he could feel Lehrer's eyes on him. Could hear him come closer, his steps loud on the bare marble floor. Lehrer pulled the sheets off of his body. Stroking fingers over his bare shoulder, they paused for a moment to unfasten his chiton before resuming their path up his neck where they pressed down to hold him in place.

Lehrer didn't say anything when he was finished. Only caressing Dara's hair in a paternal gesture that was horribly out of place. Then he was gone and Dara could breathe again. Once he was sure Lehrer wasn't coming back he silently sat up, wrapping the sheets around himself. He walked to the window to sit and look at the stars until dawn came to hide them away again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ambrosia is the food that gods eat to stay immortal. Nectar is what they drink to stay immortal. From what I could find Ambrosia is described as both a food and a liquid so I based it on honey.  
> Ichor is the blood of the gods.  
> Chiton is what they called the tunic thing they always wore.  
> Dara doesn't have an eating disorder in the traditional sense in this work. Because he is a god he needs ambrosia/nectar to stay immortal. That's why he has a problem with those instead of with normal food.
> 
> Flower meanings 
> 
> burdock: boredom  
> yellow carnations: resentment/disdain


	2. Be to her, Persephone,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we meet Bethany and Noam.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings  
> Implied/Referenced Child Abuse  
> Implied/Referenced rape  
> Lehrer again.

Ames was standing in the water, submerged up to her thighs. She had taken off her armor and was left in a stropion and her chiton, which she had tied around her waist. She had kept him close ever since Lehrer had let him go. Mothering him when he immediately got shit-faced. Not that she was happy about it. She had dragged him to the river to try and sober him up a little. The cold water had worked slightly. His head felt a little clearer already. Not that that was a good thing. 

She sighed tiredly. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yeah." He didn't tell her he was sorry, he never did, but he did stroke his hand over the grass. Purple hyacinths blooming in its wake, the delicate petals unfurling lovingly. He plucked them from the earth and held them out to Ames, "For you."

She gave him a hard look, but she accepted the flowers. Tucking them in the waistband of her makeshift skirt. "I can't always be there to help you Dara. I won't."

He didn't know whether she meant one day she would be too late or if one day she would choose not to come to gather the pieces of him from the ground. Probably the latter. He could see in her eyes that she was hurting too, because of him. That trying to keep him together cost her something. He looked away quickly. "Have you gotten the dress off the new goddess yet?"

Ames's face twisted indignantly, Dara's errors forgotten for a moment. "No! No, I have not. And I will not, thank you very much."

"Why not? I'm sure she wouldn't mind."

"Because she is too young for that kind of stuff."

"She's older than most of us. She just didn't have a physical form."

"Just because she existed in an abstract form for a long time doesn't mean she's ready for those things. Mentally she's still young. Everything is new to her."

"You could ask for a courtship instead. I'm sure she'd love that," Dara said mischievously, his mouth quirking upward. Bethany was young. That was true, but several suitors had already tried to ask for her hand. She hadn't accepted any of them. Or any offer of courtship for that matter. Dara suspected it had something to do with Ames. Seeing as the poor thing had stared slack jawed as Ames came back to Olympus, smirking with her helmet under her arm. Still high on another victory. She hadn't bothered to clean herself. She never did when she had to report back to Lehrer. It was her way of spitting in his face. Bethany had taken to staring at Ames from behind pillars, clearly too shy to try and talk to the older goddess. She had been easy to spot, to Dara at least, Ames was surprisingly oblivious for once. He reached out with his power, trying to find her. She was sitting behind some bushes a couple of feet downstream. Her mind was full of peonies, she must have gathered the courage to talk to them only to see Ames nearly naked. Dara hid his smile behind his hand. For a love goddess she wasn't very good at this.

"I'm not going to ask her permission to court her. We haven't even talked yet! I would look like a creep!"

"I mean that hasn't stopped others."

Ames narrowed her eyes at him. "What."

"I believe she already had to reject ten or so offers."

"What- ten! She's- no. How?"

"Yeah, I do think she needs someone to watch her back right now. I mean she is young," Dara chewed on his bottom lip. "Maybe we should talk to her. I don't want her to make a decision she doesn't understand the consequences of." _Like me._

The anger had left Ames's face, but her eyes were fierce as she told him, "That was not your fault, Dara. It's his and only his." She had told him that often. Everytime he had come back from Lehrer with yet another piece broken off. She had made him say it too. Over and over until he believed her. Ames shook her head,."But you're probably right. Let's go find her."

"Oh, no need," he smiled. "HEY, BETHANY!"

The girl almost fell over in shock, contemplating running before steeling herself. She stood up with as much grace as she could manage. "Yes?"

Ames turned around, eyes wide. Turning back to Dara to whisper, "Could she hear us the entire time?"

He shook his head, pointing at the stream which had concealed most of their conversation. He smiled at Bethany and beckoned her closer. She did so hesitantly, relaxing a little when she noticed they didn't seem angry.

"You called me." Her voice was high but even. Raising an eyebrow in question. Dara considered pointing out that she was the one crouching in the bushes because she couldn't handle seeing Ames in a bra, but he let it slide.

"We just wanted to introduce ourselves, we realised we had been very rude to you and haven't introduced ourselves yet," he smiled at her, "So now seemed like a good time. I'm Dara, this is Ames, but you know that already."

She shot him a mortified look. Her cheeks were very red as she said, "I'm Bethany. Nice to meet you, my lord, my lady."

"Oh, please don't start with that," Ames burst out suddenly. Bethany shot her a surprised look. 

"Titles won't be necessary. I would like it if we were friends," Dara said, taking pity on her.

"I- with me?"

"Yes."

She seemed stunned for a moment before her face brightened with a smile, Dara could practically hear Ames' brain shut down. "I would like that too."

"Come here then," he said, patting the grass in front of him. She gathered the hem of her skirt, gingerly crossing the river to sit at Dara's feet. "What's your favourite flower?"

"I like roses."

"Classic. What kind?" he started combing his fingers through her hair.

"Every kind."

"Alright, sit still for me." He started growing flowers braiding them in her golden hair. She and Ames quickly struck up a conversation about the sea. Bethany thought it had been beautiful but cruel. She liked Olympus better, although she did miss it on occasion. Ames's opinions were a lot less flattering. The sea was not her home anymore. But even she had to admit that it had been a beautiful place, dangerous but beautiful.

"Kind of like you," Bethany suddenly said.

Ames sputtered for a moment. "Uh- Yeah, I guess. Maybe."

Dara loathed to interrupt, but the crown was done. "I'm finished."

Bethany startled, clearly having forgotten he was there, she leaned forward to look at her reflection, "Oh! It's beautiful!"

On her head was a pile of pink and red roses, they contrasted prettily against the gold of her hair. Dara hadn't been able to help himself and had thrown in a bunch of violets.

"It suits you," Ames admitted to her softly. She cleared her throat. "It's getting late. We should head back before they send someone looking for us. You still have to meet the new god, right Dara?"

"Oh, Noam? He's super nice. He set someone on fire because they tried to grope me," Bethany said.

Something unpleasant curdled in Dara's stomach. The only thing anyone had been able to talk about was some new mortal born god that Lehrer had personally invited to Olympus. Even Lehrer hadn't been able to shut up about him. Had stared at Dara from his chair with a pitying smile as he told him about Noam. About how he used to be a mortal but had, after fighting at the destruction of Athens, impressed enough people to be gifted immortality. Told him that Noam knew what hard work meant, knew not to waste his talents. Unlike you. He hadn't said it. Not out loud, but Dara didn't need access to his mind to know what he was thinking. Dara didn't want to meet him. Didn't care. Then why are you so upset?, the voice sounded like Lehrer.

It didn't matter. He couldn't give a shit about Noam Álvaro and his many, many talents. Dara would meet him and have to live next to him until Lehrer discarded him again. Like he discarded everyone.

* * *

His height was the first thing Dara noticed. He wasn't as tall as Lehrer of course, who was so tall it was nearly ridiculous, but still tall. He didn't look divine. His hair and eyes were brown. He was wearing a linen chiton with no adornments and worn sandals. There was nothing about his physical appearance that betrayed his newly gained godly status. But there was something about him that pulled Dara's attention to him anyway. Maybe it was the way his mouth twisted with barely contained disdain. Or how his eyes were alight with the need to burn down the elaborate ornaments in Lehrer's throne room.

Dara could tell the exact moment he noticed Dara. His eyes widened and he stopped breathing for a second. Not so different from the rest after all, Dara thought bitterly after he caught the flurry of deep red and pink of want that flit through Noam's mind when he looked at him.

The boy apparently realised he was staring because he flushed and quickly averted his gaze. Before darting it up to Dara again. "Uh, hi I'm Noam."

Gods he was pathetic. Like an overeager dog. "I know."

Noam fumbled for a moment clearly expecting Dara to carry on the conversation. "I take it you're Dara then."

"I must be." Dara was surprised he managed to utter the words out with his jaw clenched so tightly.

Noam was clearly getting less enamoured with Dara every second he spent in his presence. Something they had in common then.

They waited in an uncomfortable silence. Noam shifted a couple of times, Dara could feel his desire to try and strike up another conversation, but thought better of it. Busying himself with looking at the thrones. Dara watching him from the corner of his eye.

"Ah, good you're here. Noam, I hope I didn't keep you waiting." Lehrer's voice was full of warmth. It wasn't genuine, it so rarely was with him. But Noam ate it up. Straightening his posture before remembering that he was talking to the king of the gods and making a bow. Lehrer laughed and waved him off.

"When we're not in a formal setting, that's not necessary. I want you to feel comfortable around me."

Dara knew exactly what Lehrer wanted. What he was trying to accomplish. What those nice words and affectionate touches cost, but it still stung. He tried to tell himself that this was not the case. That the fact that Lehrer hadn't even glanced at him hadn't hurt.

But when Lehrer put his hand on Noam's shoulder and squeezed, when he acted like a father. Dara suddenly hated Noam Álvaro.

"I hope he wasn't too much trouble," they were looking at him now, talking about him like he wasn't there. And Dara hated Noam even more for witnessing the anger and shame that surely must be all over his face. Lehrer saw it at least. Something cold and amused in his pale eyes. The lighting in his hair refusing to reflect off of them. 

"No, everything was fine," Noam lied, daring a look at Dara.

"Well, it's just a formality at this point but, Noam, meet Dara, god of spring and my ward."

"Pleasure to meet you." Dara smiled a saccharine smile at the boy.

"And this is Noam, new god of justice."

Dara gave Noam an unimpressed once over. "We already have you to judge us. I don't see why he's here."

That made him angry, his eyes burned just a tad brighter. The beginnings of resentment starting to form in his eyes when he looked at Dara. Good.

"As you know, better than anyone, sometimes certain duties or parts of a god's domain overlap with others. Take for example you and Pan." Lehrer shot him a pointed look, "Although I do oversee the judgement of gods, Noam will oversee gods and mortals. Seeing as he is new I have taken it onto myself to mentor him. So I'm afraid you'll have to see more of him."

That was news. Dara kept his face carefully neutral. Noam looked delighted. The idiot. Suddenly a nymph came running in. Looking panicked. Lehrer took one look at her face and promptly dismissed both of them. Apologising for the abrupt ending of their conversation as he ushered them outside. Once they were standing Dara immediately descended the steps. Not looking back at his new replacement.

Gaia, he needed a drink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact: a strophion is an ancient bra.  
> Flower meanings  
> purple hyacinth: apology  
> peonies: bashfullness  
> roses: love and romance. they were also a holy symbol of the goddess Aphrodite  
> Violets: modesty. But it is also a flower that is used as a code by lesbians.
> 
> Pan is the god of nature


	3. All the things i might not be;

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we meet Leo and get to know Noam better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings  
> Drinking  
> Someone not taking no for an answer but it's brief and he is shut down.  
> Mentions of sex  
> Mentions of Gordon Ames and Lehrer  
> Nudity

Dara wasn't into this.

The man that was on top of him was drunkenly kissing his neck, sloppy. Both hands reaching under his dress. His beard was scraping against Dara's skin. Normally he didn't mind the feeling but today it irritated him immensely. He frowned, trying to get through it but it soon became unbearable. He made a dissatisfied sound, pushing the man off him roughly. 

"Hey!" He looked angry, clearly too drunk to remember what exactly Dara was. He gave him a cold look as he pushed himself up from the low couch he had been laying on. Stretching his powers to look for Leo when he was suddenly grabbed from behind. He whipped around to look at who had been stupid enough to grab him, only to see the same man as before. "You can't just say no to me," the man slurred out.

"Actually he can." Leo's voice was ice cold. "Leave. Now." His eyes lit up purple. The guy's face twisted in fear, turning around and sprinting away.

"Thanks." Dara gave Leo a half smile half grimace.

"You don't need to thank people for common decency, Dara." 

Dara just shrugged. Leo sighed, "Be careful, alright. Come find me if something like this happens again."

Dara nodded, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek before going to find himself another man. He danced with a few, letting a couple of them kiss him up against a wall or down against one of the many couches that were scattered over the room. But they weren't enough. He didn't know why. Normally his criteria were: not ugly and has a concept of personal hygiene but tonight they were all wrong. Too short, too bearded, too rough (even though that wasn't a problem at all any other time he did this), too many gills, too blond. He didn't like blonds. At all.

He kicked the last one off him. He was starting to get angry, why weren't they enough? Maybe because they were mortal? He looked around but there weren't many male nature spirits. And he was not fucking a satyr. He wasn't that desperate. So no mortals and no spirits. That left only one option. 

He craned his neck trying to look over all the people that were too damn tall. He finally caught sight of Leo, resting on his back on a couch. A pretty girl was talking to him, leaning forward invitingly. Another was making her way toward him with a cup of wine in her hand. He stumbled against, her stealing the goblet from her as he righted himself. Sauntering over to Leo, trying very hard not to stumble again. Leo had a stupid rule at his parties were you had to be able to walk in a straight line to sleep with people. Leo caught sight of him when he was a couple of feet from where he was lying down. Dara smiled coyly before offering him the drink. "Got you something."

Leo raised an eyebrow at him but didn't protest as he came closer. He handed him the cup of wine, before sliding neatly into his lap. Leo raised his other eyebrow, but he sipped the drink without taking his eyes off Dara. Dara smiled wider, gently running his hand over Leo's chest, drawing little figures. The girl left with a huff when she noticed she wasn't getting anymore attention. He bent forward, resting one of his hands on Leo's chest. Slowly inching the other towards the brooch keeping his chiton on, leaning forward until his lips were almost touching Leo's. "Do you want to?" He ducked his head down to kiss at Leo's jaw. "I'll make it good," he whispered, trying his hardest not to slur the words.

Leo's hand gently caught his just as he started to undo the clasps. "You're drunk, sweet one." It wasn't unkind. One hand resting on his, the other set the goblet of wine down and came to gently rest on the small of Dara's back. "I don't think you're going to sleep with anyone tonight."

Dara flushed with anger, pulling back a little. "You're not my keeper. I can do what I want."

Leo just kept calmly staring at him. "I know. It's just that you can barely stand. And most people are either asleep or gone, anyway." Dara looked up. Surprised to see that most people had indeed left. Or where snoring on the floor. He hadn't realised how late it had gotten. He groaned, thumping his head on Leo's shoulder. 

"I hate you," he mumbled. The words were muffled by Leo's skin but judging by the fact that Leo's chest rumbled with laughter under him he heard it anyway.

"Alright," he said, slowly stroking over Dara's back.

"I don't understand why you're making a big deal out of this. We fucked before. You didn't complain then"

"You weren't drunk then. Maybe you should head home, you're falling asleep on me."

"I'm not getting up. You deserve to be crushed."

"You barely weigh a thing," Leo shot back. "You're too small."

"Shut uuuuup. 'M not small. You- You're too big. Everyone is."

"If thinking that makes you feel better, then sure." Leo was laughing again.

"Hmmm, I said shut up."

"I'm bringing you home. Before you fall asleep here and Ames comes for my head."

"It's fine. I just need some water and then I'll be on my way."

"Are you sure?"

"Almost nothing can hurt me. And besides," he gestured with his head to the back of the room where two satyrs were getting into a fistfight, "You are needed." He clambered off Leo and slipped out the door before he could stop him.

* * *

Dara was trying very hard not to be seen. Keeping to the shadows, his hood pulled low over his face. He was being paranoid, he knew that. It would be unlikely that any gods had lingered after the party. Not without good reason. So he was very surprised to hear Noam's voice.

"Are you lost?"

_Oh for the love of-_

He turned around quickly, Noam was standing with his back to him. Talking to someone else. Dara moved quickly back into the trees, making no sound. Noam hadn't spotted him yet. Too focussed on the child in front of him.

"Yeah, I was walking with- with my mommy. But now she's- she's gone." the boy was crying, barely managing to get the words out between sobs. Noam had crouched down to catch his eyes. 

"I can help you find her. What's your name?" His voice was very gentle and it was doing weird things to Dara's stomach. Noam's mind was full of good intentions and that damned determination that was ever present in his thoughts. Like a string holding everything together.

"Athanasios." His voice was calmer now.

The conversation went on for a while. Noam trying to figure out clues to the boy's place of living. Before standing up and offering his hand to the child. He started walking to the east. Dara knew there was a small village in that direction, it was likely that the boy lived there. He didn't know why he followed them, tried not to question himself too much about it. Maybe Leo was right and he was too drunk to go home alone. On the way there Noam kept up a steady stream of questions, trying to distract the child. It seemed to work. Athanasios was a lot happier when it became clear he had help finding his mother. _So he's good with kids_ , Dara thought. He immediately kicked down the voice that said ' _Husband material_ ' in a voice that sounded suspiciously like Ames.

After ten minutes of walking they arrived at a well worn path leading into an open clearing. Small houses standing a short distance away. There was a woman standing near the edge of the village, talking in rapid fire greek at a man that was presumably her husband. Dara quickly hid behind a rock when he looked up at Noam's approach. But he could feel the _suspicion, surprise, joy_ that went through his mind. He heard the woman letting out a happy shriek as she ran closer and scooped Athanasios up. The joy in her mind matching his. They were talking to Noam now, asking questions and trying to convince him to join them for dinner. He politely refused. They insisted. This went on for a while, Dara suddenly felt horribly stupid. Why had he followed him? It's not like they were friends. Sure, they had spent some time together, he saw him in Lehrer's study during lessons and Bethany liked him a lot but even when they would hang out together they didn't speak to each other. _But his mind was so-_

"What are _you_ doing here?"

Dara cursed himself, drowning too deep in his own thoughts to notice Noam's approach. He was a telepath for fuck's sake. He made sure that none of his feelings showed on his face, acting like he had every right to be here. "I am enjoying the view. What are you doing here?"

Noam gave him a dubious look, "Were you following me?"

Dara stared at him, twisting his face in an incredulous expression, "Following you? Why would I ever do that?"

Noam was angry now, "You can't seriously expect me to believe that you were enjoying the view."

Dara cast a look at the village, "Let's not discuss this here." Without looking back he started walking. Noam following behind. He led them down a hill, to a small enclosed beach. He untied his sandals to bury his toes in the sand throwing his cloak off his shoulders. Tipping his head back to watch the sky.

"Why were you following me?"

"I wasn't following you," Dara lied smoothly. "At least not for long. I happened to be near and decided to go say hi." He smiled innocently. He knew he looked good, all disarrayed curls and coy smiles. Wearing a red peplos that was so finely woven it was nearly transparent, Taye always made the best clothes. Noam was making a valiant effort not to look, but he was a mere man - or well god now- and he wasn't blind. Still, he steeled himself.

"Well, why didn't you say hi? You were literally hiding behind a rock."

"I was going to but when I came close enough you were already talking to the mortals. Most of them get nervous around us, insisting to perform rituals, ask for blessings etcetera. I didn't feel like dealing with all that right now. I'm tired."

Noam still looked skeptical, but there was the beginning of doubt in his mind, thinking back on how he was treated by people now he was a god. "Why were you out here then? It doesn't seem like a place you would willingly hang out. Not enough decadence."

Dara pouted. "You really think so little of me? I can't just enjoy a stroll?" Noam was silent. Dara sighed, "Alright fine. I was there because I was attending one of Leo's parties. He had one last night. You should really come along sometime. What were you doing there?" Noam suddenly looked guarded, but he was thinking about it now and Dara plucked it from his mind easily. "Do you miss being mortal?"

Noam paused for a moment. "I mean sometimes. Like you said people treat me differently now. Sometimes I just want to be a normal person." _I don't want to forget where I came from. Who I'm doing this for._

Right. Álvaro and his everlasting quest to help the people. So desperate to take action he didn't see what was right in front of him. Sure Sacha was a bad guy but not _the_ bad guy. He got why Noam hated Sacha, he did. But it shouldn't be too difficult to realise that Lehrer was _the King of the God's_. It was foolish to believe that Sacha could do the things he did without Lehrer's knowledge. That Lehrer couldn't march down to the underworld to obliterate him in one swipe.

Dara gathered the hem of his robe in one hand and stepped into the sea, not worried about trespassing. He was Lehrer's ward but Gordon had been fond of him for a long time too, he wouldn't hurt him. "You should come in. The temperature is nice."

Noam hesitated, "You're ruining your dress. And I don't have that many clothes."

"Right, well," he stepped back out of the water, "That's easily fixed isn't it?" He walked until he was standing right in front of Noam, tilting his head back until he could look him in the eye. He reached his hand up to undo the clasps on his shoulders. The cloth fell off his body leaving him naked. Noam was blushing but didn't push him away as he reached for the fastener on his shoulder. Undoing it to undress him too. Gods he was beautiful.

He glided back into the waves, Noam following him this time. The water was wonderful, still warm from the sun. He smiled to himself, a real smile. Noam was looking at him with eyes too soft so he splashed some water in his face. "It's rude to stare." 

Noam spluttered for a moment, surprised, before something mischievous lighted up in his eyes. He splashed Dara back and before he knew it it was a full on war. Only stopped when Noam suddenly tackled him. He fell back unto the beach. All the air leaving his lungs when Noam landed on top of him. He laughed, feeling elated, the feeling matching Noam's wide grin. Suddenly his grin fell, his gaze dropped to Dara's lips.

Dara could hear his thoughts almost unbearably tender. He quickly pushed Noam off of him. Knowing that they shouldn't, couldn't. Noam didn't know better but he did. "Look, you can see the stars."

Noam startled, clearly shaken out of his thoughts. He rolled off Dara, onto his back. They didn't say anything for a long time. Noam sat up after what felt like hours, softly telling him they should head back before they were missed. They sped to Olympus, trying to get there first. When they reached the entrance they were both giggling like children. Dara took a moment to catch his breath. Giving Noam a critical once over. "As fun as this was, I have to leave now I'm afraid. Will I see you tomorrow?"

Noam looked surprised at the question. He smiled and said, "If you want."

"Good." he gave Noam one last look over his shoulder, briefly entertaining the thought of inviting him to his chambers before deciding against it. He knew somewhere deep down that fucking Noam wouldn't be like fucking the hundreds of different men he had fucked before. If his body was as intoxicating as his mind... well. It didn't matter anyhow. He quickly strode to his house, walking up the steps and slamming the door behind him. He closed his eyes, letting out a sigh. He was so tired. He carded his hands through his hair, fingers catching on the flowers that had grown there without him noticing. Well, that was embarrassing. He plucked one from his hair hoping it wasn't coriander again. It was -somehow- worse. Purple lilac.

Dara stared at it. Incredulous. No, that was not what was happening. Noam was nice sure, but Dara wasn't in _love_ -

He didn't think he could fall in love anymore. Not after Lehrer had burned down every good thing that had resided within him. Lust, sure. Love? No.

He was not in love, he decided. Plucking all the lilac from his hair and throwing them on the ground. Stepping on them. This wasn't happening.

He was not in love.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Coriander: lust  
> Purple lilac: new love
> 
> The people in ancient Greece were more casual about nudity so that's why they're already naked together.
> 
> A peplos is an ancient greek garment for women. Dara wears them sometimes for reasons that will probably be explained next chapter.
> 
> Yes, Dara and Leo have casual sex sometimes in this AU, but it's more of a friends with benefits thing than an actual relationship. Also I have probably aged Leo down bc I couldn't remember his age so he's 20/21


	4. Take her head upon your knee.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we meet Sacha. And have some foreshadowing by a feral lady. Also fluff. And Noam is a dumbass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like there are two people in this fandom right now. AwkwardJello how are you doing?
> 
> The notes for this chapter were: underworld + flirting and cute dates. Enjoy this because next chapter hurts.
> 
> Warnings  
> dead people (it's the underworld)  
> implied violent death  
> a child having died  
> one person being ominous and nightmarish

Describing the underworld as dark was a bit of an understatement.

Sunlight was not just absent, it actively tried to keep away. It didn't belong here. Dara had to carefully feel his way down the narrow steps. It was a familiar path by now but still difficult to traverse. This wasn't a place for beings like him. He knew that. He suspected this place knew it too.

He walked further down anyway. He didn't have a torch, best not to attract attention while down here.

The dirt turned to smooth stone. It got colder and colder. The passage got wide enough that he didn't have to press himself against the wall anymore. He pulled his hood further over his face, quickly looking around before turning right. walking until he saw the black water of the Styx. The titaness was staring at him from under her waters. He was careful not to get too close. He wouldn't be surprised if she tried to drown him.

Charon was standing next to his boat. His weathered face impassive, waiting patiently. "Got something for me, little prince?"

Dara rolled his eyes at the nickname, but tossed him a coin anyway. Charon pushed his oar into the white sand and started to row them to the other side. The river was pitch black, he tried not to stare at it. The ghostly faces that were just under the water freaking him out. The ride never got any less boring to Dara. He tried to distract himself from it by looking at the dead in the boat. There was a tall proud woman. Her dark hair was done up perfectly. Jewels hanging from her ear. The only thing out of place was the cut along her throat. He spotted several soldiers. All with bloody armor. They looked sullen but prideful. Taking comfort in the fact that they had died serving their states. He felt someone tugging on his cloak, turning around to snap at Charon to keep his hands to himself. But as he glanced down he spotted a young girl. She was looking at him with eyes too big for her face, her cheeks were sunken in. Starvation.

"Are you really a prince?" she asked breathlessly.

He paused for a moment, before giving her a hesitant smile. "Yes."

Her eyes grew even bigger. Childlike wonder took over her face and suddenly she almost looked alive. "I've never met a prince before! You look like one. You're really pretty!"

His smile broadened. "Thank you. You're pretty too. "

"Where is your crown?" she asked, suddenly looking confused.

"I left it at home. I didn't want to lose it here."

"Can I come and see it?"

Dara felt a pang of sadness in his chest. "I'm afraid that won't be possible. You can't leave here anymore."

The excitement fled her eyes. "Oh."

"What's your name, little girl."

"I'm Beatrice! But I like Bea better." She smiled brightly, she was missing a front tooth.

"Well, Bea. Maybe I'll come back here one day and show it to you."

"That would be nice."

He pitied her. But there was nothing he could do. He reached a hand up to his hair, plucking one of the flowers that rarely left his hair loose and gave it to her. It was a Gypsophila. Fitting. She seemed happy with it. Twirling it around. He smiled despite himself. All of a sudden there was a presence at his back, power rolled off of it in waves. He stiffened not daring to turn around, convinced Lehrer had finally made him. Had come to drag him back and never let him leave again. But it wasn't Lehrer. It was Styx.

She was looking at him with her completely black eyes. Rising from the water like a nightmare. She smiled at him, or maybe just bared her teeth. He didn't know. Beatrice was hiding behind his legs.

"That would be nice indeed." Her lips didn't move, but he heard her just fine. She must have spoken, because he had heard her and he refused to come near her mind. He could feel it pulling at him, begging him to just come a little closer, so he could be pulled under and never resurface.

"I didn't think you of all people would be interested in seeing a crown, my lady." She reminded him of a snake. He didn't dare to break eye contact. His gut told him that he could not show her weakness. Everything that was weak was food down here.

"I would love to see you crowned, little rose. And don't call me lady, it's unbecoming." Her lips still hadn't moved besides widening her smile.

"I don't understand." He quickly straightened, throwing his shoulders back and raising his chin. Regretting that movement when her eyes flickered to his exposed throat. "Speak clearly."

"You'll understand in time. Or you could have the information now, I suppose, if you want to take a peek." Her grin widened further, pointed teeth almost reaching her ears.

"No."

"As you wish. Everything will be revealed eventually. Until then, I think I will cherish the fact that I know something you don't," she said the words slowly, tasting them on her tongue, before grinning again. "Yes, I think I will." Her form stopped following the boat and hung unmoving above the water. Watching him. She stared at him for a long time before sinking back under the waves.

"Who was that?" Beatrice sounded terrified.

"A goddess from here. Don't worry not all of them are like that. The underworld tends to be very peaceful." It would be for her. Probably. An eight year old couldn't have done too badly in life.

He almost fell over when the boat scraped the shore. The dead filtering out. He helped Beatrice off the boat. Stroking her hair as he told her goodbye. She teared up when he told her he had to leave, but was soothed by the proud woman with earrings, who had come over to gently take her hand. Dara shot her a grateful look before they both disappeared into the throngs of people dawdling upon the shore.

He moved quickly up the hill. To the house of Hades. There was work to be done.

* * *

It was not as if Dara liked Sacha.

The man was a liar and a coward. Sure, he was smart (or maybe sly was a better description) but not smarter than Lehrer. He was objectively a horrible person, it was just that Lehrer was worse.

"What do you think he is planning with the new god? Can we use him?" Sacha sounded impatient.

"I don't know yet. I know he wants him as a bed warmer and to use him against you. We can't use him. Not right now, he's too enamoured by Lehrer. He is blind to everything that may point in another direction than what he wants to believe," Dara snorted internally, justice was blind, what a surprise.

"Is he a threat?"

"I don't think so," he lied. He didn't know why he was protecting Noam exactly. Maybe it was because no matter how annoying he was he did not deserve to be wrapped up in these games. "He's smart but his powers are new. He doesn't have a good grip on them yet."

"Good, good. Do you have the papers?"

Dara flicked a hand at his desk lazily. "Everything's on there." He stood up. "I have to go. Before they notice I'm gone."

Sacha waved a hand at him. "Fine."

Dara left. Looking at the Styx and seeing Charon was already halfway there. He sprinted down the hill. Weaving his way through waiting souls. Arriving at the shore just in time to see the last of the dead depart. He jumped on board. Charon didn't feel like talking apparently. And he didn't see Styx again. Thank the fates for small mercies.

* * *

"I don't see why they didn't just tell him he was adopted," Noam complained. They had just gotten back from Oedipus Rex, Bethany had been horrified so now Ames was mad that they hadn't left her at home. Noam still couldn't seem to shut up about the play. "I mean, there's nothing wrong with being adopted. And that way he wouldn't have fucked his mom."

"If they had told him he was adopted there wouldn't be a story," Dara pointed out. "And you can't dodge fate anyway, trying to rarely ends well."

"Well what happens to his kids? They're still there."

"There's a sequel of sorts, Antigone. Named after his daughter. Even more of the family dies that one." Dara smiled at him. "I believe they are going to perform that one next week, we can go if you want."

Noam smiled back. "I would like that."

Bethany was still distraught. "All those awful things happened to him. And it wasn't even his fault! He didn't know better!"

Ames shrugged. "I mean, he could have chosen not to murder his father and all his servants."

"His dad was a dick."

Ames seemed shocked at the language coming out of her but Noam just shrugged. "She has a point."

"Both of you are awful, you know that?"

Noam grinned at her, unrepentant. Dara just nodded his head.

Bethany flicked her eyes between them, a look in her eyes that didn't match the big eyed, innocent aesthetic she had going on. "Ames and I have to go. We are supposed to meet Taye about the city defences and hospitals." Dara glared at her, knowing exactly what she was doing.

Both Ames and Noam looked surprised. "Why are you gonna talk about the hospital? It's neither of your domain."

Bethany blushed. "I know. I just learned a lot of medical stuff for fun. It's very important. And very embarrassing that a society as developed as Athens allows them to be in such a bad state."

"Aight. Do we see you tonight?"

"Till then." Ames waved before Bethany started pulling her in the direction of the Acropolis.

"So," Noam drew the word out, rolling it over his tongue. "What now?"

"We can explore the city. You lived here right?" 

"Yeah." He was watching Dara from the corner of his eye. "I'm a metic, or was a metic I guess. I don't live here anymore obviously."

Dara's expression didn't change. "Was it difficult?"

Noam kicked a loose stone from the street. "I mean sometimes. We were always more vulnerable. And looked down upon. Which is stupid! I mean who cares that my parents came from another city? I was born here. I had friends who's great grandparents were born here! How are we not citizens? You know what, the whole citizenship thing is stupid anyway. We're all people, right? What does it matter if you were born on this piece of dirt and stone instead of a 100 feet to the left. States are made up! There's nothing that says 'these pieces of land belong together' or 'these people are worth more than these' it's fucking ridiculous if you think about it-uh." He blushed. "Sorry, I got carried away."

Noam's mind was bright when he got like this, the mere mention of injustice lighting him up from the inside. Dara gently bumped their shoulders together. "I don't mind. You're cute when you get heated."

"Oh, uh. Thanks?"

"Let's go get something to drink. I know a place." He led Noam down to the less well kept parts of Athens. The buildings were dirtier here, still in disrepair after the Persians had torched them down, the people more shady, stray dogs covered in fleas were running down the street. He kept walking until they reached a pompina. It was tucked between two buildings and didn't look very inviting but Dara walked in immediately, Noam following more hesitantly.

"Hey Leo."

"Hey," Leo called back. "Give me a minute."

Dara sat down at the bar, quickly looking around. A group of men was gambling at a table in the corner, loud cries and laughs exploding out in bursts. A prostitute was leaning over another table, talking to the man sitting there in a low voice.

"What would you like?" Leo was in front of them, standing in a straight backed but relaxed stance.

"Give me the least shitty wine you have," Dara told him.

"Thank you for asking so nicely," Leo said dryly, then he turned to Noam. "What do you want?"

Dara turned to Noam who was giving Leo an apprehensive look. "Just some bread and olives is fine, thanks." His eyes followed Leo as he moved around the bar.

"Leo's fine," Dara said softly. "He's been a good friend of mine for a while now." He paused for a moment. "Good fuck too."

Noam choked on his own spit. Leo slid him his glass, setting the food down in front of Noam. "Compliments don't get you a discount."

"Aw, Leo. You know my fathers paying for everything I would never try to spend less of his money," Dara smirked at him, sipping his drink slowly. "I'm only telling the truth."

"Hmm, you like the drink?"

"Still tastes like piss. How do you manage this as the god of wine? You should be ashamed of yourself."

"I'm the god of all wine. Even shitty wine. I don't discriminate."

"Still." Leo just smirked back at him and turned to serve another customer.

They were silent for a long time. Dara was absentmindedly swirling his wine around his glass when Noam suddenly burst out, "Why does he do this?" Dara gave him a questioning look. "This. The bar, The- the serving people. Why does he do it?"

Dara deliberated his wine for a while, considering if he should answer it. "I suppose," he said slowly, "He does it for the same reasons as you." Noam's thoughts suddenly went stinging and indignant. Was he- was he actually jealous? Of Leo? For some reason he liked that. A lot. He bit the inside of his cheek so Noam wouldn't see him smile. "He likes to feel normal once in a while. Just existing, pretending to have an easy life before he has to go back to being a god. And everything that comes with that. I'm sure you can relate. Leo used to be a mortal too. He probably understand you better than most of us."

He could still feel that Noam was unhappy being compared to Leo. So he gently put a hand on Noam's. "There's no reason to be suspicious of him, truly. He has always looked out for me. Made sure I didn't get into too much trouble." The last part was said with a teasing smile in Leo's direction who just gave him an amused look in return.

"So how long have you two had a relationship?"

What?

Dara turned in his seat to give him an incredulous look. Leo was coughing, trying to cover his laughter. He quickly left the bar through a door that Dara knew led to the storage room.

"We're not in a relationship, Noam. We're just friends."

Noam was blushing now. "Oh." His eyes were embarrassed but relieved.

Dara drank the last of his wine, stealing an olive from Noam's plate. Noam was watching him keenly. "When was the last time you had ambrosia or Nectar?"

Dara scoffed at him. "None of your business."

Noam seemed to hesitate for a second before pressing on, "It's important you eat it regularly. You might not have the power to defend yourself otherwise."

 _I don't have the power to defend myself right now._ "Why do you care?"

"I just do. We're friends, I want you to be healthy. Lehrer says you have trouble eating."

"So you're Lehrer's pawn now?"

"What? No! He was just the one who brought it to my attention."

"And you're bringing it up because he wants you to, you're a pawn." Dara felt a tiny bit bad. Noam might not have a choice in bringing it up. But even the mention of him was nauseating.

"He has a point either way." Leo gently set a bowl of ambrosia in front of him. "It would do you good to eat some. You look a little pale."

Dara wanted to yell at him too, but his eyes were earnest. Dara sighed, "Fine." He turned to Noam. "Help me eat it," he said, ripping a piece of bread to dip into the honey-like substance. They shared the food in silence. Dara pretended not to notice he ate extra slowly. When they were done Dara stretched his arms over his head, more than one man turning to look, he was ridiculously pleased that Noam was one of them. "I'm tired of you two ganging up on me. We're leaving, I don't know what I would do if you actually figured out how to get along."

He paid and stood to walk in the direction of the door, laughing when Leo sarcastically called after him that he would make sure he had better wine next time. It was still the middle of the afternoon so there weren't many people outside. Most were either eating with their family's or hiding from the sun. He led Noam out of the city, shooting a quick smile at some guards they passed. He kept walking until they reached a valley. A couple of trees creating shadows on the grass. He sank to the ground to lay on his back. Noam still standing next to him. "I was getting tired of the city."

Noam gingerly sat down. Dara could hear him think. Trying to figure him out. "You know I don't want you to be healthy because Lehrer told me to do it."

You do it because you're too damn good. "I know you do it because you care. It's sweet."

"It was a pretty strong reaction." Dara could hear the questions being asked. He wanted to tell Noam everything. He couldn't. Lehrer would know too. And Lehrer would kill him. Noam might be naive enough to think Lehrer cared but Dara wasn't. Not anymore. Besides, Noam adored Lehrer, he trusted him more than he trusted Dara. He might not believe him. Or worse. Think he misunderstood, think it was his fault that it happened. And if he did believe Dara Lehrer would make him forget or something equally horrible. That couldn't happen.

"You don't know the full story."

"Then tell me." Noam sounded impatient.

"I can't. No, don't give me that look. I can't tell you, I want to. Believe me but I can't. Don't trust Lehrer, okay. Don't. He's not who you think he is."

Noam's mind was permeated by skepticism and frustration. "I should trust you instead?"

"You should trust that I care about you, unlike Lehrer."

"Why do you hate him so much? He has given you no reason to."

Dara shot up, eyes blazing. He jabbed a finger in Noam's chest angrily as he hissed out, "You don't know anything, Álvaro. It is not your place to decide whether he has given me reason or not. I can assure you he has." He was breathing heavily.

Noam held his hands up, palms out, surrendering. "Okay, okay I'm sorry."

"I don't want to talk about it anymore."

"That's fine." Dara hated how Noam's voice sounded. Like he was talking to a panicked animal. Or a crazy person. But he stayed silent as Noam tried to think of a safer subject, "Can I ask you something," his voice was still careful.

"Go ahead."

"Why do you wear dresses sometimes? Not that there's anything wrong with that! You look pretty in them." Noam shut his mouth with a click, mentally screaming at himself. 

Dara smirked at him, laying back down and rolling on his side. Leaning his head on his hand. "Well, as you said, I look good in them. But it started with the fact that Ames hated dresses so we would switch clothes whenever her father made her wear them. Believe it or not but there was a time where Ames and I were the same height. So we could switch clothes easily. I didn't care if I was wearing a peplos and Ames was super happy in a chiton so I kind of got used to them."

Noam smiled, Dara could see him picture him as a child. It was inaccurate, he was pretty sure he hadn't looked so small, or so sweet. At least Lehrer had told him he had been a horrible child created from Chaos to make his life more difficult. "You know Ames is like one inch taller than you?"

"I could never forget. She brings it up everytime she is about to lose an argument." That made Noam laugh, the sound made Dara inadvertently grow a lot of red jasmine and a bunch of gardenia's. He prayed silently that Noam wouldn't ask their meaning. He didn't know what he would tell him. But Noam didn't ask, just laid down on his back. He turned his head to Dara. He thinks I'm beautiful. It was dumb, because most people thought he was beautiful. He was objectively attractive. But he still felt a little thrill every time Noam thought so. 

They stayed in the valley. Laughing and talking. It was surprisingly easy. When the stars were uncovered again Dara told Noam about them. Their names and the stories behind them. 

"When I die I want that too."

"To be turned into a constellation? It seems lonely."

"I would be what I love. Nobody can harm the stars. I would be free."

Noam was studying him, like he was a difficult legal problem he didn't find an answer for. No matter how hard he tried. "Are you not free now?"

Dara shook his head. Turning to give Noam a tense smile. He was very close. Dara froze, anticipation fluttering in his chest. Noam was thinking about it. Torn between kissing him and not wanting to be like all the others. He was very still for a moment. Then he slowly, making sure Dara could see, brought his hand up to cup Dara's cheek. Gently sliding his thumb over his skin. His hand was warm. Dara leaned into the touch and Noam gently stroked his thumb over his mouth. The finger caught on his bottom lip. Dara kissed it softly.

Then Noam seemed to come back to himself. Letting his hand fall away. He stood quickly, dusting off his clothes and extending a hand to Dara to help him up. "It's late."

Dara accepted the hand, letting Noam pull him to his feet. But he didn't let go of it. Staying very close to him. "Are you sure?" He could hear Noam very loudly think ' _NO_ ' but he didn't move any closer. Just squeezed Dara's hand gently. "Yeah."

Dara smiled at him. "Okay. Tell me if you change your mind." Then he let go of Noam's hand and started walking in the direction of Olympus, leaving a stunned Noam behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gysophilia: innocence  
> red jasmine: joy  
> gardenia: secret love
> 
> Styx is the goddess of hatred and the river of the same name.  
> Charon is the guy who ferries the dead to the underworld. In some versions of the myth he rows over the Acheron, river of woe, instead of the Styx.
> 
> A pompina was the Ancient Rome version of a kind of shady bar. I know the story is set in ancient greece but I needed a bar.
> 
> A metic was a foreign resident of Athens. Although they weren't slaves they did not have citizenship. Or any of the positives that came with them, like being allowed to participate in politics. They did get some of the negatives like paying taxes. There were some laws that seemed to be only for metics. They had to pay a special tax and also couldn't marry an Athenian citizen without risking slavery.  
> They didn't always have a bad life, they could get very rich as they were allowed to inherit. The only way a metic could get citizenship was if it was granted to them, this rarely happened. So a family could live in Athens for generations and still be considered a metic. They also seemed to be more vulnerable than citizens for example: being sold into slavery seemed to be an easier process.
> 
> Oedipus Rex is a play about the Oedipus myth. Oedipus gets screwed over in modern day because of Freud, who named the Oedipus complex after him. This is the reason a lot of people think he knowingly fucked his mother but this was not the case. He was adopted and left his adopted parents to dodge a prophesy that said he would murder his father and sleep with his mother. Didn't work out.
> 
> There is a play about his children after he is gone named Antigone, after one of his daughters. Both his sons kill each other. His uncle/brother in law orders his daughter buried alive, he changes his mind but she has already hanged herself. His son to who she was engaged kills himself and then his wife does too. It's somehow almost worse than the first one.


	5. Flippant, arrogant and free,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which I'm very sorry and I promise next chapter is (mostly) happier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings:  
> Gordon Ames  
> Lehrer  
> Implied/referenced rape  
> Drugging  
> Drinking  
> Mentioned desire to drug someone  
> Character having consent issues  
> Mentions of war  
> Mentions of wounds  
> Domestic abuse  
> Mentioned murder of spouse and child  
> Mentioned drowning  
> Slut shaming  
> Emotional abuse  
> Threats of rape  
> This got really dark really fast again I'm sorry. This also got really fucking long.
> 
> I edited the story a tiny bit so it makes more sense. The reason Noam got his immortality is changed. And the destruction of Athens is mentioned once. But that's it.
> 
> There is even more plot now? There is a whole ass war going on. And we have a timeline.  
> Noam became immortal in September of 480 BC. At the destruction of Athens.  
> Dara met Noam in June 479 BC not long after the Persians were beaten.  
> This chapter is several months later.  
>    
> I will explain the gist of the Greco- Persian wars at the end of the chapter. I will also explain Zoroastrianism to the best of my ability.
> 
> Don't ask me how the underwater palace works. The rules are made up. You can eat and drink there. They don't die from the cold or the pressure cause they are gods and somehow nobody flashes anyone. That's because nobody wants to see Lehrer's dick.

After that Dara and Noam grew even closer.

They spent more and more time together. Silently reading side by side, swimming in streams or talking. Noam hadn't kissed him yet. Had wanted to but refrained. Telling himself that he wanted to be special, wanted it to mean something to Dara, wanted Dara to want him and not just another lay. Never mind that all those things were already true. Every day the urge to grab Noam and kiss the life out of him grew. But he could wait. Until Noam was ready.

Noam revealed more and more of himself in the conversations they had. Told Dara about his mothers suicide and how after that his father became a shell of a man. "Sometimes I thought he was already dead. That Thanatos had made a mistake and taken his soul away. I would pray, in the beginning. But help didn't come so I stopped." He frowned, "I wasn't really living back then. Just trying not to die, you know." Dara did know, but for very different reasons. 

One night when it was dark already and they had laid on the grass, Dara wrapped in Noam's himation because he had forgotten to bring his own, he had told him about how he earned immortality.

Persia had invaded them for the second time, they had been interested in conquering Greece for years now. The Spartan king Leonidas I had been defeated by the Persian army after being betrayed. The badly damaged naval force had been forced to retreat, leaving Athens to be conquered. "Most of the city population had already left, but whoever could walk was evacuated. My father wasn't one of them. I stayed with him. There were people who desperately tried to convince me to leave, but I was near starving anyway and dying standing my ground was better than dying on the side of the road. Running away isn't really my thing." Noam laughed. It was a bitter sound.

"I carried my father up to the Acropolis and hid there with the small number of people who hadn't left. We defended ourselves as best as we could, but old people and cripples hadn't been much of a threat against an army. I decided to fight till the bitter end but I was wounded. I was bleeding out in the pantheon. Trying to pray, knowing it didn't matter. The gods had fled with the people and I never believed in them anyway but I wanted power, terrible power. So I could slaughter them like they had slaughtered my father."

Lehrer had granted it to him. Striking him with lighting, it had hurt. Most of Lehrer's gifts did. But he had killed enough of the Persian army that they had retreated. They had been beaten less than a year later.

Dara hadn't seen much of the war. Lehrer had barely let him out during that time. The main reason was that his origins were Persian and Lehrer had thought Dara might betray them. The other reason was that Dara was an easy way for him to relieve stress and confirm to himself that he had complete control and power. Those were difficult months.

He had heard of the war via Ames, who had been forced to lead several battles against the Persians. And Taye who had the delightful task of rebuilding his city from the ground up. It had gone splendidly, Taye was nothing if not efficient.

Getting closer to Noam wasn't smart. The sky was bound to come crashing down onto his head sooner or later. Lehrer wanted Noam, so he would have him. Preferably willingly but he wouldn't hesitate to push if he had to. Meanwhile Noam was determined to wrap Lehrer's web tighter and tighter around himself. And there was Sacha. Who was still the better option in this whole mess but also not a good one. He would get rid of Dara once he had power. Not that Dara minded that. The issue was that Sacha in power meant bad news for a lot of people. Noam wouldn't accept it, even if he did know the truth about Lehrer. And Sacha would squash Noam like a fly, immortal or not.

If Noam knew the truth about Lehrer he would be in danger. If Sacha won he would die. If Lehrer won he would be used like Dara had been used and he couldn't let that happen. He loved Noam too much. If Lehrer won he would kill Dara eventually. He knew Lehrer knew what he was doing. He was waiting for the right moment to eliminate him. Dara wasn't enough of a threat to warrant it yet but his time was running out. 

Gaia, what a fucking mess.

It wasn't very smart at all but Noam made him want to do dumb things. Like hope. Made him want to grab his hand and run away to a place where Lehrer couldn't get them, screw everyone else. He hadn't believed that justice could truly prevail since he was a young child but was tempted to change his mind when listening to Noam.

It was a problem Dara wasn't planning on figuring out today though, today was for getting drunk and hopefully getting someone to fuck him.

They were invited to a feast hosted by Ames's father. Because her father was throwing the party Ames had to go. And because Ames had to go Dara had to go. So he had asked Noam to come with them. It would be more bearable with him there.

Noam looked good. He was wearing a long, dark red chiton. It was pinned closed with a golden lion's pin and tied at the waist with a matching cord. His hair was combed for once. Dara was trying not to look at him too obviously. Sneaking glances from the corner of his eye. But it was difficult, the red contrasting beautifully against the gold of his skin.

He led Noam to the beach where two hippocampi were waiting for them. They were half horse half fish. He mounted one as Noam stared at them in wonder. He came closer and gently pet the animal. Before getting on. They immediately started swimming towards the palace. They descended down to the bottom of the ocean. Passing by a couple of Nereids, Noam waved cheerfully. When they arrived at the gate the hippocampi slowed down. Letting them dismount. Noam started petting him again, saying goodbye and giving it a kiss on it's nose. Dara couldn't believe that he had sunken so low he was jealous of an animal. He really needed to get laid.

They were greeted by Ames who flung open the door with a loud, "Finally!" She gestured to them inside. Immediately embracing Dara. She was wearing a peplos, although a short one. It was very low cut. That next to Dara's very short chiton was apparently a lethal combination. Dara had to stifle his laughter in Ames neck when he heard Noam's thoughts. A mantra of _'Don't stare, it's rude to stare, they're your friends and not objects. This isn't how you were raised Noam Isaac Mendel Álvaro. FUCK.'_

"Come in, Noam! You clean up nice!"

"Thanks, you too." He was so awkward. Dara wondered when that had started being endearing instead of annoying. Ames led them out of the reception hall, her hair flowing out behind her, and into the ballroom. Intending to greet their host. The eyes of Gordon Ames lit up when he saw him. "Ah, Dara! You get more and more beautiful everytime I see you." He stood up to embrace Dara loosely, bending down so Dara could press a kiss against his cheek.

"Thanks for having us," he said, smiling coyly. The man's eyes snatching onto his mouth greedily, it was always nice to have someone wrapped around your little finger.

The god turned to Noam. "You must be his Majesty's new student. How was it that you were granted immortality again?"

Noam shifted uncomfortably. "I tried to fight off a group of Persians trying to desecrate the pantheon. He was impressed by my bravery and granted me power."

"Truly impressive. Those Persians have always been a thorn in our eye. Very annoying. No offence Dara."

Dara just smiled at him. "None taken." Noam was looking at him like he had grown another head. His thoughts a confused jumble. Dara mouthed 'I'll explain later' at him.

They talked for a while before the feast started. Everybody moved to the couches standing in a circle. Dara sat between Noam and Ames. Plates piled high with fish, fruits and ambrosia were being passed around by servants. Nectar and wine were poured generously into cups. Ames was stretched out along the couch on her side. One elbow resting on the armrest, Noam was sitting near her waist, Dara pressed against him. He was picking out things that he thought Noam might like, realising a minute later that Noam seemed to like everything.

"You have no taste."

"Maybe this is just good food!" Noam protested.

"Oh, just shut up."

Noam grinned at him. "Make me." That was an invitation if Dara ever heard one. No matter how badly he wanted to kissing Noam right now was a bad idea. So he just shoved a grape into Noam's mouth. Noam smiled at him while he chewed. Opening his mouth for another one when he was done. Dara gladly continued feeding him.

"This is the gayest thing I've ever seen," Ames said. Dara wanted to snap at her for ruining the moment but he was interrupted by a herald coming into the room.

"His majesty the king has arrived."

Everybody except Dara rose from their seat. Ames a beat too late as her father pulled her up by her arm. She grimaced but bowed just like everybody else. Lehrer waved them away with a benevolent smile. "Don't let me interrupt you. Please, continue." 

If Noam didn't stop being all starry eyed over Lehrer and his infinite humbleness Dara was going to be sick all over his sandals. They sat back down and continued eating. The conversation shifting eventually to Sacha. "There has to be something we can do! That man is not in charge. And he needs a reminder," Gordon was making angry hand movements to punctuate his words. Barely avoiding spilling wine over his daughter.

"The mortals are going to riot soon," Ames said. "They won't take his shit forever. If they do it might also affect us."

"His actions have been causing more and more problems. As the god of the underworld he was never very popular under the mortals but now they outright hate him," Gordon said again. "Someone has to stop him. Can't you try Calix?"

"I'm afraid Harold doesn't consider my counsel useful as of late."

"Why can't you just make him do as you say? You're king," Noam asked.

"It's a complicated situation. The underworld is a domain of it's own. Even I can't march down there without consequence. My fear is that he will free the prisoners in Tartarus to ensure our doom. As revenge for trying to take power from him."

"Why do you fear that?" Ames's voice was cold. She knew that Lehrer was lying. The prisoners in Tartarus were weakened, he would win the battle and people would think him more invincible than ever.

Lehrer chewed on his bite of food, undoubtedly relishing in every pair of eyes in the room watching him, before swallowing and calmly stating. "He told me he would."

The table exploded in a cacophony of noise. Shocked gasp and furious cries flinging through the air. Dara slowly started dissecting his grapes.

Lehrer held up a hand. Everybody fell silent. Hungry, adoring eyes watching his every move. "Now, this is no reason to worry. I have beaten all of them before, I can do it again easily. Especially now I'm older and wiser." His tone was teasing. "And I have many more allies than I did in my younger days. I merely want to avoid war if possible, I'm not a fan of unnecessary bloodshed. It's also that Sacha and I have known each other for a long time. We were never friends, but I do not wish to see him suffer. Perhaps you're right Gordon, maybe he has gone too far to come back." His tone was remorseful as he said it, but Dara knew those eyes, this was as close to gleeful as Lehrer got.

"Nobody would blame you, Calix. He has gone too far. You have given him many warnings and he has ignored all of them. Gaia knows I'm a fan of kicking up a good storm now and then , killing a couple of mortals never hurt anyone," he laughed, Dara put his hand on Noam's knee to keep him calm. "But thousands? In one day at that. The mortals are getting angrier by the minute. We can't let that anger override their fear for us. Not after we barely won the war."

Lehrer nodded. "You are right, my friend. I will not let anything happen to us." He smiled then. "But let's not allow Sacha to ruin this lovely party." After that the conversation turned to safer topics.

When people were done eating the plates were cleared away and music started playing. Gordon Ames was suddenly falling next to him on the couch. "Dara! I'm so glad you're here. There was something I wanted to discuss with you." He handed him a glass of wine. Dara gladly drank it. It made him feel warm.

He saw Noam get up to leave. Asking Ames if they had a bathroom. He followed them with his eyes, jealousy burning lowly in his stomach. He had read Ames' mind, he knew what she thought of Noam. What she might try when she found out Noam wasn't gay. He didn't blame her. She hadn't realised the extent of his feelings yet. How could she when she was used to barely glancing at any man twice. _Well_ , his eyes slid back to guiltily Gordon, _some got more than twice._

"What is it?" He tried not to sound impatient.

The man stood up, holding out his hand. When Dara took it he led them to a part of the room where the floor was kept clear for dancing and conversations. He slid the hand that was not holding Dara's to the small of his back. Dara put his other hand on his shoulder. They were pressed very closely together, Dara could feel him relishing in getting away with so much contact in plain sight. It was getting harder to focus, he felt very warm and loose. "I have a present for you."

He led them into a slow dance, matching the music. Dara raised his eyebrows, "And you needed to get me away from everyone to tell me that?"

Gordon chuckled, "It's something new from Egypt. They figured out that if you combine the right herbs together it acts as a stimulant. I've been assured it drives people out of their minds with lust."

Dara felt uneasy, his stomach twisting in a knot. But it was difficult to worry. Was there something in the wine? He gave the man a sweet smile, tipping his head further backwards so the line of his neck was exposed. "Don't be too hard on yourself. You don't need something like that." _Distract him._

Gordon chuckled, bringing his mouth closer to Dara's ear to whisper to him in a low voice "It's not for me, little one. It's for you. I don't mean it as an insult, of course. You satisfy me wonderfully, don't worry. But, just think about how beautiful you would be with the aphrodisiac in your body. You would be driven out of your mind with lust, taking anything I give you and still begging for more. It's completely safe and you'll enjoy it when you take it." Dara could see the images in his mind. Dara, face flushed, spread out over the sheets like honey. Begging and helpless.

"Dara?" the god asked. Dara uncurled the fingers that were twisting the fabric of Gordon's himation. The man mistook his fear for excitement and smiled at him. "It can happen soon, don't worry." His voice lowered, "I am looking forward to it too." He pressed closer, Dara could feel the beginning of his erection through the heavy fabric of his clothes.

He pulled back a little. Trying to gather his thoughts. "I don't know if it's a good idea."

The lord raised his eyebrow, looking at him like he was a petulant child that didn't want to go to bed, "I already told you, it's safe. I won't give you too much. You'll enjoy yourself, I promise." He gave Dara what he must think was a reassuring smile, but all Dara could feel were Lehrer's fingers under his chin as he told him _'You wanted this. You've been desperate for months. It's your fault this happened. Don't pretend you don't know that._ A memory of his first time with Gordon came up, Did you enjoy it? he had asked. Dara had said yes. He had meant it. He _had_.

He looked over Gordon's shoulder, and caught Lehrer's cold gaze. Flaunting in front of him was never smart. He hated reminders that Dara wasn't his entirely. Dara knew that. Even though Lehrer told him that he didn't care that he was a filthy whore he still hated to be reminded of the small ways in which he couldn't own Dara. 

Where was Ames?

"I have to go," he told Gordon, throat tight. He quickly pushed away and tried not to run out of the room. Lehrer's strange eyes following him. He quickly stumbled up the stairs to where he could feel the presence of Noam and Ames. They were standing close, very close. 

"Hope I'm not interrupting." His voice was even but Ames had always seen right through his bullshit. She thought a quick apology in his direction. Setting him down near the bed. They ended up drinking even more wine. Laying in a drunken pile on Ames' bed. His head resting on Noam's stomach. Telepathy was difficult with this much alcohol in his system but he could hear Noam freaking out about it. He smiled to himself. Cute.

"What did Ames' father mean when he said you were Persian?" Noam asked eventually.

"You know how the Greeks import Gods?"

"Yeah."

"That's what happened with me. What Lehrer told me is that I used to be a part of Zoroastrianism. A Persian religion. Apparently I was a manifestation of the spirit of Haoma. It's a divine plant that can do incredible things, like healing."

Noam stared down at him, "You're a plant?"

"No, you idiot," Dara sighed. Ames burst out laughing. Tears were rolling down her face and she was shaking so much Noam's head almost slid off her stomach. "I don't understand it all myself. You know that gods are fuelled by belief. I used to be a manifestation of Haoma, but I'm worshipped by the greek people now. That means I'm not entirely a part of zoroastrianism anymore. My being has changed. Do you understand?"

"Uh, sort of. Wait, how did Lehrer get you? Did he just waltz in and grab a holy plant spirit?"

"What he told me is that he 'rescued' me. Like I said, Haoma is a plant. It can however manifest itself as a human. A part of it manifested as a toddler. Lehrer happened to find me and I was taken to Greece. I know I'm not the entirety of Haoma, just a small part of its spirit."

"You're a mix between a greek god and Haoma."

"Yes."

"Is that why you chose Dara as a name? Because it is Persian."

"Yes," Dara said. "It seemed fitting."

"It's a beautiful name."

"Thanks." Dara's voice was soft. He took a deep breath, "We have to leave before your father starts wondering where we went."

Ames snorted. "He can go and fuck himself. I hate him."

Noam said gently, "Don't say that."

"Don't tell me you like him." Ames sounded mocking.

"He's a bit of a dick, sure. But he doesn't seem-"

"He killed my mother."

The words hung in the air. "...What?"

"You think I got this power without a price?" Ames laughed bitterly, "Being one of the youngest Olympians isn't something that happened because of coincidence. My father wanted us to be powerful. He heard that Styx could grant it to you, if you were strong enough. My mother was a lowly Oceanid. I had an older brother. We weren't very powerful. He bathed us in the Styx. He didn't want to make the same mistake Thetis did and hold us so we would have one vulnerable spot. So he put us in a bag. The Styx killed my mother for trespassing on her territory and my brother was so busy screaming that he forgot to hold his breath. He drowned." Ames paused. "I didn't scream. I didn't do anything. I just sat there. She spared me for some reason." She smiled bitterly. "And now I have power."

Noam was staring at her in shock. "But didn't your father hear them scream?"

"He heard, he just didn't care. He could have known it was a stupid plan. That's why I hate him. And I wish he would die. Got it?"

"Yes."

"Great. I'm going to be sick," she said right as she threw up in the bowl Dara was already holding in front of her. He held her hair out of her face with one hand and rubbed her back with the other.

Noam was still in disbelief. _His family, his own family, drowned like a sack of unwanted cats. He was a monster. Did Lehrer know? This psychopath was in charge of the entire sea. Someone ought to kill him. Someone ought to take a knife and-_

"Hey, Noam. Hey. We have to go. They're going to send someone looking for us soon. Okay? So we have to go now."

"Did you know."

"Yes, I did. We have to go now."

"But Ames-"

"Ames will be fine," Dara said, "I promise. Right Ames?" She gave him a thumbs up from where she was still bent over the bowl. Dara grabbed Noam's hand and led him down the stairs. Almost falling down the last few steps. Noam managed to hook an arm around his waist just in time. Dara started laughing drunk on the wine and Noam's attention. They stumbled down to the first floor and against the wall, Noam's hands on his hips. He tilted his head back, enjoying the airy excitement of Noam's thoughts. Excitement that capsized into rage at the sound of Gordon Ames voice.

"Ah, there you are. We were wondering where you boys went." His smile was friendly. Noam was so angry Dara thought for a second he was going to fight him right there. He held onto Noam with both hands, just in case.

"Noam, are you okay? You look pale." Great, Lehrer was here too. And Noam was going to tell him everything. Dara didn't want to see what he would do when he was told absolutely no new information. He wouldn't dethrone Gordon, that's for damn sure. So instead he stumbled over to one of the other guests, a half god or something? Didn't matter. He pressed up against him, stealing his wine glass, "Do you mind?" He drained it and turned to give everyone a brilliant smile.

Lehrer walked closer to him. "I think that's enough," he said mildly. He turned to Gordon. "I'm afraid we must leave. The party was lovely."

"Oh, so soon? You boys can stay here if you want," he said, looking at Dara. 

"That isn't necessary."

"Actually-," Dara started with a coy smile already dancing on his lips.

"You'll be going with me. I feel like I have been remiss in my duties as your guardian," Lehrer said in a clipped voice. Dara's blood froze. He knew what that meant.

They got back onto their hippocampi. Riding in silence. Noam still radiating resentment. They broke the water and got off. Noam and Dara stumbling onto the beach, Lehrer striding as graceful as always. He stood still for a moment. A terrible figure against the night sky. "You'll not embarrass me again." Noam winced. Dara could barely bring himself to be afraid. They walked up Olympus in silence. Noam offered Dara an arm when he swayed. He took it gladly. Putting one hand in the crook of his elbow and placing the other on Noam's bicep. When they arrived at the gate Noam offered him to Lehrer. _Like a reverse wedding_ , Dara thought. He almost giggled, Lehrer's emotionless eyes freezing the sound in his throat. 

They parted ways, it was just him and Lehrer now. And as soon as the doors closed it would begin.

Lehrer's right hand was pressing deceivingly soft into Dara's waist. When he stumbled over the stairs his left hand shot out to steady him. Grabbing his hand. "Careful." his breath tickled Dara's ear. He led Dara through the throne room and into his quarters. He opened the door and shoved Dara through it with such force he fell forward and skidded over the marble. The door closed and locked itself with a click.

"That was shameful," Lehrer said calmly. Dara was very sober all of a sudden. "I get that a slut like you has difficulty keeping his legs closed for five seconds, but really Dara," Lehrer tutted. It took Dara a second to remember Gordon Ames.

"I thought you didn't mind it, if it was your friend." He knew better than getting up

Lehrer came slowly closer, everything about him screamed predator "I am tired of you not being able to keep yourself together. I know that you're broken but I had expected more from you." He paused. "Maybe that was my mistake." Then he kicked Dara in the ribs. Hard. Something broke and he curled in on himself. Lehrer bent forward to twist his fingers into his hair and dragged him towards his bedroom. Dara scrambling along, trying to walk on his hands and knees but he was moving too fast. Lehrer threw him onto the bedroom floor. Towering above him like a hurricane, the lighting in his eyes promising something terrible.

"Just look at you," his voice was disgusted, "A desperate mess. Do you really think that Noam will want you?" That cut deeper than Dara could describe.

"He does want me," he said before he could stop himself. Gods, he was pitiful.

"He wants you now. But do you really think he wants _you_? The real you. Not the pretty lie that you've made him believe, but the broken thing that you are? Dara please, I didn't raise you to be stupid. No one could love that."

"He doesn't want you either!" The words flew out of his mouth before he could stop them. Lehrer kicked him hard across the face for his troubles. He rested his foot on Dara's cheek. Regarding him passively.

"That's where you're wrong. He does want me. You've been in his mind. You saw it too. He wants me and the things I can give him. When I have him, I will have to let him take you some time. I think you two would look beautiful together. Would you like that, flower?" Dara shook his head as best as he could with Lehrer's sandal pressing into his cheek, mute with horror. "No? I would have thought you would. You're desperate for me, you're obsessed with him. The perfect combination. Noam's so eager to please, I think that when I'm done with him he'll gladly put on a show with you." Lehrer's pale eyes were amused now. "You say you don't want to but I think you're lying to yourself. I think you will enjoy yourself very much. But if you're so against it maybe I should keep you to myself. Is that what you prefer?" Lehrer put his foot back on the floor.

Dara forced his lips to move, "Yes."

Lehrer didn't let up, "Yes, what?"

"Yes, sir."

"Mh, better." He leaned down to heal his split lip and the bruises on his face. "What are you saying yes to?" His eyes were dancing with mirth. His thumb was smearing the golden ichor over Dara's lips.

"I want- I want you to keep me to yourself, sir." The words cut up his throat like glass. Lehrer healed his ribs.

"That can be arranged. Undress." He moved back so Dara could climb to his feet. He let out a shuddering sigh. Slowly untying his belt and letting it drop to the floor. Then he reached up to the pin on his shoulder to unclasp it. Letting the clothes fall off his body. Lehrer took him in, slowly moving closer so he could run his hands over Dara's body. Thumbing one of his nipples and smirking when Dara shook. He led him to the bed, turning him around and bending him over it. Dara could hear the rustle of clothes falling to the floor and closed his eyes.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Noam is a respectful boy BUT he is also a bisexual teenager okay. Sometimes he loses his shit about cleavage and upper thighs. That'd just bisexual disaster law. I would know. Do you think you can look at Dara AND Ames and not be at least a little horny. NO.
> 
> Thanatos is the god of death  
> Nerieds are sea nymphs.  
> A himation is a cloak worn over a chiton.  
> A hippocampus is a horse mermaid.  
> An oceanid were nymphs. Often associated with water, but there were exceptions Daughters of the titans Oceanus and Tethys. There were three thousand of them. One of them is Styx in some myths.  
> Tartarus is the dungeon of the underworld. Bad people are punished there. It's a deity as well as a place.
> 
> What happened to Ames is based on the myth of Achilles. 
> 
> Now, are you ready for an essay?  
> The Greco Persian wars started in 499 BC and ended in 449 BC. It was a series of conflicts fought on both land and sea. This is the war where the legend that started the marathon was created. 
> 
> There's a lot there, but what basically happened is: the Persians invaded Greece, first they conquered a couple of colonies then a large part of Greece. Including Athens. The city states reluctantly worked together to stop them. 
> 
> Eventually the Persians retreated from Athens because Sparta sent an army to Athens, after they threatened to accept Persia as their new leader. The Persians retreated and somehow lost at the battle of Plataea on land. Their infantry was no match for the heavy amoured greek hoplites. Hoplites were men armed with a spear who fought in the phalanx formation. (The formation were everybody has a long spear and the front row has them lowered so they stick everybody who comes too close dead.)
> 
> When the marine heard that the battle was won they beat the Persian fleet. Turning the war around. After this Greece went on the offence. Eventually either signing a peace treaty with Persia or simply leaving. There are several conflicting accounts.
> 
> Zoroastrianism is a very old religion that is still practiced to this day. It was based on the belief of a Persian prophet who said he had met Ahura Mazda. A benevolent god who's adversary is Angra Mainyu, although he is no match for Ahura Mazda.  
> The religion focusses a lot on good vs bad. But also on humanity and free will. As a human you're supposed to choose to do the good things. 'Good thoughts, good words, good deeds.' You are judged after you die and go to either heaven or hell. Certain aspects of the religion are speculated to have influenced many other religions, like: second temple judaism, Christianity, islam, buddishm. 
> 
> Haoma is a mythical plant in Zoroastrianism. It has abilities like healing, boosts physical strength, furthers sexual arousal, makes you more alert. The spirit can appear as a beautiful young man. (guess who)
> 
> Story explanation: Dara manifested as a human form of haoma as a kid. Lehrer kidnapped him (guess why?) and took him back to Greece. 
> 
> In this story, Gods are made and powered by belief. So if people believe Gods have power then they will have power, then they will be able to prove that they have power by either miracles or disaster, thus confirming to people that they exist and have power. It becomes a bit of a loop. The loop also works the other way. People believe less in gods  
> -> gods get less power.  
> This is why gods want to keep power and also to have their followers at least tolerate them. (This also causes wars a lot. As gods often want to extent their influence and an easy way to do this is by subjecting other people.)
> 
> So when Lehrer brought Dara back to Greece he basically held him up like simba and broadcasted his voice to all the people and said 'This is my son, he is a greek god now. Worship him.' the greeks did so and Dara became a greek god as well as a manifestation of Haoma. He's now this weird hybrid between hellenism and Zoroastrianism. Retaining some of his old powers while also warping into something greek.
> 
> Jesus Christ this is long.


	6. She that had no need of me.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which it is finally happening!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may have created even more plot. Goddamnit.
> 
> Warnings  
> (badly written) Sexual content. It starts at "Dara smiled and pulled Noam down into another kiss. "You're so sweet to me." Noam blushed more. "Alright let's go." and ends by the horizontal line.
> 
> I've never written it before and the pacing is a bit odd but they have fun.
> 
> We get some info on Lehrer. We see more of Taye and Ames. I can't let things be happy so next chapter is heavy again.

"I don't understand people could possibly read the Iliad as straight. The only straight character in it is Agamemnon."

"What about Helen?"

"She's obviously a lesbian, Dara."

"Do you think the war was her fault?"

"No! I don't get why people don't like her. She's someone trapped by our society. If people had let her choose her spouse maybe she wouldn't have run away."

"Some say she was kidnapped."

"That makes it worse! Then it wasn't her fault at all. Yet people blame _her_ for the war. Like it was about her in the first place. The men fighting didn't want her back, they wanted honour and glory. She was just an excuse."

"Menelaus wanted her back."

"No, he didn't. He was king, he could have found himself a younger wife. It was about wanting to punish the people who took his property and damaged his reputation. Not her. Ten years is a very long time. She was like thirty or Thirty-five when he got her back? So bearing him children was not easy for her anymore. And he tried to kill her! Ten years of war for your wife just so you can kill her! Are you kidding me?"

"I love how she convinced him to take her back with her tits. She knew they were all stupid."

"Odysseus had every braincell in that army," Noam said. Dara laughed at that. Surprising both of them with the sound. Noam's eyes softened and he got an absent smile on his face. Noam got that look more and more on his face whenever he was around Dara. Dara could see Noam's feelings for him deepen every day. Was it love? He thought it might be. It felt like what some married couples felt when they looked at each other. A different version of what Ames felt for him. He had thought that Noam's love would feel like fire, like how he felt when he was talking about slavery, philosophy or the metics in Athens. It wasn't like that at all. It was warm and sweet and Dara wanted more of it. 

_Maybe he's saving the fire for in bed_ , Dara thought. He broke eye contact, biting his lip. Now was not the time to fantasise about that. "But you're right, the Iliad is very gay. I was surprised when people thought Achilles and Patroclus weren't together."

"They were, right? Did you exist back then?"

"No, I'm not much older than you. But Raphael was there and he said they were a delightful couple."

"Raphael. Wasn't he the patron god of Troy or some shit? Didn't he kill both of them?"

"He was. He did some terrible things during that time. He was still pretty messed up back then. Everyone was." _Some still are._

"Because of the Titan war." Noam chewed on his lip. "Lehrer lost his brother there."

"Yeah, he's still so sad about that," Dara said bitterly, "Raphael was not right for a very long time. He's better now. He and Adalwolf were very close."

"I haven't met Raphael yet."

"He doesn't like Olympus and Lehrer. He avoids them when he can." Dara was jealous of him for having that option. "He has beings who studied under him and they are responsible for the healthcare now. I'm pretty sure he doesn't take new ones. Bethany is still waiting for him to visit so she can try and convince him to teach her."

"Why doesn't he like Lehrer?"

Dara laughed. "Because you can't trust Lehrer. He's not what he pretends to be."

"You have said that before but you never say why." Noam pushed a hand through his hair, messing it up further. Dara suppressed the urge to comb his fingers through it.

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"We've been over this. I already told you that you would be in danger."

"If Lehrer is evil I'm in danger right now."  
  
"You are in danger. More than you know."

"I can protect myself, Dara." Noam sounded so sure of himself. He was so naive and hopeful and _good_. Lehrer would kill that if he got his hands on him. Like he had killed all that was good in Dara.

"You can't," he said, voice breaking.

Noam was silent for a long time, not wanting to turn this into a fight, "What do you know about Adalwolf?"

Dara sighed, "Lehrer named his dog after him, he was the titan of the sun and he wants him back."

"That's what you're for."

"Basically."

"Any succes?"

"No, not yet," he hesitated before pressing on, "I don't want to do it."

"Yeah, I saw that in our lessons." Noam shuddered at the memory. "Does he make you do it often?"

"It's not like he makes me do it every day. But at regular intervals."

"Is it always a bird?"

"No, that was tame," Dara laughed, "One time he made me try it on a human, that was bloody." Noam didn't say anything, mind frozen in shock. And when Dara turned his mouth was hanging open.

"You're lying."

"I'm not." Dara suddenly felt cold again. "He was young. Had a dark complexion." He was silent, thinking about how he had failed to resurrect the boy. How Lehrer had done it easily. Had made him bang his head against the wall until his face wasn't recognisable as human anymore. "He looked like me."

Noam's thoughts were a tangled storm. Doubt, horror, confusion. "But if you want to now more about Adalwolf you will have to ask either Lehrer or Raphael. And Raphael only comes here when he absolutely has to, so Lehrer is your best option. I'm not sure he will want to talk about it. He never took kindly to me asking questions," Dara muttered.

"What do you think happened?"

Dara let his head fall backwards and blew out a breath. "The official story was that you had the Titans and after a while a more powerful race started to emerge, the gods. Kronos did not like this. He ate some of them, they fought back. They won. They have the power now. Adalwolf died during the fighting. I think that's at least mostly true."

"Why mostly?"

"Victors write history," Dara shrugged. Noam frowned, looking at his lap. Thoughts a whirlwind. Dara gently stroked his cheek with the back of his fingers. "Stop worrying about it for now okay." He took the book out of Noam's hand. Noam let it go easily. 

"Alright." They stayed under the tree they were resting against, waiting out the hottest hours of the day. Dara laid down and curled on his side, closing his eyes and dozing of. Noam was softly humming a song. When the evening finally fell he stretched his arms over his head, making a pleased sound. It apparently reminded Noam of a cat, he had to bite his lip to stop smiling. Dara sat up, staring at the heliotropes he had covered the grass with and deciding that he couldn't wait any longer. _I love you._

"You know," he began, twisting a couple of the flowers between his fingers, "I don't think I've ever had to beg a man to kiss me before." Noam was staring at him with wide eyes, wondering if he heard it right, considering if he should pinch himself. Dara laughed exasperated, "I want you, Noam Àlvaro. I want _you_. Now kiss me."

Noam shook himself out of his stupor, bringing a hand up to cradle Dara's face. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," he said breathlessly. Noam nodded and leaned forward to press their lips together gently. Moving back after a few seconds. Dara opened his eyes, wanting to ask if something was wrong. But Noam just pulled him a little closer. Dara took the hint and swung a leg over his lap, straddling him. Noam placed his hands on his waist, slowly stroking up and down. Dara leaned down again, giving him a few slow kisses, sliding one hand in Noam's hair and melting against him. He parted his lips against Noam's, slipping his tongue in his mouth. Noam responded eagerly. Holding him like he was scared the wind was gonna steal him away.

They kissed for a long time, Noam's hands eventually wandering under his chiton. He smiled when Noam squeezed his ass, grounding his hips down against Noam's erection in response. Noam broke the kiss, he groaned, head falling forward against Dara's shoulder. He looked up. "You're killing me."

Dara leaned forward, taking Noam's bottom lip between his teeth and tugging on it. Smirking at Noam's blown wide pupils. "We've only just begun." Noam groaned again, rolling him onto his back. He looked down at him, eyes wide with wonder. "You're perfect." Dara smiled at the sincerity in his voice. 

"Do we have oil?"

Noam paused, thinking, "Uh, no. Shit."

"That's fine. I'll have to wait until next time to have you inside of me then." Dara smiled mischievously up at him. He could hear Noam's thoughts crash. _He wants there to be a next time._ "We'll just have to find something else to do." 

Noam frowned. "Wait, here?"

"Yes. Is that a problem?" Dara asked slightly surprised.

"It's not that I don't want to. Believe me," Noam laughed nervously, "It's just that, I mean, I don't want to be like the others-"

"You're not."

"I mean it."

"Noam."

"I'm not gonna fuck you and then leave."

"I know."

"I don't want to have you in the dirt. It can't be comfortable. And you're not just a random person I-"

"Noam," Dara interrupted him, "It's not a problem. We can go to my chambers."

"Alright, I- I just- You deserve the best," Noam stammered out. He flushed.

Dara smiled and pulled Noam down into another kiss. "You're so sweet to me." Noam blushed more. "Alright let's go."

They ended up on Dara's bed, Noam's head between his legs and scissoring two fingers inside of him. Dara was gasping Noam's name, crying out when Noam suddenly curled them and touched his prostate. "Another one. Come on, I'm ready." Noam obediently slid in a third. Thrusting them a little faster in and out. Pulling of his cock with a wet sound. "That feel okay?"

"Yes, yes, oh-" Dara moaned.

"S alright, baby. I got you." Noam pressed open mouthed kisses against his stomach. "You ready?"

"Yes! Noam, please." Gods he sounded desperate. Noam carefully pulled his fingers out. He sat up and reached for the vial of oil again. Coating his cock in the liquid. He hesitated before dripping more over Dara's hole, hesitating some more before sliding his fingers back in. Dara made a noise of protest. Noam stilled immediately. 

"Did I hurt y-"

"No! You didn't hurt me. I just need you to start."

"Baby, I'm just making sure."

"I'm ready! I promise."

"Okay." Noam bent forward to kiss him again, "Be patient alright. I've never done this before. Don't wanna hurt you on accident, baby."

"You're not going to, Noam." Noam kissed him again before sitting up. He reached down with one hand to steady his cock against Dara's wet hole. Slowly sinking in. He closed his eyes and let his head fall forward onto Dara's shoulder. Dara's mouth had fallen open, soft noises coming out. Noam stayed still to let him adjust, rubbing his hand over Dara's thigh. After a moment Dara placed a hand on the back of Noam's neck, pulling him down a little. One leg resting in the crook of Noam's elbow. "Come closer."

Noam did. Placing his leg on his shoulder and slowly bending forward to kiss Dara again. "You're so beautiful, baby." It was more drawl than words

"So are you." Dara smiled. "Now, do me a favour and move." Noam kissed him again. Then he started moving his hips. Slowly at first, shifting until he found an angle that made Dara moan. After that he began speeding up and finding a rhythm. He was sighing out Dara's name like a prayer. Whispering sweet things in Dara's ear with a low voice. Dara had one hand twisted in his hair. The other was gripping his shoulder. Noam was pressing kisses to his mouth, moving down to his jaw and neck. Dara's stomach was tightening more and more with each thrust. "Ah! Noam, I'm close."

"Me too." He moved his hips faster. Punching little 'ohs' out of Dara with each snap of his hips. Dara let go of Noam's hair to grip his own dick. Jerking of quickly. Until he came. Noam fucked him through it. Coming shortly after.

He leaned on his elbows, desperately trying to catch his breath. Dara smiled at him, moving his leg of his shoulder as Noam moved back and pulled out gently. "Fuck." He rolled onto his back. Dara immediately cuddling up against him. Not willing to let him go so soon. He could already hear Noam start to doubt himself and his performance.

He kissed Noam deeply, "That was wonderful," he said, resting his cheek on Noam's chest, looking up at him through his lashes.

"Yeah?" Noam's hand came up to stroke Dara's sweat sticky curls from his forehead.

"Yes," Dara said smiling. Noam smiled back shyly. Stroking his hand over Dara's back in big sweeps.

"I'm glad." Noam pressed a kiss to Dara's hair. Dara shifted, sitting up to drink Noam in. Who flushed and avoided his gaze.

"Don't get shy now. Your cum is dripping down my thighs." Noam flushed more. Dara smiled, "Let's go clean up." He slid of the bed to walk to his private baths. They quickly wiped themselves clean before sinking in the water. Although the bath was big Dara stayed close to Noam. Pressing up against him and pulling him down for more kisses. Noam was happy to give them to him. They ended up having round two in the water. Afterwards Noam was pressing kisses all over his face. "We should get out. Before it gets cold," he said.

"It's enchanted water. It stays clean and warm, but you're probably right." He pressed a last kiss to Noam's mouth before climbing out of the bath. Not bothering with clothes. He changed the sheets with a flick of his wrist and jumped back into bed. Stretching out on his stomach. Resting one hand under his chin and absentmindedly playing with his curls with the other one.

Noam laughed. "We feelin' lazy today?"

Dara tilted his head back to look at him, "You tired me out." Noam laughed again. Climbing up on the bed beside him, running a gentle hand over Dara's shoulder blades. Pressing a kiss to the nape of his neck. "What are you doing?"

"Well, I was planning on kissin' all of your freckles. Is that okay?" Noam said between kisses.

"Yes," Dara sighed contently. Noam pressed a quick kiss to Dara's cheek before moving back to his shoulders. Moving lower and lower, until he was kissing the dimples on Dara's back. Gently massaging his ass. Dara gave him a look over his shoulder. "I like were this is going."

Noam smiled against the small of his back. "I've only ever done this with girls before. So you'll have to tell me what you like."

"Don't worry," Dara grinned, "I can teach you."

* * *

They didn't hide the fact that they were together. Dara didn't see the point as Lehrer had read Noam's mind and knew everything as soon as he stepped into his office. Most people didn't believe it would last more than a week. It was Dara after all. Even though Noam could barely stand to be away from him after they had slept together. He would sit right next to Dara with an arm wrapped around his shoulders or walk next to him while holding his hand. Offering him his himation whenever he seemed cold. He even threatened to fight a satyr who had made a lewd remark at Dara's expense. Dara could fight his own battles, but the fact that Noam cared so much made him happier than he would ever admit.

There were two perfect weeks in which Dara could scarcely believe this was real. That he had not somehow died and gone to the isle of the blessed. Even with Lehrer there and Noam's worship of him and Sacha's ever growing impatience they were the best weeks of Dara's life. He could not remember ever being as happy as when Noam carded his fingers through his hair, or kissed him while cradling his face like it was made of the most precious of jewels or when Dara had finally convinced Noam of the joys of outdoor sex and he had covered the entire valley in flowers on accident. Noam had laughed then, a mix of bashfulness and pride on his face when he saw the evidence of what they had done.

Noam had also started to bring him gifts. Flowers or plants he thought Dara would like, seeds from far away lands he bought from foreign merchants and sailors, books and silks and jewellery from the agora. Dara didn't need any of these things but he had to admit they were nice to get.

"It's just that my mom told me to always be thoughtful. And I don't know how serious you want this to be. But we didn't really do things in the right order so, um, I guess I want to make it up to you," Noam had said as he fastened a delicate golden bracelet shaped like leaves around Dara's wrist. Dara had smiled and thanked him, resisting the urge to grab his face and scream 'Are you courting me?' at him. He knew that wasn't Noam's intention. No matter how much he wanted it to be.

It couldn't last forever. He was aware of that. Eventually this dream would shatter just like all the others and he would have to make do with the stars again. But he would let himself have this, for now. Couldn't resist pretending that everything would be okay, even if it was only for a little while. The cracks were already starting to show in little ways like Noam asking questions about how much he drank. Or noticing how little ambrosia and nectar he consumed. Or the time he had rolled on top of Dara in the dark and Dara hadn't been able to shake the feeling of someone else's hands off his body. They didn't have sex that night. Noam hadn't known what was wrong but he had gently held Dara close to his chest as he whispered reassurances into his hair all the same.

He was spending the afternoon at Ames's house. She was back from the war. Recapturing Greece was going well enough now that the troops didn't need constant divine intervention. She had told him about how the battles were going fine. The navy was becoming more and more important, so her dad had stepped in to help. Leaving her with more free time. And Taye to deal with one of the few people he genuinely couldn't stand. "One of the biggest threats is the alliance failing. You know, I'm fine with mainland Greece being free. The spartans want to stop there. I don't know if it is possible to keep the greek cities in Asia Minor out of Persia's grasp permanently. But Taye says that there's a way, so he wants to keep going."

Although Athens and Sparta hated each other, their patron gods got along great. Ames and Taye butted heads a lot when it came to war and strategy. Taye preferring to plan every move and prepare for every outcome. Ames liking the heat of the actual battle better.

When she was done explaining everything to him the conversation shifted to Noam. She had listened patiently when he told her about Noam's gifts and attention and she was looking at him with a smile. "What?" he asked. He knew that she had caught him.

She was silent for a moment. Then she smiled wider. "You never let anyone this close when you're done fucking them. You're in love with him."

"Yes." There was no point in denying it.

"For how long?"

"This is going to sound stupid, but from the moment we met."

Ames laughed loudly, "You didn't show it."

"No. I didn't know it back then but I think I was."

"You know, I think he loves you too." The smile dropped from her face. "How are you going to do it? With Lehrer and Sacha and all that." Dara stayed silent. "I know you're working with him, Dara. You disappear to the underworld more and more often. If I can figure it out, so has Lehrer." Dara looked at his feet. "This can't end well. Sacha isn't going to let you walk away. He doesn't care about you. He wouldn't let you go back to Lehrer if he did."

"I know he doesn't care, Ames. I'm a telepath."

"Then why do it?" Her expression was pained. She hated to see him involved in this, he knew it. But it was either trying to fight or try to kill himself again and he liked this more.

"Anything is better than Lehrer."

"Noam is not going to like it. And telling him is dangerous."

"I know. He's too stubborn for his own good."

"I think he loves you. But in his mind you are willing to overthrow a just king to let a monster sit on the throne. I don't know if he will choose you over his people."

"I know that! I know this can't last but this is the only good thing in my life besides you and I don't want to give it up!" he screamed. He breathed heavily. "I can't. I don't think I- When I'm with him I don't mind waking up in the morning as much. He makes me so happy, Ames." He was crying he realised. Ames carefully came closer. Touching his elbow and wrapping her arms around him when he didn't shrug her of. She rubbed circles into his back gently. "I don't know what to do. I don't know how to stop Lehrer." The admission felt horrible.

"I can help."

"No," he said immediately, "This is not going to end well. I need you uninvolved. Lehrer can't have a reason to kill you." Ames tried to protest but he slapped a hand over her mouth, "You need to be there for Bethany and Taye when everything is over. No matter what the outcome is, okay. If I something happens to me I need you to promise to try and protect Noam. I know it's nearly impossible to save that stupid boy but I need you to try. He's digging his own grave. I don't want Lehrer to ruin him like he-" Dara swallowed, "Promise to try."

"I promise." Ames didn't swear it. She never swore any oath on the river Styx. She hated her too much. But her eyes were earnest. "And you're not ruined, Dara." He laughed, but she gripped him tighter, "That's not funny, okay. We're fucked up but we aren't ruined. If you were ruined you wouldn't fight Lehrer." He didn't believe her but he didn't fight her on it. Fighting Ames was never a good idea. She liked winning too much to ever lose. "Now stop crying. You're going to look ugly when you see Noam. Although I don't think he will mind. You could be wearing fucking orange and he would think you're beautiful."

"I look good in orange. And you like it when I look ugly."

"Nobody looks good in orange, Dara. They are lying to you. And I do enjoy it when you look ugly. It makes me feel like I have a chance."

"At what?"

"Ever getting someone's attention when you are standing next to me."

"Ames, sweetie, that's never going to happen."

"Fuck you. I can dream," she laughed. Dara smiled back. Mind momentarily taken of the inevitable doom that was the coup. "Anyway, Taye has decided to take the night off. Apparently rebuilding the city is going well. And we're doing well enough in the war that they can miss me for a couple nights so we wanted to have dinner with everyone. You coming?"

"Sure."

* * *

Taye was a very laid back guy. It took a lot to make him genuinely angry but Noam had managed it somehow.

They had decided to have dinner at Dara's house. Bethany had arrived first, bouncing happily inside to ramble to Ames about a new book she had read. Taye had come a little later, immediately asking Dara for his best wine. He seemed determined to get at least a little drunk. Noam had been late, they had started without him already. He had been with Lehrer, plotting. Bonding. Dara didn't ask, so Noam wouldn't have to lie. He had gently cupped Dara's face between his hands. Swiping his thumbs under Dara's eyes. "What happened?"

Dara laughed lightly. "Don't worry about it. It's nothing."

Noam didn't seem to buy it. He gently kissed both of Dara's eyelids. "Did someone say something again? Who do I have to kill?" His voice was half joking half serious.

Dara laughed again. Standing on the tips of his toes to kiss Noam. "I don't want you to kill anybody."

Noam's hands slid down to his waist, Dara's hands resting on top of his arms. "I'm sure Leo would be fine with doing it. I don't like him but I do like that he'll keep assholes away from you."

"I already told you that you don't have to worry about Leo. I don't want to sleep with him and he's happy that I'm happy. No reason to get jealous"

"I know you wouldn't cheat, that's not it. And I'm not jealous. I just don't like him."

Dara raised his eyebrow at him. "Sure you do. Now come, the food is getting cold."

They finished dinner. Laying back and enjoying the wine when the conversation had shifted to Athens. It had started with Noam asking questions about how much influence Taye had on the city. There was nothing malicious about the question, Noam had lived in Athens his whole life, so being curious about the protector of the city was to be expected. 

"Oh, I can make them do anything if I want." His tone was light. Clearly he missed the darkening of Noam's eyes. Dara could feel the ever smouldering embers of Noam's righteous fury flare up.

"Anything?"

"Yes. I mean, we're like gods."

"Then why is there so much injustice in your city?" Noam's voice was sharp. 

Taye raised his eyebrows, "I invented the entire justice system. I invented democracy. I tried to make it fair. The political system is designed to stop one person from getting too much power. I'm not saying it's flawless, but it's pretty fair as far as justice goes. Almost anyone can participate."

"You're lying." The table fell still.

"I beg your pardon," Taye said. His body was still relaxed but his voice had lost some of it's warmth.

"Women, metics and slaves can't participate."

"No, they can't."

"That doesn't sound very fair to me."

"That is true," Taye admitted easily. "What is your point?"

"You're saying that you can make them do anything you want. Yet there's a lot of injustice. So either you don't care or you want it to be there."

"Careful with your words, Noam. I know a lot more than you. And I have my reasons."

"Explain them to me." Noam crossed his arms over his chest. Dara put a hand on his shoulder to try and calm him down. Taye pretended he was an airhead, but he was far stronger than he let on. Noam was powerful but young. And Taye was the god of wisdom and strategic war, Noam couldn't win from him yet.

"Alright. Just because I can do something, doesn't mean I should. I'm the protector of the city, not their tyrant. I can make them do as I say, but forcing people to act a certain way isn't something I desire to do. I want them to do it themselves. I can guide them, I do try. But I don't think breathing down their neck and forcing them to do as I like is the right thing to do. People have free will, Noam. I can't force them to be good."

"People are suffering because of that."

"I know." Taye looked tired. "People are always suffering in some way. It's never enough. I tried to micromanage them at first but it didn't go well. I wasn't freeing them, I was putting them in a cage. They got angry at the gods. Dangerously angry. I was forced to stop." Taye shrugged, "Sometimes you have to let things go. I try to convince them to do the right thing. Sometimes that works, sometimes not. You can't overthrow the entire system to rearrange it at will. People will suffer because of that too. I don't like slavery, and the metic system has gone too far. But what do you want me do to? Do you want me to descend from the heavens to punish them with death and destruction until they do as I say? It's not that simple, Noam. Believe me."

"So you're just going to turn your back onto the unwanted?"

"No. I try to better their situation. But humans are stubborn and greedy and selfish and it's fucking difficult! Alright!" Taye was starting to glow in anger. Noam tried to stand up but Dara pushed him back down. He shook his head. Noam seemed to calm down a little.

"Alright, alright, I didn't mean to sound so angry. I'm sorry."

Taye stopped glowing. Looking exhausted. "No, you're right. It's unfair. But I am trying. People change if they want to change, Noam. You can't force them. I mean, you can, but it won't last long if you do. Slavery is horrendous but I don't rule all of Greece, I can't force them to stop. And the metic system is something I try to adjust but it's delicate. And with the war there's a lot I have to do."

"I get it, man."

There was a long and awkward silence. 

"So how's working with my dad?" Ames piped up.

Taye immediately started groaning, "He is the worst person ever." Ames laughed and the conversation turned to how much of a dick her dad was. Noam was quiet again, thinking about what Ames had told him about her father. The disgust in his thoughts at the knowledge that this man was in charge of the sea, that he was one of Lehrer's closest friends was a tidal wave. Dara saw how he made up his mind to tell Lehrer. _Shit_.

Eventually everybody but Noam left. He was giving Dara a searching look. Coming closer to him to wrap him in his arms. Leaning down to kiss him. Dara almost forgot they were going to have an awful conversation. He broke the kiss, leaning his forehead against Noam's. "Talk."

"I want to tell Lehrer about Gordon Ames." _He already knows._

"I don't want you to do that."

"Why?"

"I'll handle it."

"Why haven't you handled it yet?" 

Dara gently pushed away from Noam, wanting space to think clearly. "I'm waiting for the right time."

Noam threw his hands up in frustration. "When is the right time, Dara?" 

"Soon! I can't just walk up to him and kill him!"

"You can't or you don't want to?" Noam asked coldly.

For a second Dara was afraid that he knew. But he didn't. He still thought it was a father-son relationship. Just like he thought everything with Lehrer was a father-son relationship. 

"You don't know anything, Álvaro."

"You never tell me anything."

"I do tell you. You never listen. I try and tell you about Lehrer."

"Do not give me that bullshit about not 'being able to' I'm done with it!" He made a cutting gesture with his hand and a bolt of lighting shot out. Dara flinched so hard away from it he almost fell over. It was stupid. Noam wouldn't hurt him, but the lighting was too familiar to bear. Noam immediately regretted it. "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that. Dara was already backing away. "It's alright."

"It's not alright!" His voice was shaking. He knew Noam didn't mean it. Hadn't meant to. But the lighting was too much like Lehrer's. It _was_ Lehrer's. Noam inherited that power when he was made immortal. It brought back memories of nights spent spasming on the ground as Lehrer stood over him, face impassive. But Noam wouldn't hurt him. He wasn't like Lehrer. _Wasn't he?_

No. He couldn't think like that. Noam was _good_. But even so. Noam was right. Dara could have killed Gordon already. Sacha wanted him gone. With him dead the sea would be powerless. Lehrer would either have to fill the position in himself or choose someone to do it for him. And there weren't many options right now. It would destabilise him. Not enough but Sacha was getting desperate.

Noam was still talking, "Okay, you're right. It's not. Dara, please talk to me."

"No, I need you to leave." So he could think clearly. So he could prepare himself for what he had to do.

"Baby-"

"I said go!" Noam hesitated, wanting to fight more. But he started walking in the direction of the door.

"If there's anything you need..." His voice trailed off. His eyes were hopeful, like he believed that Dara could stop being a wreck for five minutes.

"Leave." He forced himself to be cold, even though he wanted nothing more to burry himself into Noam's arms, into that beautiful mind, he couldn't. Any future with Noam was not an option as long as Lehrer was in power. Dara wouldn't be safe until Lehrer's head rolled. Noam wouldn't be safe until Lehrer's head rolled. And even with Lehrer gone Noam might decide he wanted someone whole, someone who ate regularly, who wasn't unreasonably afraid of lighting and who wanted to wake up in the morning

Noam left and Dara was alone again. That was fine, he was used to that.

Now, he just had to figure out how you killed a god. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look I know the sex is highly unrealistic but have you considered that this is fan fiction and I did tell you Haoma furthers sexual arousal. 
> 
> Heliotropes: eternal love
> 
> In the story Adalwolf was helios, titan of the sun. I'm not going to say anymore because I don't now how much I want to reveal in the story. 
> 
> Although I know the story of the Iliad I have not read it myself yet. I bought two books by greek writers and the first book was very sexist (yes even more sexist than greek mythology onto itself) and a had a very shallow look on the gods (Hera is a bitch, Ares is dumb, Aphrodite is stupid, Athena is good because she's a virgin, Artemis is also good bc she's a virgin but should chill out and let men look at her tits) so I never started on the second book which was the Iliad.
> 
> The Iliad was written down by Homer. He was not the one who wrote the story as the greek people told myths orally long before that. The story is about the trojan war. There are many interpretations of the story but I always liked the ones were Helen isn't a scheming bitch with no morals better.
> 
> The titans were the race in power before the gods were born. Kronos ate his kids, his wife fed him a rock instead of Zeus, Zeus grew up, freed his siblings and together they fought a long war. They won. The titans did not try to wipe out humanity and they aren't inherently evil. Some titans even sided with the gods. Styx being the first which is why all oaths must be sworn upon her.
> 
> The isle of the blessed is a paradise in the underworld where people who had gone to Elysium three times could live. If you managed to get into Elysium, which was the regular paradise, you could choose to be reborn. So the isle is like VIP paradise
> 
> Although soap existed the greeks probably didn't use it for a long time. Instead they mixed pumice, ashes and covered themselves with it. Then they smeared oil over it to scrape it of their bodies. This scraped away all the dirt too. Greeks were a big fan of baths once they figured out how to heat water. Most of the time these baths were communal (Dara has his own because he deserves it.) They also had a steam bath, like a sauna, so that's cool.  
> 


	7. Is a little lonely child

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which there's another strange lady and a lot of Gordon Ames and I'm sorry again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings  
> Rape  
> Uncanny people with foreign values  
> Gordon Ames. (Somehow it got worse than the other chapter. He's so bad, I can't believe my brain made this. Dear god.)  
> Murder  
> Noam and his pretty extreme morality and bad ideas about comforting people.  
> Drinking  
> I don't know how to feel about this but I've rewritten it 3 times and I'm tired of looking at it so here we go :)
> 
> I hope you feel the same dread I felt reading every chapter with Lehrer in it in the electric heir. I can only do very fluffy or nearly dead dove: do not eat content.  
> But we do get (sort of) VINDICATED (after a lot of pain)

His first step had been drinking so much ambrosia and nectar he was nauseous with it.

His second step had been finding adamant. It wasn't something you could just dig up but Gaia had always been fond of him. She had a complicated relationship with Lehrer, teaching him much of what he knew but also birthing most of his enemies. She had been fond of him ever since he was a toddler. He still remembered the first day he met her. Everything had been new, and he had missed home terribly. Everyone wanted to see him, or hold him or tell him how lucky he was that king Lehrer had rescued him. And they were all so loud, even when they weren't talking. Everyone except Lehrer. He didn't like tot think about those early days, when Lehrer still felt like being a father. He had been happy then, he thought they both were.

Lehrer had brought him to the sanctuary of Ge Kourotrophe near Athens. He waited there and Dara had been terribly confused, balanced on his hip and clutching his shoulder. After minutes the ground before the building had started to move, rising up in the shape of the upper half of a woman. She was gigantic and Dara had been utterly terrified. She had held out her hand and Lehrer had gently pried each of his little fingers off his chiton and whispered to him that he had to be good and everything would be alright.

He had fit easily on one palm as she brought him up to one giant eye to look at him. She had smiled then, strange and unnatural, like she half remembered someone doing it and tried to mimic the expression. Reaching up a hand to pet him carefully with one of her rock fingers. "You are one of mine."

He had shaken his head resolutely, "I am of Ahura Mazda."  
  
She had laughed, or done her version of it. The whole earth had shook with the sound and she had shaken her head in what he now knew was pity. "Not anymore, pebble. You are not Haoma anymore."

He had been confused, but she seemed wise and dangerous so he hadn't told her no. "What am I then?"

She shrugged, a house nearby collapsing like it was made of cards, "I suppose you're you."

He hadn't seen her after that. Not in a physical form anyway. She was different from his kind. Not interested in ruling or humans. She just was. But when they had met she had seemed friendly, a bit stilted as it became clear that she didn't really know much about how gods lived their daily lives. She tried, he didn't know what to make of that fact, but she did try. 

She was difficult to summon, sometimes she ignored even Lehrer. So he had no idea how to handle this.

He was standing in front of Ge Kourotrophe, the twisting wooden building ominous against the night sky. He took off his sandals and peplos and knelt before it. "I sing of mother Gaia. Of who rests beneath us daily. I seek you favour. Please, come. I need help."

Nothing happened but he didn't move. He pressed his brow harder against the earth, willing her to hear him, searching for her mind. It was difficult, he didn't know if she was abstract or simply too big to comprehend but he could feel her. And she finally took notice. The earth began to shift underneath him. Her head rose up first, she was much bigger than when he first met her, he wondered briefly if the first time was her version of making herself small.

The building was a crown, the spirals and twists resting easily her head. She rose no further than her collarbones, instead bringing a hand up from under him to bring him closer to her magma eyes.

"Pebble," she said pleased. Then her face twisted. He had never seen her angry before and he never wished to again. Everything that was even slightly soft about her face hardened into granite. Her skin cracked in some places and pulsing light started to flow out. "Why would you?"

He was suddenly very aware of the fact that nobody knew were he was. "Why would I what?"

"Your domain is life. You ARE life. Why?"

"I don't understand."

"Why would you attempt to die."

He didn't know how to answer that.

"Why?" Her voice was more vibration than sound, it was so low his teeth ached. She was terrifying.

He took a deep shuddering breath, "Lehrer hurts me." He hoped she believed him. Wouldn't call him a liar. Wouldn't relate this all back to Lehrer the first chance she got. "He has been hurting me for a long time. He hurts me badly. He- he-" Dara cut himself off. The words didn't come out. "There is a war going on, with the Persians. Are you aware of that?" She stayed silent. He wasn't sure whether she didn't know or just didn't care. "Well, because of it Lehrer wouldn't let me leave. I had to stay in his palace for a year. Where he could use me whenever he wanted to without respite. I couldn't take it anymore, so I tried to- tried to kill myself. I'm sorry." She was listening silently. Magma streamed down her cheeks. They looked almost like tears but he wasn't sure that she was crying. She didn't crush him into the ground. So that was a good sign.

"I need your help."

"For whom?"

"Sacha."

"No."

"Please. It's him or Lehrer."

"He is greedy. He takes from me and calls it his."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"He is almost human in his greed. Although I suppose dying is a very human thing. So it makes sense that he would be," she contemplated. She didn't look angry anymore, calm and a little absent as she tilted her head and considered him. "He takes from me, takes metal and stone and calls it wealth. Like those are more worth than the sand he walks on. It's strange, how they all believe that. It's all me in the end. Not that it matters much. I will have it back eventually." She was silent, as still as the cliffs behind her. "What does he want you to do?"

"I have to kill someone. Gordon Ames. I need your help."

"A god? The king of the sea. My child that is not easy."  
  
"Will you help me?"

She looked at him with her glowing eyes. "Yes," she said. Her voice was fond. "And then I will keep you."

"No!" He looked at her with wide eyes. "You can't keep me."

"Of course I can. You are one of mine. I always keep you. Calix won't take care of you, tries to kill you. You will be safe in my belly," she said, attempting to smile. He noticed she was careful to keep her mouth closed, baring teeth was a sign of aggression for most species after all.

"I will miss the stars." _And Noam._

"Yes, Uranus. You like him," she contemplated. "Keep you happy or keep you safe?" She craned her head back to look at her husband. Dara remembered that when he had laid hands on her children she had castrated him. If she did that to Lehrer at least some of his problems would be gone. "Why not both? You will stay with me for half the year and the other half you can see the stars."

"And if I say no?"

"You will have to do it alone." Her voice was not malicious. She would accept no and leave without complaint, it didn't truly matter to her in the end. He would let her keep him safe or he would die. She was like Lehrer in that way. Let him own you or be a disappointment. The difference was that she had no interest in keeping him captive. It was her version of caring.

"I agree." He had to force the words out.

"Good," she said pleased, "I will help you. You need adamant, yes?" She brought up another hand, a harpe lay in her palm. It was still glowing with heat. She blew on it to cool it down, uprooting several trees and leaving Dara clinging to one of the grooves in her finger. When she stoped with an apologetic look on her face Dara climbed over to her other hand to grab it. "This will kill him. You have to lure him on land, pebble. He will be weaker then."

"Thank you."

She tried to smile again, it looked slightly less strange. Then she sunk back into the earth, slowly falling apart until only her crown remained.

He looked down at the harpe, it was made entirely out of one material. The clear blade was razor sharp, it looked like a short sword with a hook bending away from the blade. He strapped it to his lower leg, concealing it with glamour. It would have to do.

* * *

The first time they had sex he had been bathing.

He'd walked into the sea in another desperate attempt to get rid of Lehrer's touch. Drinking hadn't worked and bathing had never made him feel less sick but he still tried.

He had sunken deep into thought, he didn't do that often anymore. His own head was as traitorous as Lehrer's silver tongue. He hadn't noticed the presence behind him until two arms grabbed him around the waist. It had scared him enough to try and call Lehrer, he was halfway through 'Calix' when his head disappeared under the waves. He had gasped in the sea water and struggled against the power that was suddenly surrounding him, more and more panicked by the second, until a low voice had chuckled in his ear. "It's just me, Dara. There's no need to be afraid."

He had stopped to turn around, confused. "Where are you taking me?"

"Somewhere we can be alone," Gordon Ames said gently. Dara knew what he wanted. What he had wanted for years now. He didn't fight him, remained still as he was laid down on the ocean floor. Didn't say no. He let the man fuck him. The god wasn't rough. Being thorough with opening him up, chuckling about Dara clearly not being a virgin when he took it easily. His hands did a better job at getting rid of Lehrer than the water had. Dara liked that.

Afterwards the man had kissed him deeply. "Did you enjoy it?"

Did he? He didn't feel good but he also didn't feel like Lehrer's anymore. "Yes," he decided.

"When can I see you again?"

Dara had made himself smile shyly, it made him look younger, more innocent than he was. Gordon liked it when he did that. "We'll see."

He had grinned at Dara. Satisfied at his conquest. "I should have grabbed you sooner. I wanted to be your first. But maybe it's nicer to have you when someone already broke you in. Have you been with many men?" Dara shook his head and his grin widened, pleased, "Truly? I'm surprised. Pretty thing like you. Lehrer must have a difficult time beating the suitors away from you. I was impressed with myself that I could wait this long. If your father wasn't one of my closest friends I would have taken you long ago. If you were mortal I would have carried you of to keep you to myself but alas, I have to let you leave again. Next time I will get you something nice, I promise."

He had brought Dara back up to the surface. Dara had gone home, when he arrived his hair was still wet and he'd smelled of the sea. Lehrer had taken one look at him and figured out what happened. "Who was it?" He didn't seem upset, more amused than anything. Already knowing the answer but wanting to hear Dara say it.

Dara hesitated, would he be mad to hear it was his friend? Would he care at all? "Gordon Ames."

Lehrer had laughed, hard and cruel, and called him a whore.

He hadn't mentioned it again. Didn't seem to care about the fact that Dara slept with another king at all. But the next time he came to Dara's bed his eyes were furious as he closed his hands around Dara's throat till he almost passed out. Lehrer had left him gasping and bleeding on the sheets. It had felt like victory, in a way.

Gordon Ames kept his promise and gifted him an elaborate pearl necklace. It wrapped around his neck in a lace pattern, bigger pearls hanging off it to drape over his collarbones and the nape of his neck. They had fucked with him wearing only that. The white of the pears contrasted nicely against the bruises adorning his neck.

He still had that necklace.

He walked into the sea. Standing submerged up to his thighs at a beach were he and Gordon often met. His aura was familiar enough to Gordon to hopefully be recognised and lure him in. Dara was powerful enough that he should be noticed when he crossed Gordon's domain.

It worked. The man rose from the water to grab Dara's waist, drawing him in to kiss him deeply. Dara kissed back, didn't react as he felt his hands let go of his waist to slide up his body. Something cool was fastened around his neck. He broke the kiss to look down and see the strings of black pearls decorating him. He smiled, "It's beautiful."

The man looked pleased, "I thought you might like it."

"Oh, I love it."

The lord hummed, satisfied. He grabbed Dara's waist again, preparing to take off. Dara drew back quickly. "No, I don't want to do that."

Gordon quirked an eyebrow, "Right here then. Eager little thing that you are." He tried to kiss Dara again but was rebuffed for a second time.

"Not here either. I want to take you somewhere. If that's okay." He fluttered his lashes.

"Why not here? I have a busy schedule you know. And as much as I love to have you I unfortunately can't cancel everything, Dara," he said, one of his hands sliding back to roughly palm Dara's ass.

"Oh, please! For me. It won't take long, I promise." Dara stared up at him pleadingly. Then he averted his eyes, pretending to be bashful. "It's a surprise. I want to try something new. But it can't happen here." 

The man looked a little intrigued but not entirely swayed. Rubbing circles into Dara's hipbones with his thumbs. "You've ignored me for weeks now. I think I get to decide where we go. See it as a way to make it up to me." He gave Dara a patient smile.

Dara placed a hand on his chest, playing with the edge of his chiton. "I prepared this to make it up to you. Plus, it's something I've wanted to try for a really long time." The man was still unconvinced so Dara leaned against him, pressing kisses up his neck until he reached his ear, softly biting his earlobe. "I will take the aphrodisiac next time." The man hesitated so Dara threw in the only thing he could think of, "I- I'll call you that thing you want me to call you."

Gordon took in a sharp breath. It was the only thing Dara had said no to and kept saying no to. Even after nagging, and soft words, and piles of expensive gifts he had refused. The god tangled his fingers in his hair to pull him back. Looking at him with dilated pupils. "Do it right now and I'll go with you," he said with a husky voice.

Dara forced himself to smile coyly, swallowing the bile down to open his mouth, "Daddy."

The lord actually moaned. His hand tightened in Dara's curls, crushing some of the flowers there. "Say it again," he hissed. He was rock hard against Dara's leg.

Dara shook his head. Hoping the disgust didn't show on his face. "You have to go with me first," he singsonged.

The lord laughed. "You are a vixen. Fine, let's go. But make it quick, I can barely wait to have you on my cock."

Throwing up would ruin the entire plan he reminded himself as he fought down the nausea. He led them further land inwards. Away from Gordon's power source and into his own. He had picked a place that was solitary, no one would hear him scream. If he managed to scream at all. Dara shuddered and it was, again, mistaken for arousal.

"All excited already? Don't worry, baby. I'll-"

"Don't call me that!" Dara was so angry he could have slapped him. He didn't. Gordon was taken aback. _That's right. I am dangerous, asshole_. He forced himself to relax. "I like 'little one' better." The man searched his face. Dara held his breath. _Don't suspect anything, don't suspect anything, please, please, please-_

But he just nodded and gestured for Dara to lead the way. They kept walking, until Dara was sure that the ocean was far enough away. There were no rivers near this place and he kept the nymphs asleep with his powers. No one would interrupt. 

"Here?" Gordon asked.

Dara gave him a winning smile, "Yes."

The man looked around confused. "What's the surprise?"

"Just lay down. I'll show it to you."

"Alright, but you better make this worth my time," he teased with a smirk. He looked a bit like Ames when he did that. He laid down on the yellowing grass, Dara straddled him quickly. Putting one hand on his shoulder as the other slid down to his leg where he had strapped the harpe. Gordon's hands were already undoing his peplos. Dara gently untied the weapon, being careful not to let the stone make a sound against the leather.

"It will be," he promised in a low voice.

Then he stabbed the man in the throat.

It took a second for him to react. Then his eyes went wide, hands letting go of Dara to reach up to the wound in his throat. Ichor was already spurting out of him. Dara didn't let him recover, gathering his power and drawing from Gaia's to wrenching the harpe out to bring it down again and again and again. The man tried to scream but the only thing that had came out were choking sounds. The sea was too far away to help him, Gaia surrounding him with her presence, not letting him draw any power to himself. Dara didn't know when he had stopped moving, but he was still now.

He shuddered, breathing heavily. He was covered In ichor. He could feel the cooling splatters on his face and neck, his hands were covered in it. He had to act quickly. Had leave before they found the body. He cleaned himself shakily. He had to go. Had to get away from the lord and his wide, staring eyes.

It was the right thing to do. Lehrer needed to be destabilised. It would buy him a little more time. He had hurt Ames. He deserved it. _He deserved it_. Dara didn't know why he was so upset, he had killed people before, he should be used to it by now. _They didn't trust you. You didn't know them. Killing them didn't leave your best friend an orphan._ The voice sounded like Lehrer again, always so softly accusing.

Noam thought he should die. Dara clung to that thought. Noam was a good person. He thought the man deserved it. So maybe this was the right thing. Maybe Dara had done the right thing for once. Ames would be fine. Ames hated her father, she would maybe even be happy. She wouldn't hate Dara. She wouldn't.

He walked (not running, running is suspicious) casting the disguise of a small dryad around himself, just to be safe. He travelled quickly to Olympus, switching from the dryad to a satyr. Sticking to the shadows and darting into his home. He went to bed, pulling the covers over himself and pretended that he didn't exist.

* * *

News spread quickly.

He could hear the people outside, all buzzing with energy. _A god is dead. A god is dead._

It hadn't happened since the war. Sometimes gods faded, or melted together, or were overtaken by another culture. But murdered? That was news. 

Dara shut his eyes tightly. Pretending they weren't there. Trying to go back to sleep. Trying to believe that yesterday didn't happen.

Noam came to put an end to that. He knocked on the door and when Dara didn't open he used his key to let himself inside. "Dara?" Dara didn't answer. Hoping he would leave. Noam was happy, Noam was ecstatic that Gordon Ames was gone. It was too much. He felt the bed dip where Noam sat down. "Dara I have to tell you something."

Dara burrowed deeper into the sheets, "It can wait."

"No, I don't think it can." Noam sounded like he was sorry. Thinking about the bags under Dara's eyes, how he stayed up reading long after Noam had gone to sleep.

"Okay." Dara sat up to look at Noam with tired eyes, "What is it?"

"Gordon Ames is dead." Noam tried to sound earnest but a bit of glee danced through his tone.

Dara sucked in a shaky breath, "How did it happen?"

"He was stabbed 16 times. It must have been with a divine weapon. Or another god, Persian maybe. Not many things can kill a god of his caliber." Noam sounded amazed, relieved even. "Dara?" He gently brought a hand to Dara's face, wiping away the tears that were rolling down his cheeks. As soon as his hand touched Dara's skin he broke. Crumbling into Noam's chest, sobbing so hard it hurt. ' _Oh gods, it can't have been him._ ' The thought swept through Noam's head like a sword.

Dara cried harder. Noam gently held him closer, tucking Dara's head under his chin. Whispering empty reassurances in his hair. His hands gently stroking Dara's heaving shoulders. They stayed there until Dara's wailing had tapered off. Noam went to move one of his hands up to his hair but paused it when his fingers caught onto the pearls still hanging around Dara's neck. He gently moved Dara back so he could look at him. Gathering the necklace in one hand. "Where did you get this?"

Dara sighed, "Figure it out."

"You needn't be crying. He deserved it. You did a good thing," Noam said, as fervent in his justice as always.

"Noam, please." Dara undid the pearls with shaking hands, looking at them brought a new wave of tears.

"Dara," Noam hesitated, unsure how to ask his question, "These are not very cheap." Dara didn't say anything. Just kept staring at the pearls. "Was he courting you?"

Dara looked up and laughed despite the situation, the laughter choked in his throat and turned into new sobs, "Don't be ridiculous. It wasn't courtship. We just fucked sometimes."

Noam's eyes were earnest, mouth trying to find a way to ask the right question. "This is not a recent thing, is it?" _Please, let it be a couple of weeks._ _How old were you?_

"The first time I was fifteen." 

"That's rape." Noam tried to hold him again but Dara recoiled harshly, shaking his head.

"No, it wasn't," he said, "I know what that is. I consented to it."

"You can't consent at that age. He hurt you. I think you know that." _Sixteen times._

"No, I liked it. I loved it even. I know what that is and I _choose_ to sleep with him."

"Dara," Gods he loved how Noam said his name but today it only made him angrier, "You were fifteen."

 _At least he waited longer than Lehrer did._ "Noam listen to me. I didn't say no, I didn't struggle, I went to see him again. That's not- It's not- it was just sex."

Noam still wasn't convinced, chewing on his bottom lip, "Do you think he would have listened if you said no?"

Dara stared at him with wide eyes, "I- that doesn't matter because I didn't say no. I wanted it."

But Noam didn't relent. Never relented. Couldn't let anything go for five fucking seconds and let Dara live in peace. "Dara, not struggling does not exactly indicate that it was a situation that you were expecting and consenting to. Did you not struggle because you wanted it or because it didn't matter?"

 _Because I froze up and didn't know what to do._ The thought brought new tears to his eyes, he pretended they were angry ones. "You don't know shit, Álvaro. You don't know anything. You're just saying all this because you can't stand the thought of me having sex with someone who knows what they are doing. Someone with whom I actually enjoy it." That stung. But not enough to distract Noam from his train of thought.

"Gordon Ames raped you."

"No. Shut up!" Dara squeezed his eyes shut and fisted his hands in his hair, pulling it harshly. Like the pain would drown out the words. His breath was coming quickly. Noam was talking to him gently. Reminding him to take deep breaths. He looked a mess. With red rimmed eyes and messy hair, trying not to have a full blown panic attack. He looked unstable. Crazy.

"Did you tell anyone? Does Lehrer know?" Lehrer. Always Lehrer. Dara wanted to scream at Noam that Lehrer knew and didn't care. That if anything Lehrer had raped him. Not Gordon. But Noam couldn't know that.

"He wouldn't care! He would just laugh at me." Dara wasn't sure if he was still crying.

"You have to tell someone." Noam was always so earnest. 

"You know."

Noam hesitated, "Someone else." Dara didn't say anything. He brought his knees up to his chest to wrap his arms around them. He could hear Noam contemplating whether leaving him alone was a good idea. "Do you want me to go?"

"Yes."

"Is it okay if I stay in the living room?" Less Dara would do another crazy thing, kill someone else, hurt himself. _He thinks I'm dangerous._

Dara hugged his knees tighter to his chest. "Fine." 

Noam reached a hand to him, pausing when Dara flinched back. "I just need the pearls, Dara. We can't have anyone think that you had a motive. Do you have anymore?"

Dara nodded shakily. Getting up to walk to his jewellery cabinet and opening the doors. Carefully picking out all of Gordon's gifts. Most of them were made of pearls, some of diamonds or gold. Noam was looking, astounded, at the sheer volume of jewellery that Dara possessed. A warm curl of pride flitting through his stomach when he saw his own gifts carefully stored at the centre.

"Here." Dara didn't look at him. Thrusting out his fist to Noam. Noam carefully gathered all the necklaces, bracelets and rings in his hands.

"I'll destroy them. That way there isn't any connection between you and him, okay?" Noam said gently. Afraid that anything above a low volume would shatter Dara again.

"Yes," Dara bit out. Noam gave him one last look- hoping he would change his mind- and left, gently closing the door behind him. Dara climbed back onto the bed, staring listlessly at the ceiling. Counting out truths like coins in his palm. Gordon Ames was dead. Dara was the one who killed him. He had chosen to sleep with him. The alternative was unthinkable. That meant that Dara had let it happen twice. He was the common factor in both narratives. Maybe it wasn't entirely Lehrer's fault then. If Dara made it so damn easy-

His thoughts were interrupted by a hesitant knock on the door. Noam peeked his head inside. "Sorry, I wanted to ask if it was alright if I lend a book."

Dara sat up on his knees. "Can you come here?"

Noam immediately stepped into the room. Worry permeating his mind. Slowly approaching the bed, not wanting to spook Dara further. He was such a knight in shining armour, always wanting to protect Dara- from Gordon, from _himself_ \- but too blind to see that he was only dragging both of them directly into the jaws of the monster. When Dara didn't voice any protest and didn't flinch away Noam sat down on the edge of the bed, careful not to touch Dara anywhere. "What do you need, baby."

Dara gazed into those lovely, lovely eyes of his for a couple of seconds. Then he surged forward. Grasping Noam's face and pressing his lips against his. Trying to lose himself into Noam's warmth. For a moment he thought Noam would accept it. But then he gently pushed Dara away, shaking his head, "No, sweetheart. You're still in shock."

"I'm fine," Dara insisted.

"I don't think you are." Noam's eyes were earnest. And Dara suddenly felt his heart drop to his stomach. 

"I thought you wanted me." Maybe asking him to love a murderer was too much.

"I do. But not when you're like this. You're upset." Noam leaned forward to kiss his forehead. Dara's hands grasped the front of his chiton to keep him close. Breathing in his scent. Noam tentatively started caressing his hair, pressing his lips against Dara's forehead again. "Try to rest, Dara."

He left Dara alone in his room, and later he left Dara alone in the house when he went to one of the secret meetings that he and Lehrer were so fond of having nowadays.

* * *

The funeral was long. Longer than it had any right to be. Ames looked a mess. Her eyes went wide with relief when she saw him. He hugged her tightly and tried not to feel guilty as she shook slightly in his hold.

Lehrer's eyes were boring into the back of his neck the slow anger palpable in them. A heavy weight that was slowly repressing his lungs. So he had read Noam's mind. Maybe Dara had finally crossed one line too far and this would be the end. He wondered briefly what would become of Noam. Would he realise something was off about Lehrer? Or would he get dragged further and further into Lehrer's twisted worldview until there was nothing left of all that which made him Noam? Dara wouldn't get to see it either way. He hoped that Noam would be better than Lehrer. Hoped that he would find someone after Dara. Maybe he was thinking too highly of himself. Noam was sixteen after all. A love he knew for eight months, two of which were spent exchanging disdainful looks, wasn't all that important in a human life, let alone a divine one. 

Noam had snuck off to Ames seniors rooms to see if there was anything that could point to Dara being the murderer. He wouldn't find anything, they were always careful. Yes, Dara got a lot of jewellery from the man but most of that had been in secret. Or disguised as a gift to the beloved son he didn't have anymore.

Eventually the whole thing was done. Ames uncle offered to stay with her but she had declined and decided to go back to Dara's house. As soon as they arrived she grabbed the biggest bottle of liquor that he owned and started drinking. When it was empty Dara managed to coax her into bed. Putting a bowl on the ground and throwing the sheets over her, like she had so often done for him. After a moment of hesitation he put his arm around her and pressed his chest against her back. "Is this okay?" he whispered. She nodded and intertwined her fingers with his. He didn't sleep, neither did Ames. When he sat up to look at her in the morning her eyes were red.

They didn't eat breakfast. Dara skipped breakfast most of the time and Ames just stared listlessly at the food he put in front of her. So instead he took her to the bath. Helping her strip and gently washing her hair. She didn't complain about the warmth of the bath, resting her head on her knees as she stared at the water. She hadn't said a word to him yet. Hadn't thought anything at him either. He didn't think the fact that her father was murdered had really sunk in yet. Still processing the funeral and Lehrer's little interrogation. He wondered if she would cry for him. If she did she would be angry about it, that was for certain. He lend her some of his clothes and she took them without complaint.

Bethany came over after breakfast to check up on Ames. They curled up on the couch together, Bethany braiding her hair and murmuring soft words against Ames's back. When she left Ames started drinking again. Around midday she went back to bed. He followed her to his room to tuck her in again. When he carefully laid the sheets over her still form again she suddenly spoke. "Do you think they will find the murderer?"

He bit his lip. "Maybe."

She shifted her eyes to look at him before shutting them tightly. "I need to be alone."

"Of course." He gave her a sad smile. Bending down to kiss her forehead before slipping out of the room.

He leaned against the wall and sighed. He poured himself a generous glass of wine, wondering where Noam had gone. He hadn't found any evidence because Dara wasn't stupid. And he had left with Lehrer to fail one of Lehrer's little loyalty tests. Dara hadn't seen him since. He lounged on the couch, trying not to get drunk in case Ames needed him. 

Noam was knocking at his door when the sun went down. Thoughts an angry, confused mess. Debating with himself about Dara. If Dara was a traitor.

So Lehrer had told him then.

This was going end painfully. Dara almost laughed as he got up and opened the door. He didn't know why he was surprised.

This outcome had always been inevitable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Adamant was probably diamond. It was used to describe diamond or some kind of metal, basically a synonym for hard substance. Cronus castrated his father with a Harpe, sickle or scythe (different descriptions are given) made from adamant, that Gaia gifted him.  
> In the story it's a magical diamond like stone that is able to kill gods (although other steps have to be taken) I didn't make it normal diamond because then everybody could kill everybody and the stakes wouldn't be very high. Gods aren't allowed to have it, obviously, but Gaia doesn't care about law.
> 
> Ge Kourotrophe is one of the 3 sites of worship for Gaia we know for certain existed. The only description I could find is that it was a wooden building and there was a priestess. 
> 
> Gaia is one of the oldest deities that existed in greek mythology. She arose out of Chaos so she was the second thing ever to exist. So she's kind of odd. She is the personification of earth and the mother of both Uranus (yes her husband) and the titans. (The chant that Dara uses to call her is made up but based on homeric hymns)
> 
> In mythology gods can die, though most of the time they are imprisoned in tartarus instead of dead. The only god that actually died is Pan. But this might have been a hilarious misunderstanding where I sailor named Thamus misheard someone saying "All great tammuz is dead" as "Thamus, the great god Pan is dead." In greek those things sound familiar apparently. People still visited temples and shrines of Pan so we don't really know how dead he was in the eyes of the public.
> 
> In the story gods can technically die by being forgotten or cast down by their worshippers (one of the reasons Taye had to step back) if a culture or country is overtaken and the conquerers force or convince the people to convert to their religion the original gods can die or be weakened enough to be killed. 
> 
> They had locks in Ancient Greece, although simple ones. Mostly padlocks but I think Dara giving Noam the key to his house after three days of dating is cute. 
> 
> Funerals in Ancient Greece were a big affair. One of the rituals was that the female relatives had to wash and bind any wounds the dead person had. So Ames is kinda upset. Like I know she hated her dad but mourning is weird and having to take care of you father's stabbed to dead body is tough for anyone let alone a newly orphaned seventeen year old.
> 
> I don't know how Dara and General Ames started in fever wake so I based the story on all those classic rape myths the greeks where so fond of. Girl gets abducted --> girl gets raped --> demigod is born.  
> Most of the time it's either Zeus or Poseidon doing it so that fits.
> 
> By the way there was a kind of system in Ancient Greece where you had an older male have a mentorship/sexual relationship with a teenager. That doesn't exist here, because it's gross. And Lehrer would have loved that and he doesn't deserve nice things.


	8. Lost in Hell, -Persephone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God this hurt to write  
> WARNINGS  
> Lehrer  
> Abuse  
> Desire to self harm/commit suicide  
> Light sef harm (scratches specifically)  
> LEHRER  
> Gaslighting  
> Victim blaming  
> Imprisonment  
> Blackmailing  
> Rape  
> L E H R E R  
> Me and my strong desire to hurt all of us.

The first thing he noticed when he opened the door was that Noam's hair was a mess. It was a stupid detail to notice because Noam's hair was always a mess. But now it looked worse somehow. Like he had been running his hands through it non- stop.

"Dara," he choked out. Voice ragged. Desperate.

Begging.

"Not here. Ames is sleeping," Dara said. Another lie, he could hear her thoughts slowly grinding against each other. He felt guilty again, thinking of the harpe he had hidden under the bath tiles. But he didn't want to have this conversation were she could overhear. He briskly threw a shawl over his shoulders and started walking off Olympus. Noam following closely behind, eyes dazed and desperate at the same time.

"Baby." Gods that hurt. Noam took two quick steps to catch up to him. He grabbed his hand tightly.

"Not. Here." Dara led them away from everyone. Away from Olympus to a remote field with trees that would obscure them. He stood with his back to Noam, wrapping the shawl tighter around his shoulders and taking in a deep breath. He was not going to cry about this, damnit.

"Dara," Noam pleaded.

"What do you want?" Dara bit out. He sounded mean, even to his own ears.

"Lehrer told me something." Noam swallowed hard. "He said that he suspected you might be working for Sacha. Is that true?" 

Dara turned around slowly. Noam stood as tense as a bow string, fist balled so tightly his nails were cutting in his flesh. The regret must have shown on his face because Noam staggered back, face wrenched in pain. "Noam-"

"No," Noam interrupted him, "No, no, no. You wouldn't."

"I have." He thought this would hurt more but he felt strangely numb.

"How could you?" Noam sounded wrecked. All their moments together flitted through his mind: the first time they kissed, the first time they slept together, Dara curling up in his lap to sleep, Dara sighing whenever Noam kissed the spot under his ear, Dara explaining the stars to him. _All a lie._

"None of it was a lie," Dara said before he could stop himself. Noam's thoughts paused for a moment before resuming at an even faster pace. Finally braiding all the threads together. _You can read my mind._ It didn't matter, not really, Noam would have figured it out sooner or later anyway, but the gut wrenching betrayal in his eyes nearly brought tears to Dara's own. 

"You know I'm working with Lehrer," Noam said, slow and steady. Voice hiding the rising panic in his mind. 

"Yes," Dara whispered.

_He knows everything. As soon as he gets near Lehrer-_

"I can't read Lehrer's mind," Dara interrupted Noam's thought process.

"Why not?" Noam was still distraught. Thoughts scattering like fireflies.

 _Because he has telepathy too you stupid, naive, beautiful boy._ "I don't know. I guess when you're as old as he is you learn some tricks," came out instead. "Listen to me, Noam. I know you're not going to believe me but Sacha is the better option here."  
  
"The better option!" Disbelieve and rage spread through Noam's voice like blood in the water. "He had people killed! Thousands of them! Just so he would have more power, so he could beat Lehrer! He is not the better option."

"You don't know anything about Lehrer Noam. You don't know him like I do, this isn't some whimsical teenage rebellion thing. Children don't turn against their father for no reason. He's bad. He's worse than you could ever imagine. You saw it, you saw the bird. It's only a fraction of what he does to me. Noam, please." _Please believe me._

"Lehrer doesn't kill innocent people for power." Noam wasn't going to change his mind. Even though he knew that wasn't true. Not now he distrusted everything that came out of Dara's mouth. Not when Lehrer could have used his power a thousand times to twist Noam's mind into spirals.

"He does. He has. He is the king of the gods, every plague and whimsical kill and rape is on his head. He deliberately started the conflict with the Persians. He's the reason you almost died. He's the reason your father died."

"He's in a difficult position. The gods themselves are responsible for their own actions. And Persia invaded us." He turned sharply, like the image of Dara hurt him, and started to walk away. Dara following closely.

"Noam you don't see it yet but you are in danger. He's going to hurt you. He's a manipulator."

"Less than you are I'm sure."

"Do you really think he needed the help of a teenager to stop a coup? You're not dumb enough to believe that." He sounded desperate, he was desperate. Begging Noam not to leave him.

"I was dumb enough to believe that you had feelings for me."

"None of that was a lie! I know you don't believe me but it was real. Noam, I love you."

Noam finally stopped walking. He let out a bitter laugh. "You love me." It sounded flat.

"Yes, I do. I know you. Really know you. And I love you."

"What are you gonna say next? You've never felt this way before? That I'm special? That I'm the one?"

Dara tried to blink back tears. "I think you might be."

Noam laughed again, it almost sounded like sobbing. "You're funny. I'm not stupid enough to keep believing you, Dara. And even if you did love me." He walked closer, gently cupping Dara's face, thumb wiping away a stray tear that had managed to escape. "I don't care." Then he left.

It was a lie. Dara was fully aware of that fact but it didn't hurt any less. 

He stood there for a long time. Watching the stars and pretending he wasn't crying when he heard a hesitant voice ask, "Are you alright?"

He turned to see Raphael, long robes nearly dragging over the floor. "I'm fine," he tried to sound haughty but it came out as choked up with tears.

"You don't sound fine." He fiddled with his fingers. "Is it a boy?"

He laughed surprised, wiping his face dry with a hand. "How do you figure that?"

He shrugged hesitantly, "I was young once." Flitting thoughts of Adalwolf and his dangerous grin shot through his mind before he carefully pressed them down again. Raphael was complicated. He was just as devoted to Adalwolf as Lehrer was. He wanted to bring him back, but he still wasn't sure whether that desire was his own or if Lehrer had talked it into his head. He liked Dara well enough but was always tried to be distant with him. Careful after what had become of Lehrer.

Dara tugged on his curls. "Did Lehrer call you?" 

Raphael smiled wryly, "Who else?"

Dara bit his cheek. "Are we going to have to try again?"

Raphael sighed, he looked old. Dara didn't know if that was a choice, most gods preferred to look on the younger side. But Raphael had grey streaks in his shoulder length hair and laugh lines around his mouth. Dara always thought it made him look kind. Much kinder than Lehrer and his perfect stone sculpted face and wrong eyes. "Probably. It's one of the only reasons he calls me here. I'm sorry. I know you hate it." Memories of Dara, still wide eyed and trusting, crying over a dead blackbird that was beating itself against the bars of a cage. Lehrer standing over him, impassive. Like nothing had happened. He had said, _cause and effect_. And Raphael hadn't done anything. Not after the first time when Dara had been ten and Lehrer had broken his arm in three places just to prove he could.

"It isn't your fault." Dara shifted his feet. "We're probably going to see a lot more of each other."

Raphael tilted his head, lowering his voice, as if he was afraid he would scare Dara if he talked any louder. "What happened?" He always looked gentle when he used that voice. Forgetting to put up a wall between them in moments like this. His true heart shone through sometimes. Sitting Dara in has lap to heal his scraped knees when he was six. Humming a song to him until his sniffles died down. Raphael wasn't a very good singer but his voice was warm all the same. Teaching Dara about herbs and how you could use them with an ever patient smile. Helping him come up with new wishes for falling stars. Dara was grateful that he had made attempts to shield him from Lehrer, for all the good that it did. He didn't know if Raphael knew that Lehrer did anything besides hitting. He didn't want to find out.

"Doesn't matter." Dara forced himself to smile.

"Maybe I can help you."

"Since when?" The words flew out of him before he could stop himself. Raphael visibly flinched.

"Right." He carded a rough hand through his hair. "I should go."

"See you." Dara waved halfheartedly at him. Raphael gave him one last searching look before he resumed his path in the direction of Olympus.

Dara kept standing in place, watching the stars roll by. He started walking back at some point. He didn't know how long he was standing there, it didn't matter either way. He walked up the marble steps to Olympus slowly. Joints aching under his own weight. He had anticipated the four guards waiting for him but that didn't make their presence any less jarring. It was too late to run now.

"My lord, I'm afraid you have to go with us." 

Dara hung his head, smiling dryly at the marble beneath him. He nodded his head and let them escort him away.

They pushed him into Lehrer's office where he met Noam's shaken eyes. Surprised to see him. So he hadn't told Lehrer yet. Hadn't been planning on telling him either.

"Dara," Lehrer said, chin resting on intertwined fingers, voice soothing as honey, "There you are." He was enjoying this. His eyes lit up with triumph at the knowledge that they were at his mercy. Taking voyeuristic pleasure in the fact that both of them could read Noam's mind and he was none the wiser.

"What's he doing here?" Noam was panicking. _He knows. He knows. He knows._ It felt good to know that Noam didn't want to sign his dead warrant yet. Didn't want to but had anyway.

"Can't I simply want to see my own child?" Lehrer arched one elegant eyebrow. Drawing out the kill. He didn't have the luxury of playing with his food often after all.

"I mean, yes but you thought maybe- you know."

"Ah, yes. That unfortunate little fact." Lehrer leaned back in his chair. "There's no need to worry, Dara. We know your little secret." He smiled serenely sounding like he was talking about an inside joke instead of treason.

"And you're doing me the honour of killing me yourself, how generous." Dara's nails were cutting into his palm but his voice didn't shake.

Lehrer's face twisted carefully in a pitying expression. "Flower, of course not. I'm your father, do you really think I could hurt you?"

"When have you ever done anything else?" Dara forced the words out through his clenched jaw.

Lehrer's face fell dejectedly. Gods, he was a good liar, even Dara almost believed he was heartbroken over that declaration. He slowly pushed his chair back to stand up. "I only want what's best for you. Do you think I am unaffected when seeing you like this?"

Dara stilled. Like what? Noam was confused too. There was a gleam in Lehrer's eyes that he didn't like. The look of a man who's prey had been driven in a corner so he could savor the kill. His movements slow and precise as he walked around the desk. Holding a calming hand in front of him as he moved closer.

"I know it wasn't easy," Lehrer went on, "And I'm sorry I didn't notice before but I am here for you now."

"What in Gaia's name are you talking about?" The goddess couldn't save him but her name made him feel a little stronger anyway.

Lehrer sighed again, "Haoma."  
  
_What?_

Lehrer went on, "The proximities to the Persians must have awakened the spirit within you. Being a hybrid was always a risk but I thought you would be safe. Truly." Noam's mouth had fallen open, Dara's might have too. Lehrer went on unbothered, "It's alright, Dara. You weren't in control of your own actions. You won't be blamed for theirs. We might even be able to help you."

"No." But Noam was already looking at Lehrer with grateful eyes, everything making perfect sense to him. Helping Sacha, committing treason, destabilising the greek monarchy. No wonder that Dara had acted so moody, he was merely a puppet. He was innocent.

"No," he said again as Lehrer snatched any trust in Dara that Noam might have had away. It was a perfectly logical. And it was so, so fortunate that Lehrer had figured it out in time. That Lehrer was going to help him get better.

"No," he whispered, shaking his head desperately, "Noam, he's lying." But it was to no avail, the explanation had already buried itself into Noam's mind. Had Lehrer used his power on him. Had he needed to? "Noam, please."

"Noam," Lehrer said. Commanded. Noam stood up, bowing quickly to Lehrer before turning to Dara.

"Hey, it's okay," he soothed, "I'm sorry for getting angry at you. I shouldn't have been so harsh."

Dara stepped back against the door. "Don't touch me."

Noam's face was pained, but he kept moving forward, always doing the right thing. "I'm sorry but this is necessary. It will only be until you get better. I promise."

Then he surged forward. Grabbing both of Dara's wrists. Dara pushed him away harshly, bringing up a leg to knee him in the stomach when a bolt of lightning hit him. Lehrer's magic forcing him to go limp and he fell forward into Noam's chest. Still trying to hit him, to squirm away but he just held Dara close, whispering, "It's alright, baby. You're gonna be okay." in his ear until the fight left him and he stopped moving. Breathing raggedly against Noam's chest as he slowly released his hold. Wrapping one arm tight around his waist and coiling some of Dara's curls around his fingers with the other as he pressed a kiss against his temple. "I love you too."

Dara started crying. Big, ugly sobs wracking his frame. He couldn't seem to stop the tears, not matter how much he tried. Lehrer's satisfied gaze only making it worse. Noam kept murmuring into his ear as he slowly shifted Dara sideways so he could get an arm under Dara's knees and carry him into Lehrer's quarters. Trying to calm him down by pressing soft kisses and 'I love you's' to Dara's face but Dara only cried harder.

Lehrer directed Noam to Dara's bedroom where he carefully set him down on the bed. When he tried to draw away Dara fisted his hands in his chiton, keeping him close. Noam kneeled on the bed to hug him, still whispering sweetly in Dara's ear but it was to no avail. Dara didn't let go of him, if only to block the sight of Lehrer.

Eventually he ran out of tears, letting out stuttering breaths against Noam's neck. "Don't leave me here," he begged, "Don't leave me here with him."

But Noam still refused to open his eyes, "It's only temporary. It's just until you are better and then you can leave again."

Dara shook his head. He pushed Noam away. "If you leave me here I will die here. One way or the other," he spat out.

Noam stilled, before grasping his shoulders, "You don't mean that-"

"I do, I will. And this time you can't pretend you never noticed anything wrong until it was too late because, unlike your mom, I'm telling you." It was cruel, Dara was aware of that, but the truth was often cruel. And Noam always said he appreciated honest men.

"Nothing will happen to him," Lehrer promised in a low voice. "I will make sure of it. No one will hurt him. Not even himself."

"That's such bullshit," Dara threw the words at him, Lehrer's eyes flashed briefly at the cursing but Dara refused to look away. His anger was alive and burning him to ashes.

"It's better if you left now, Noam. You're upsetting him I'm afraid." Lehrer gave Noam a sad smile, one Noam returned. 

"No."

"Yes, Dara. Be good," Lehrer reproached.

"No!" He twisted his fingers in Noam's clothes but it was to no avail. Noam gently pried his hands off of him and gave them each a parting kiss before slowly backing away.

"I'll visit."

"He won't let you!" Noam didn't listen, never listened. He tried to smile at Dara but his eyes were already overflowing, then he left. The door slamming behind him. Dara turned his full attention to Lehrer who was looking at him with eyes weighed down by disappointment, the kind that turned very easily into anger.

"Well," he said sharply, "That was all very dramatic."

Dara stayed silent.

"Nothing to say? After all the trouble you went through to undermine me?" Lehrer tsked. "You didn't truly expect to have a chance at winning? I didn't raise you to be dumb. Then again, I didn't raise you to be a lot of the things you are today, a slut for example."

"I beg to differ," Dara forced out.

Lehrer's eyes were cold as ice, "Please tell me you don't actually blame your habit of spreading your legs for everything that moves on me."

"You ruined me." There were tears now, he could feel them stinging in his eyes. 

"You were broken long before I ever knew you existed. We are both well aware of that."

"You hurt me. You were my father you never should have touched me like that."

"And you continue to pretend that it was my idea."

"It was. You were-"

"You were desperate, practically begging for me. You wanted it to happen and I don't understand how you have convinced yourself of the delusion that it was somehow my fault. I am sick and tired of having this discussion with you and you will stop bringing it up." Dara swallowed his tears, they weren't going to help him, there was no point in crying over what he had to do. He had wanted it for a long time after all. "Don't think I don't know what you're thinking, if you ever try to kill yousef again there will be consequences."

Dara raised his chin defiantly, "Not if I succeed."

Lehrer looked slightly surprised at that, then his face contorted in an almost endeared expression. "Silly boy, I wasn't talking about consequences for you," he said with a smile that made the hair on Dara's arms stand on end. "Maybe Ames will have an accident or Bethany an unhappy arranged marriage, she's old enough, isn't she? And you seem to think so badly of me, it would sadden you immensely if I were to make a move on Noam. He would be happier about it than you, that's for sure. Maybe even as happy as you were at the very beginning." He frowned again, "You were such a sweet young thing, always so eager to get my approval. Why did you have to grow into this mess?"

Dara could feel his breathing picking up, all that fire fleeing his body as soon as Noam's name was mentioned. "No."

"Yes," Lehrer murmured, raising an eyebrow. Looking as unaffected as always, like he wasn't spinning Dara's worst nightmares into words. He raised his hand to cradle Dara's cheek, the kind of affection that 13 year old Dara would have given anything for. "Of course, none of that is necessary if you are good. I do so adore it when you are good." Dara could hear the demand in those words loud and clear.

He leaned into the hand. "I'll behave, I promise. I'll be good. Please, _please_ don't hurt them."

Lehrer tilted his head, a satisfied glint in his eyes, "I don't understand why you can't be like this all the time, flower. You can be such a darling when you try." He fell silent, considering Dara. "On your back."

Dara laid back, even spread his legs so Lehrer could fit between them. Lehrer was as gentle as he ever got, rewarding Dara for his pliantness. Like being careful would make it any less violent. Like the physical pain was the issue.

Lehrer kissed the exact spot beneath his ear that Noam loved so much, he bit down and worried at it with his teeth and tongue until he left a dark mark. Gently stroked Dara's sides, slid his hand lower to wrap it around him. He was half hard, something he liked to call 'unwanted bodily reactions from physical stimulation' and Lehrer liked to call 'consent.'

"That's not necessary," he quickly said. Not shoving Lehrer's hand away, he knew better than to instigate touch. Even in those early days, when Dara still thought their arrangement a good thing, Lehrer preferred it when he stayed submissive. Would get frustrated when Dara didn't behave like that.

"I think you deserve a reward," Lehrer told him quietly, "Hold still."

"I don't want that kind of reward."

"That's nonsense. I thought we just agreed to be good," Lehrer said in a patronising tone. He kept going, until Dara shuddered through a reluctant orgasm. "That wasn't difficult, was it?" There was humour in his voice. "Come join me later. And _don't_ try anything," he warned. Then he left.

Dara closed his eyes tightly to keep the tears at bay but it didn't work. Shame was swirling sickly in his stomach _. It's just your body reacting. It's not enjoyment. It certainly isn't consent._

He eventually managed to pick himself up from the bed and get dressed. Quickly jumping into the baths and scrubbing at his skin until it was red. He wanted to scrape it clean it until he didn't have Lehrer's marks all over him. He wanted to cut it away so he would feel clean again. But that wasn't allowed so he settled for hot water, scratching and washing himself again and again until all of Lehrer was out of him. 

He heaved himself out of the pool and dressed in a floor length blue chiton, he knew that a layer of clothe between him and Lehrer wouldn't work but it made him feel a little better.

He steeled himself before striding out of the bathroom with a confidence he didn't feel. Finding Lehrer in the sitting room. He was sat in a chair, Wolf at his feet, frowning at some parchment. He looked up when Dara walked in, smiling faintly as he patted his lap. Dara froze, his legs refusing to carry him closer. Lehrer held his gaze patiently, "Well?"

Dara swallowed and forced himself to move closer until he was standing in front of Lehrer and looking down at his lap. He slowly turned and sat down on the very edge of Lehrer's leg, barely putting any weight on him. Knowing immediately that it wouldn't be enough. He was right. Lehrer's long fingers slinked around his waist to pull him closer, his side pressed against Lehrer's chest, his breath ruffling Dara's hair. He rucked up the chiton until Dara's legs were bare. Then he settled one hand on Dara's thigh, thumb gently stroking the skin and bend one arm around him so he could continue reading. Dara probably should try to catch a glimpse of what it was but he felt tired all of a sudden. The constant fear eating away at the last of his will. 

He was startled out of his thoughts by someone knocking on the door. Raphael was here. He started to slide of Lehrer's lap but he kept him close. "Enter."

Raphael walked inside, pausing at the sight of Dara in Lehrer's lap. Dara felt his cheek heat up with the knowledge of what he saw He looked debauched with his bare thighs, messy hair and hickeys on his neck. Looked like a whore. There was no mistaking what was going on.

To his credit Raphael kept his cool. "I'm here to talk about Adalwolf."

"Very well," Lehrer said. He put his parchment down on a table and gave Raphael his full attention.

"I was hoping I could do that alone. Without an audience," he said casting a meaningful look onto Dara.

"He's as involved as you are, you can talk freely."

"Calix," Raphael sighed.

"Something the matter?"

"You know this is wrong," Raphael continued with a determined look in his eyes.

"No, I don't think I do," Lehrer murmured with a warning note in his voice.

"Don't lie. If we succeed in bringing Wolf back-"

"When," Lehrer interupted

"- what do you think he would say about this? Do you think he would agree? He would say this is wrong."

"Because Wolf was such a paragon of moral righteousness." Lehrer's fingers had tightened on Dara's thigh, slowly painting bruises into his skin

"He would hate what you have become. He did some messed up things in the name of the war and he could forgive you for almost anything but _raping your own child-_ Calix I thought there might have been something left in you."

Lehrer shot to his feet, throwing Dara off his lap and onto the ground. Wolf quickly skittered out of the way. "Dara consented."

"I don't think you know how that works."

"Even if I do rape Dara, what are you going to do about it?" Raphael didn't say anything. "You tell yourself that you haven't 'saved' him yet because I am too powerful, but is that true? You need me to get Adalwolf back. You want to get him back too. That's why you have turned away, think about it." A flash of magic sparked the air, Dara saw it, Raphael guessed it was there but he couldn't do anything about it. Thoughts already darkening with guilt.

"I believe we will only cause each other more stress today, so I must ask you to leave." Lehrer stroked a lock of hair out of his face. Raphael worked his jaw furiously before bowing stiffly and leaving the room. Clearly deciding that aggravating Lehrer anymore wasn't smart. He closed the doors behind him, leaving Dara alone again.

Lehrer breathed deeply, Dara laid still. Hoping Lehrer wouldn't shatter his jaw again. "Leave," Lehrer pressed the word through gritted teeth. Dara immediately scrambled up and nearly ran to his room. Hiding behind the door like hiding had ever helped before. Eventually he sank to the floor and started to sob, anemones spreading through the seams in the marble.

He would die here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anemone: fading hope and feeling forsaken
> 
> Heyyy I'm back. Sorry it took so long I had a busy week. Also this chapter was very heavy:(  
> The good news is I'm also working on a part 3 of the Ahava series. It's not finished yet but Noam and Dara are talking about having more children or possibly fostering them. 
> 
> That being said, I have a question. What would you think of a Noam chapter? It might be interesting to see things from his perspective. Possibly necessary if I'm going to stick to one of my ideas.
> 
> I keep forgetting his name isn't really Raphael. I like it a lot better than Ben so I'm going to pretend it's his real name.
> 
> Canon: Dara had no healthy relationship with an adult ever in his life (besides maybe his parents but we don't know anything about them).  
> Me: Dara has an earth grandma, who loves him very much in her own way and teaches him that money isn't real and that everything dies. And he has an uncle who also loves him and tries to shield him, even though that is not a possibility. Who helps him through break ups and you can take this from my COLD DEAD HANDS.


	9. Take her head upon your knee;

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we get Noam's point of view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings  
> Grooming/manipulation  
> Uncanny people  
> Self hatred  
> Nightmares  
> Off screen sexual content in said nightmares (it's consensual)  
> Suicide (in the nightmare)  
> Mention of people dying/dead people
> 
> The chapters after this will also take a while bc school is beginning again and I'm just a lot faster when writing cutesy stuff instead of plot. Sorry for the wait! Certain plot point will have to be moved so there might be another chapter as an epilogue. 
> 
> Next chapter will also be mostly Noam's point of view with some of Dara's (?) (Lehrer's?????) I'm not sure yet. The issue is that I planned out this fic and then decided to add some major plot points last minute. I've tried to hash them all out so they are set up better which is working out alright (Except for the reason Noam died that was butchered but I developed like 20.000 words of plot after chapter 2 so) Thanks for all the sweet comments! They help a lot!

The day was finally over and Noam stretched out lazily into the cool air of the early evening. The silk of Dara's sheets a blessing against his overheated skin. Dara himself a warm weight against him. Lax in the way he always was after they had made love. Eager to give and receive affection in a way Noam seldom saw when they were not alone.

He nuzzled into Noam's shoulder as Noam gently ran his hand over Dara's back, marvelling over how smooth his skin felt. He wondered if it was a byproduct of divinity or just Dara himself. Dara lifted his head from his shoulder to sweetly smile up at him. Obsidian eyes bright with joy. And love. Noam knew this now. How did he not see it earlier? It was clear as day.

Noam tangled his fingers in Dara's curls to gently massage his head, Dara's eyes always slipped half closed when he did that. And Noam swore, _swore_ that he started purring. He smiled wider and whispered, "You like that, baby?"

"You know I do," Dara said, slowly focussing those impossibly dark eyes on Noam to give him an annoyed stare.

"Just asking. No need to get catty."

"You're annoying, you know that?"

"You've said it a couple of times." Noam was outright grinning now, not stopping his hand movements.

"I hate you," Dara said without any bite in his words. Leaning up to kiss him.

"Oh, no," Noam murmured between kisses, "Can't have that, please let me make it up to you. How do I make you happy?"

He asked it jokingly but he wondered about it often. The weeks they spent together were utter bliss. But Dara had issues. Even Noam could see that. The hatred towards Lehrer, how angry he seemed to be all the time, the drinking and refusing to eat ambrosia. There were always shadows in his eyes. And Noam wasn't sure how he could make them leave, if he could make them leave. Maybe they were permanent by now, but Noam liked to think he could help. That maybe he could be enough for Dara. That might be his saviour complex, as Dara called it. Noam wasn't special, he was no prince on a white horse, he knew that. Was very aware of the fact that only love was never enough to save someone, but he had to try. What else could he give?

"There might be something," Dara said against his lips. He pushed himself upright, throwing a leg over Noam's waist to straddle him, using his shoulders for balance. That maddening smile already dancing on his plush lips.

"Oh?" Noam raised an eyebrow, hands already finding Dara's hips. "What is it?"

"I think you can guess," Dara said, leaning down to kiss him again, sighing when Noam's hands started roaming over his body, slowly grinding his hips down. "Please."

Noam kissed him deeply. "Baby," he whispered when the kiss broke. Quickly diving back in to steal another one.

"Please." He was panting now. Was that pleasure? He wasn't kissing back.

Noam pulled back, opening his eyes to give Dara a confused look. "Dara?"

"Please," Dara's eyes were wide with fear, hands scrambling to keep a hold on Noam's skin. "Please, please, please, please, please, I didn't mean to.

"I know you didn't. It's alright." Noam said, sitting up and taking Dara with him, "No need for panic."

"Noam," Dara half sobbed. "Please. Don't leave me. I'll do anything. Please!" Then a hand shot out from behind him, grabbing him by the hair and harshly pulling him off the bed. Dara hit the floor hard and screamed as Lehrer dragged him towards a door.

Noam couldn't seem to move his limbs as Dara was thrown out of the room. Lehrer slamming the door behind him. Locking it with the same affable air he always surrounded himself with. Even as Dara's desperate pleading was still audible from behind the door. _Noam, Noam, Noam._

He stood there silently for a moment, studying the horror that was surely written all over Noam's face. He smiled at Noam and left. Not looking back, even when the only sound that came from behind the door was sobbing. Sobbing that turned slowly into silence.

Noam tried to force himself to move but it didn't work. He could only stare at the door that Dara had disappeared behind. 

Could only stare as golden liquid started to spread from under the doorframe.

* * *

He woke up screaming.

He looked around wildly for Dara. But this wasn't Dara's bed and this wasn't Dara's house.

Dara wasn't here.

Dara was locked up in a gilded cage at the very top of Olympus, probably feeling devastated that Noam was the one who put him there.

Noam had never hated himself so much as when left Dara there after he had ripped out his heart. Gods, he was an asshole. The love of his life was torn apart from the inside out by their enemies and Noam had told him to fuck off. At least he knew it was a lie. Noam couldn't bring himself to feel embarrassed at the knowledge that Dara had heard all the nasty thoughts he had flung at him in the very beginning. And all the hopelessly smitten ones he had later.

Everything would be alright eventually. Lehrer would keep Dara safe until the Persians were far enough away that their worship wasn't breaking him anymore. He would get better. Sacha would be dethroned and then they would have all the time in the world. He would do it right this time. He had never courted anyone before. Carly was someone he considered an option, but they were very young and it was unlikely her father would have agreed. He knew that Noam was poor and had to support his father, and he didn't like him.

At least that wouldn't be an issue with Lehrer. Would Dara want to get married? Would Dara love him after this? After what he had done? After he got his mind back? Would he forgive him for everything? Would Noam have the time to court him like he deserved if he did? Lehrer had implied he had big plans for Noam. Plans that would give Noam a lot of power. He liked that, he did, but he wasn't sure if he wanted it if Dara wasn't there with him.

Noam sighed tiredly. He hadn't slept well since Dara had been locked away. His eyes haunted him. Devastated and desperate the last time he had seen them. It had been more than a week now. Lehrer refusing to let him see Dara, claiming that seeing Noam would set him off all over again.

"I don't have time to console my crying child for hours, Noam. He is calmer when you are not there, he will get hysterical as soon as he sets eyes on you again. You saw him last time, the poor thing has completely lost his way." Lehrer looked tired too. Getting a irritated look in his eyes every time Noam asked about Dara again, a look Noam didn't like but he couldn't put into words why.

Noam tried to bring Dara things from his house, remembering how bare Dara's room had been. One of the only ways he could show Dara he was thinking about him. Books, plants, jewellery and clothes. He wrote Dara little notes on the inside of the covers, hoping he wouldn't be too mad at the defiling his books. Bethany had taken to gathering flowers and braiding them into crowns for Noam to take with him. Taye had started weaving him an intricate cloak as a gift to cheer him up as soon as he heard what had happened. Ames hadn't done anything, just stared at Noam with flaming eyes when he told her that Dara had been brought to Lehrer's palace for safekeeping and that Noam didn't exactly know why either. The rumours were that the Persians might try to kidnap Dara, retake Haoma. 

She hadn't believe him. Slamming the door in his face and marching back into Dara's house, she had been staying there. Hating the thought of moving back into her own villa or her father's palace. It wouldn't be his for much longer anyway, Lehrer hadn't chosen a successor yet but they both knew it wouldn't be Ames. She stayed loyal to Dara, no matter what.

She had made slamming the door in his face a habit. Radiating contempt and doing it with every ounce of pure malice she could bring up. Ames had quite a lot of it. He was pretty sure that the only reason she even opened the door was because it might be Bethany. Or maybe she just liked to slam the door in his face that much.

He waited until she had stormed further into the house to use the key to open the door. Quietly searching for anything that Dara might miss. He grabbed another book, just to be sure. Dara was a fast reader and there wasn't much else he could do to pass the time in Lehrer's apartment. Noam hoped he wasn't too lonely in there. He hesitated before scribbling another message above the first paragraph.

After that he carefully searched through the jewellery Dara owned. He almost felt embarrassed to see his own gifts stored among the wealth that Dara possessed. He had mostly stuck to giving him simple adornments, golden bands and chains in star or flower patterns. A stray jewel here or there but Noam had been afraid of being too gaudy or presumptuous. They looked like something a child made in contrast with the sapphires, diamonds and emeralds Dara had hanging in this thing. But they were stored carefully in the middle all the same. And since Noam had started gifting them he rarely saw Dara with anything else anymore. So they must mean something to him.

It didn't make Noam feel better.

He pulled out a necklace he had given Dara soon after they had started their relationship. They had been having lunch in the shadow of some laurel trees, Dara had tasted like honey and smiled so beautifully it almost hurt to look at. 

The necklace hadn't been anything impressive, he had bought it on a whim after he saw it on the market, a string of white gold with a single crystal star hanging off it. Dara had loved it, giddy with excitement as he turned around and asked Noam to put it on him. He had kissed Noam afterwards, they had to break apart because they were smiling too much.

He gently laid it inside the book, maybe the memories would cheer Dara up.

Probably not.

He sighed, grabbing the book and Taye's finished cloak and started jogging in the direction of the palace. He was so focussed on his thoughts he almost ran face first into a tall man with greying blond hair. "Oh, I'm sorry! Wasn't watching were I was going."

"No, I should have been more careful," the man said, adjusting his glasses and looking up, the smile dying on his face. "Are you Lehrer's new student? Noam, I believe."

"Yes." Noam felt wary all of a sudden. "Who are you?"

The man tilted his head slightly. Looking at Noam like he was an interesting specimen pinned on a table. "My apologies. I'm Raphael."

The one that knew more about Adalwolf. Had he been meeting with Lehrer? "Did you see Dara?"

The mans face twitched minutely."Yes."

"Is he okay?"

Raphael gave him a flat look but didn't say anything.

Noam felt his stomach plummet to his feet. "Is he hurt? What happened? Tell me!"

Raphael shuddered minutely, he got a strange look on his face as he opened his mouth, "He's mostly fine. Less than thrilled at being held captive in the palace."

Noam's shoulders sagged in relief. "He's not being held captive. It's for his own good."

Raphael gave him a dubious look, eyes intensely searching his face. "Will that be all?"

"No." Noam took a little pleasure in the fact that Raphael's expression flickered in irritation. "I want to ask you some more questions later. If that's okay?"

Raphael sighed, long and deep. "Yes, fine. It's not like I have better things to do. Now if you don't mind, I'm taking my leave." He walked away without looking back. Noam hesitated in place for a second but then decided to move forward. Chasing the god down the hall would probably get him obliterated.

He knocked on the door to Lehrer's office, walking inside when he heard the deep voice say "Enter."

Lehrer sat behind his desk staring at some papers. He looked up when Noam entered, giving him a small, intimate smile that made something low thrum through Noam's stomach. "Good morning, sir."

"Good morning, Noam." Lehrer's smile widened the tiniest bit when he said Noam's name but to Noam it felt like a mile. He gestured for Noam to take a seat.

He shook his head to clear it and quickly flickered his eyes towards the bookcase hiding the doors to Lehrer's quarters. "How's Dara holding up?"

Lehrer dropped his smile as he leaned back into his chair and sighed. "He's less upset, still sleeping very little. I can convince him to eat if I take the time for it." He gave Noam a reassuring smile when he saw his stricken face. "He'll be fine, Noam. I promise. Don't worry about it anymore."

The words made Noam feel a lot better so he tried to smile back. "Thank you. I brought some more things. A cloak and another book." Noam laid the items on the desk between them. Nervously drumming his fingers on the edge of it.

Lehrer gave him a wry look, "Are you aware of the fact that I have reading material in my apartment?"

Noam immediately felt his cheeks heat up. "I- yes, of course. I just thought Dara might like his own books."

Lehrer shrugged, "Maybe he does but you are are bringing in quite a lot of things, they distract him when he needs to rest and there are moments where reminders of the outside upset him. So I'm afraid this is the last time."

Noam's breath caught in his throat. "What if he needs something?"

Lehrer's face was exasperated. "If he needs something specific I will tell you. You have more important things to worry about right now. We are ready to overthrow Sacha."

What? It felt like they had started planning only yesterday. Lehrer had been setting this up for years now but it still felt too soon. "Now? We've barely beaten the Persians."

"I'm well aware of that. But now is our chance I'm sure of it. Sacha's power will only grow if we wait longer."

Noam blew out a breath. "Yes, you're right."

Lehrer send him a teasing smile. "I tend to be." Then he grew serious again, "There is a lot I have to ask of you."

Noam straightened in his chair. "I'm ready. I know it's necessary."

Lehrer leaned forward, bending his head slightly downward. He spoke, in a voice so low Noam had to lean forward to hear it, "I am aware. You will do as I ask. But it is still a lot. I trust you are ready to do what needs to be done, Noam." Noam looked down startled when Lehrer grabbed his hand. When he looked up again Lehrer was closer than before, staring at him with an intense look in his eye that made Noam shudder in... he wasn't sure what he was feeling. "I need you to eliminate Sacha."

Noam pulled his hand back. "What?"

Lehrer gave him an impatient look, "You have to eliminate Sacha. You are the only one I trust. I will create a distraction so you can cross the river Styx and then you will have to do the rest. If you do it quickly the enemy will surrender easily. He is not very loved, most his subjects obey him because they fear him."

Noam knew it might come to this. They were going to war, people always died in war. It would be unfair of him to ask people to kill when he wasn't willing to do it himself. But still. He was getting a headache. "Why haven't they turned on him yet if they fear him? You are more powerful than he is, by all means they should be more afraid of you."

Lehrer stood and slowly rounded the desk, the very tip of the fingers of his right hand trailing the top of it. His eyes didn't leave Noam's as he sat down on the edge, he looked even taller this way. "They are more afraid of me, however Sacha is in a position that permits him to deliver severe short term consequences. They have no choice. Once they realise that I am closing in they will betray him. It's also possible that some of them are tied to the underworld and therefore its leader."

That left one problem. "How do I kill him?"

Lehrer waved his hand. "You don't have to kill him. You just have to throw him in Tartarus. A death sentence of its own. Unfortunately that will be the easy part." Noam's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. _That_ would be the easy part? "You will go with him into Tartarus to ensure he stays there and does not manage to slip away. Afterwards you will find my brother."

"Adalwolf?" He was dead. had been dead for millennia, possibly eons. 

"I only have one brother," Lehrer reprimanded lightly, like he wasn't asking Noam to do the impossible. "Adalwolf is not dead, at least not entirely." He paused. "Did I ever tell you how my brother died?"

"He died in the final push against the titans?" Noam tried.

"In a way. He wasn't killed by them as the myths tell. Instead to ensure our victory he hurled himself in Tartarus after Cronus. It is my belief that he is still alive, or rather, he still exists."

"How?" Noam whispered astonished.

"You are aware of the fact that we gain our power through belief?" Lehrer continued when Noam nodded, "It is a cycle of sorts. Adalwolf is still alive because I demand it so," Lehrer's eyes were ablaze with a pale, deathly fire, "I demanded the mortals worship him even in death, I made sure my worship became unanimous with his. I have as of recently secured enough belief to bring him back into existence. There is one issue."

Noam stared on in horror. "He is still in Tartarus."

"Correct," Lehrer said.

Noam shut his eyes. "And I have to get him."

"You do."

"Isn't there someone else? Someone with more experience?" 

Lehrer sighed, throwing up a hand, "Well, there's Dara but he is not an option. I don't trust anyone besides you. I trained you for this. I know you are capable of doing this."

Was he? Pain pounded behind his eyes.

"You are. Noam, you have to do as I say. There's no other option."

There really wasn't.

Noam had to do it.

The thought settled in his mind with a fervent conviction. He had to do it. "I will do it. How do I know where your brother is?"

Lehrer looked at him with gratitude on his face. "He will come to you. You inherited part of my powers when I created you, therefore we have a similar aura. It will be familiar enough that he will be drawn to you."

That was all well and good but it contained a lot of assumptions, "What if he doesn't recognise me? What if he doesn't come? He might not even exist!" He shouldn't have said that last sentence as it made devastating fury flash across Lehrer's eyes.

It was brief, very brief. It was gone in just a second though, and Lehrer's face hadn't changed at all. Still, his tone was warning, "Do not question me. I know more about this than you." His stone eyes bored into Noam for a second before they softened. Noam could breath again. "Trust me."

"I do."

"Good." Lehrer gave him another reassuring smile, "You will have to go in three days. Prepare yourself." He gently squeezed Noam's shoulder.

Noam didn't remember leaving. He was just suddenly standing in front of Bethany's house. Bethany herself was looking at him with concerned eyes, a wrinkle forming between them. Noam brought up a hand to gently try to smooth it away with his thumb, "Heya."

"Hi," she said, frown still on her face, "Did something happen?" Noam gave her a lethargic shrug. Every movement seemed to cost him mountains of energy. She ushered him inside, setting him down on the couch. He saw her nervously twist her fingers together, "Did something- Is Dara-"

"Dara's fine, Beth. Don't need to worry about him." Noam tried using his older brother voice, it only made Bethany pull her face in a grimace.

"So I need to worry about you."

Noam blew out a breath, "No, I'm fine too."

"Doesn't seem like it. And don't tell me not to worry about it. I'm young not blind. Telling me nothing is going on when it clearly is isn't helping me," she said in a serious voice. Her face was grave. Noam felt a spark of regret at the fact that he couldn't shield her. She was too young for all this shit. But what else could he do? Tell her he was going to doom someone to eternal pain? What would she think of him? How could he claim he wanted to protect her when he himself was responsible for some of the violence she had to endure? He knew she looked up to him.

"I-I don't know what to do." The words fell out of his mouth like heavy stones. It felt terrible to admit.

"Oh," Bethany said with a soft voice and softer eyes, "Oh, Noam. It's going to be okay." She sat down next to him and hugged him tightly. She couldn't know that, tears welled into Noam's eyes anyway. He hugged her back tightly, making sure she couldn't see them.

They stayed like that for a long time.

* * *

Three days were over before he knew it. 

He was going to overthrow an empire and he felt strangely numb. All his old furious determination had left him, leaving only the barren cold.

A cold that was echoed by the stone surrounding him. It almost seemed malicious, it couldn't be directed at him. His powers were carefully cloaking him, tipping Sacha of to his presence would be a death sentence. He nervously held the weapons Lehrer had gifted to him closer to himself. They were radiating a sharp heat even while covered. He had carefully wrapped it in layers of cloth to hide the shine of the lighting bolts. Kerounai, Lehrer had called them. He had told Noam that he had an infinite amount himself when he gifted three to Noam. "You might not be able to handle more," Lehrer had said, "They are difficult to control and the drawback is demanding. You are powerful but still so very young." His hand had gently cupped Noam's face in an affectionate gesture. His thumb skimmed over Noam's lips and Noam's breath hitched. Noam thought he saw a small smirk in the corner of Lehrer's lips the but he had drawn away before Noam could get a better look. Leaving Noam's heart beating against his chest like the galloping of a horse.

How the fuck was he supposed to fight a god with three lighting bolts?

Dara managed to kill a god of the same caliber with a knife but Noam wasn't Dara. He didn't fucking know how to do this, he was barely immortal for fucks' sake. 

Was someone coming? Noam froze. Straining his ears to hear anything over his panicked heartbeat but he didn't hear anything. It could have been stones. 

Could have been.

He stayed in place for a minute. Relaxing a little when no one came to attack him.

He hurried further downwards, he didn't have all the time in the world. The walls seemed to close in on him and he could swear he was being watched. Two big eyes boring down on him from above. When he finally slipped out of the crack holding the stairwell he immediately pressed himself against the wall. The underworld was dark but the creatures here were accustomed for that. Designed for it even. Noam was the outsider.

He carefully looked around, to his right he could see the dead cluster together, desperately waiting for a chance to board Charon's boat. Charon himself was a small figure near the other side of the river Styx. Scattered over the rest of the shore were the waiting dead, those who were not buried with a coin and could therefore not pay to be brought to the other side, having to wait a hundred years on the shore until they were allowed to cross the river. Most of the people must have been here for a while, either aimlessly moving with a blank look on their face or sitting down with unseeing eyes that stared at the mist hanging over the river. Noam shivered, they reminded him of his father. Would he have awoken in dead? Or would he have sat down in the sand to continue wasting away? Was he even here? He had been a hellenist until he converted to judaism for Noam's mother so did he go to the underworld or to she'ol? Was this she'ol? Did different underworlds exist simultaneously? Maybe he was here, maybe a chance of seeing his wife again would be enough to stir him into motion, then again, Noam hadn't been enough so maybe not. 

When the Persians had been chased out of Athens he had painstakingly buried each of the dead and given them the sparse coins that he could find, even his father so he could be certain. So it was possible that his father had already crossed over. Was he worried about Noam? Waiting on a son that would never return to his arms? Was his mother? 

Noam roughly wiped his face dry. He did not have time to grieve. He slipped his deadly package under his left arm so it would be obscured by the fall of his chlamys and wandered further into the open. Slowly approaching the Styx. Bowing his head slightly, careful not to walk in a straight line. He couldn't stand out.

Lehrer had told him that Styx herself would help him cross. The water wouldn't harm him. But what reason did he have to believe her? A murderess with an unclear agenda who was helping Lehrer. Why would he trust Lehrer? No, he couldn't think like that. He had to trust Lehrer.

He arrived at the edge of the river. Charon wasn't close yet but Styx didn't seem to be either. His eyes frantically searched the water. The only thing he saw were uncaring black waters mirroring his own face back at him. He shuffled slowly closer, careful not to let his feet touch the water. "Styx," he hissed.

Still nothing. The water rippled, as if laughing at him. "Styx," he said again. He bend in half to gaze into the river. There was still no reaction. If she didn't help him he would be doomed. "Fuck!"

Right under his face two eyes opened. Then the corners of a wide mouth slowly turned up in a nightmarish grin. "It's improper to curse in front of a lady. Don't they have etiquette lessons on top of your little mountain?" As she was talking she slowly rose up. The black water formed her face, then her neck, then her shoulders and chest. Her head was bend backwards in a near unnatural angle, her long ink dark hair hanging behind her in a wet trail. Her mouth didn't move, Noam noticed stupidly. Why the fuck didn't her mouth move?

"My apologies, lady Styx," he forced out as he slowly backed away.

As she righted her head she almost looked disappointed in him. "Where has all that bite fled to?" she asked with a downward tilt to her mouth.

"I"m afraid your grin has swallowed it all," Noam said. He wanted to beat himself. Now was not the time.

But she just grinned widely again, "There it is. And as I told your little friend. Calling me lady is unbecoming."

"How so?" Noam really hoped she wasn't one of those riddle gods. He had to stay an okay terms with her for at least the next couple of hours and he couldn't do that if he told her to shut the fuck up.

"How so indeed," she said, grinning madly again. Noam jumped back when she made a slashing motion with her hand without warning. It was a sharp gesture, her hand cleaved the water and it split. Slowly opening into an opening wide enough for him to step into.

"Are you serious?" 

She didn't give him any inclination that she had heard him. 

"I have to go into that? Why not split the whole river?"

"Because," she stated slowly as if to a child, "Then the water level would rise and the current would be interrupted. Charon has ferried the dead over me many times, he will notice oddities. He would be made aware of our scheming, this is already a risk. So I would move faster. Less it closes over your head." She said it innocently but it was clear she meant the threat. And he had no other choice.

He walked forward, refusing to break eye contact first. She grinned widely as she slowly moved backwards. It didn't feel like a retreat. Eventually he stepped entirely into the space she had made for him as she stepped back into the wall of water.

He stepped forward, the water moved with him. Then it closed behind him. He didn't panic until it closed above him. _I'm going to die here, in this damned coffin._

"Don't look so frightened. I might just eat you right up." Her voice always seemed to come from right behind him. "Your little rose has a much better pokerface."

_Dara._

"What do you know about him?" he asked. The water lashed out at his heels to get him moving again. 

She sighed, "Only that you have doomed him as much as the people crossing my river. And that I will see him again. One day. I wonder how much of him will be alive."

The cold settling in Noam's bones had nothing to do like the in dark water. "Stop talking."

She sighed again, "As you wish, your majesty."

He ignored her taunts. Could only move forward, further into the abyss that was her form. He wondered if she and chaos looked a lot alike. Wondered how her waters could be the exact same shade as Dara's eyes, yet comparing the two almost seemed like blasphemy. Maybe it was because she was cold and lifeless as stone and Dara's eyes seemed always so full of bright possibilities. 

_But for how long?_

Noam started walking at a faster pace. Thinking like that wasn't helping. He had to focus. Focus on the mission. On the horrors he had to commit to limit the horrors others could commit.

He was rudely torn away from his thought by the water cell ominously rippling around him. Like a stomach. "What's going on?"

"Charon has arrived." He turned around, expecting to see her standing there but there was only more darkness. "Careful with that," she said still from behind him, "If you turn too much you will forget the way forward. Might never resurface!" She almost sounded happy at that outcome. He carefully turned back and started walking again. "Charon has arrived and someone has been handing out coins. Too many. They are fighting each other to get into the boat. My, what a spectacle."

So this was Lehrer's distraction. If the unrest became too big Sacha would have to send more and more troops, leaving him vulnerable. This was Noam's chance. He started jogging, feeling the ground beneath him slowly curve up until Styx opened up the river above his head and he was resurfaced next to some deceased souls. They didn't seem to notice him, merely staring hazily at the screaming from the other side. When he turned to look he could barely make out the boat, it was nearly obscured by the dust clouds kicked up by desperate crowd. He tried to stay amongst de dead as long as possible before slipping away and stealthily moving up the hill towards Sacha's palace. Being careful to stay low. He couldn't run into anyone, he needed his strength for Tartarus and using a lighting bolt would draw way too much attention.

He reached the wall and pressed himself against it. Normally an Erinys would be guarding the house. One was listening to mortals complaining, one was resting, one was guarding the walls. All three of them seemed to be sent to Charon's aid. He smiled to himself as he scaled the wall, slower than he would have been had he been able to use both hands but he managed. This was easy, he thought to himself when he landed on top of it in a crouch. He carefully looked over the edge. No one.

That's when he noticed a presence behind him.

He threw himself onto the ground, barely avoiding the talons that were aimed at his neck, rolling quickly to his feet and facing his opponent. He had been wrong when he assumed all of the Erinyes had left. The one standing in front of him was wearing a dress that was drenched in blood, her wings moving quickly to slow her momentum and turn her around again. She hung still for a moment, perhaps surprised that he had dodged her attack, then her face twisted itself into a grimace. "You will not escape me."

"Well, I just did," Noam said airily, "What's your name?"

She haughtily threw her head back. "I am Tisiphone. I punish murderers."

"I don't remember murdering someone. Maybe ya got the wrong guy?"

She sniffed angrily, "I know why you're here. You cannot fool me."

"That's a shame," Noam said calmly, then he lashed out with his magic. Sending a stream of fire into her face. She screamed in agony and flinched back. Angrily rubbing her arm over her face before pulling the belt around her waist loose, revealing a dangerous looking whip. She screamed again, louder. Calling her sisters before diving at him again. Shit.

He jumped over the wall at the last moment, causing her fly into the side of the wall, she was stunned for a second , but not for long. Noam tried to slow his momentum by scraping against the wall. Slowing his descent with a burst of power when that didn't work. He landed heavily, jarring both his legs but paying it no mind as he immediately turned around with his hands up in a defensive stance. He hoped that her sisters were too busy with mortals to pay her any mind because this was already taking way too long.

She was standing on top of the wall, waiting to attack. Wary after he had managed to fight her off. She didn't dive again, merely standing very still with her dark bird eyes observing his every move. When he slowly started to back away to the castle she attacked again, almost taking out one of his eyes when she lashed out again. leaving a deep groove of gold on his right arm. She bared her teeth at the scent of blood but didn't move again after he had stayed in place. _She's waiting me out._

Fuck.

He wasn't sure if he could take out all three sisters. He had the bolts but then he would have to fight Sacha without any. It was best to move quickly. He turned and started running to the castle entrance, heart beating in his throat. She pursued him without thinking. As his feet carried him as swift as possible to the door his hands fumbled to undo the fabric surrounding the weapons. She was too induced in the hunt to notice the suspicious light in his hand. She only saw it when he turned around, her arm bend backwards to use her whip. He brought his own arm back as he threw the lighting. She seemed to freeze for a single second. Then it hit her and she was propelled backwards. With arched back and lax arms she almost looked like something he should pity. He had a second to register that thought before the shockwave hit him. Blinding heat slammed into him like a wall, lifting him near gently off his feet and crashing him through the door.

He laid there dazedly staring up at the dark ceiling that stretched bottomlessly above his head.

"That," a drawling voice said, "Was quite the entrance, mister Álvaro." He turned his eyes deeper into the room. Sacha was sitting calmly, with a bone white crown on his head, smiling his smarmy smile at Noam, like this was an every day occurrence. "We have much to discuss."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to split this in two. Sorry for the cliffhanger!  
> The greeks did have ink. It was made of soot, glue and water.  
> They also had pens of a sort. They were made of stiff reeds that were split at the end.  
> They did not have books. They had scrolls but I got tired of describing scrolls so someone invented books.
> 
> chlamys is a sort of cloak, it kinda looks like a big poncho. In greek art it is mostly worn without anything underneath it. Noam doesn't do that here because it is cold. (Most greek clothes are basically blankets)
> 
> A kerounos means thunderbolt in Greek. It was how Zeus's lightning was described. Kerounia is the plural of that.  
> Zeus had a bucket (or sack) that would never run out of lightning bolts.
> 
> The Erinyes are 3 sisters whose job is to listen to mortal complaints and punish criminals they don't guard Hades. I just needed someone to guard the castle lol
> 
> Noam and Raphael's entire dynamic is just:  
> Noam: I know what I'm doing and what is going on.  
> Raphael: That's what I thought you would say you dumb fucking horse.
> 
> Which I find funny because that's a big part of Noam and Dara's dynamic in the very beginning.  
> Btw Raphael isn't characterised as he was in The traitors crown because the version of events in that book have already happened here and it would make sense to me that Raphael would become a more bitter individual, who's still his nicer self on the inside but he also had to endure years of Lehrer's abuse and mind games and has changed a lot, plus we have mostly seen him in incredible toxic and stressful environments.
> 
> Side note to that: Lehrer isn't (exactly) characterised as he was in the books because the gods have an absolute monarchy, so he can have absolute power for eternity and there would (ideally) be no one who would have a problem with that. Which makes him kinda bored, so he's more antagonistic to Dara and Raphael (mostly Dara tbh) and also starts conflicts with other countries/religions/his own subjects to alleviate some of that boredom. He also does it to prove his superiority to himself and the people around him. And bc he's a dick.


	10. Say to her,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Am I going to enjoy your surprise?" Dara asked.
> 
> Lehrer chuckled lowly, the back of his hand skirting down the side of his face, over a fading bruise near his cheekbone. He caressed along Dara's neck and quickly hooked two fingers under the collar, tugging it lightly. "No," he murmured, leaning forward like he was sharing an intimate secret. "But I will, and isn't that what really matters, Dara?" He was generous with his smiles today, Dara noticed.
> 
> vs
> 
> He rolled onto his stomach to push himself slowly upright. Gods, that hurt. He couldn't let Sacha see that though, so he just grinned darkly at the king, his split lip stinging uncomfortably. Then he spit ichor on the ground. "Fuck. You."
> 
> I just wanted to push this out there. I will come back when I am more awake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM BACK  
> Question: should I give short descriptions of what happened in the chapter so that if people don't want to read a certain thing or theme they can still enjoy the story?  
> Bc on one hand: this fic is pretty heavy, so is fever wake and the end notes are already LONG.  
> on the other hand if someone is triggered by one thing I don't want them to not be able to read the pic but instead skip certain chapters. Idk yet.
> 
> Warnings  
> murder  
> fighting  
> abuse  
> rape (It's on screen but not described in detail.)  
> choking (idk if you're reading this but if you are then you know who you are and this happened bc you reminded me of Lehrer's choking kink.)  
> Me making Lehrer probably a lot worse than he was in canon but I am Blinded by my hatred for him and don't care.  
> Don't treat your children like this please.
> 
> Edit: I forgot the chapter title again goddamnit.  
> Edit: I'm a fucking idiot and had to edit this chapter. It's so difficult to remember everything. Don't worry it's just one line.

Dara was sitting in front of the window, he wasn't allowed on the balcony but Lehrer had a bay window in the wall next to it. The small niche a perfect place to sit down and relax. He leaned his forehead against the glass and exhaled slowly, like this everything seemed small. The gods and nymphs flitting around the agora, sometimes standing still to exchange a few words sometimes calling out hasty greetings before hurrying on to their destination, all looked like they belonged to a different world. A world he used to be part of, even if with every day locked up here it seemed more and more like the fabrication of a damaged mind. His book was leaning against his pulled up knees and Wolf was on the ground, looking at him with the sad eyes he always got when it was nearing dinner time. He absentmindedly scratched him between his ears as slowly paged back to the first chapter.

_I love you, You'll get out of there in no time. You're the strongest person I know and I would wait forever for you. I will wait until all that's left of Greece is dust and ashes if it meant that I would get to see you again, get to see you laugh or cry or blinded by hatred it doesn't matter as long as it's you._

It was scribbled hastily above the first chapter, Noam clearly not having a lot of time. It wasn't long but it still warmed Dara's entire being. He had been gifted love letters, poems, stories. Some done horribly and some done by people who gave new meaning to the phrase 'silver tongue' with their eloquence but none of them had mattered, none of them had made him feel like this. None of the letters or the poems or the men. Definitely not the men.

Maybe it was because they went on and on about his unearthly beauty and what a joy he must be to have in bed, or maybe it was because none of those men were Noam Álvaro. Noam didn't say things he didn't mean, didn't do anything without his entire heart behind it, so a pledge to wait until the end just to see Dara no matter the state he was in was a lot. He smiled bringing up one hand to trace the letters. He tilted his head so the delicate trail of the earring Noam had gifted him brushed his shoulder. It had the form of two delicate carved ivory roses held together by a trail of gold in the form of leaves. The necklace that Noam had put between the pages was already hidden in his room, carefully stored away in the vain hope that Lehrer wouldn't find it. He would have worn it but it would have clashed horribly with the collar Lehrer had locked around his neck.

Solid gold, unadorned with a ring dangling in the hollow of his throat. It wasn't broad but still somehow heavy enough that Dara couldn't forget it was there, always digging in his neck. Lehrer had put in on him on the second day, Dara had recoiled harshly, he remembered. But Lehrer was stronger than him and locked it around his neck with relative ease. Dara had tried to get it off a few times but the gold wouldn't bend and eventually he had given up and accepted it like any other part of his life. Fighting Lehrer was hopeless.

From the corner of his eyes he saw Wolf's ears perk up and his head swivel to the door. Lehrer was back early apparently. Dara quickly closed the book, no reason for Lehrer to know of the little messages Noam was sending him. He drew his legs beneath him and waited. Seconds later the door opened up revealing Lehrer. He didn't look pissed or tired but that wasn't always an indication of how he was going to behave. Even though Dara could read him pretty well after all these years Lehrer was still a master manipulator. And sometimes he liked making Dara hurt for no obvious reason.

Dara's gaze strayed to his hands but he wasn't holding anything. He darted his gaze back up to Lehrer's eyes, they looked coldly amused. "I hope you don't mind but I asked Noam to tone the presents down a bit. He was bringing in quite a lot."

Dara shook his head. "But I've been good?" He hated how vulnerable he sounded. Young and naive. He wasn't naive anymore. He supposed he was still young even though he didn't feel like it sometimes.

Lehrer got a bemused little smile on his face, the same one he got when Wolf did something particular adorable, and strode over to loom over Dara. Bringing up a hand to cradle his face. "You have been very good," he said in the same low soothing voice that Dara used to love so much. "I merely did it because it's quite the distraction and if he kept bringing things in it would simply be too much. Now go sit by my chair and wait for me." He turned to walk to his chambers, not even bothering to turn and look if Dara obeyed, they both knew he would. 

Dara went over to the chair and kneeled next to it. Waiting. Lehrer came back after a couple of minutes, holding something behind his back. He smiled when he saw Dara, it didn't matter how much Dara told himself he hated Lehrer, there was something small and fragile that cried out in hope every time Lehrer behaved in a positive way towards him. Some stray piece of a younger version of him that Dara couldn't seem to kill. "Close your eyes. It's a surprise." Dara closed his eyes, straining his ears to listen to Lehrer's footsteps coming closer and something heavy being set down on the table as Lehrer settled in his arm chair. "Open them." Dara slowly opened his eyes and tried to raise up to his knees to look at what Lehrer had brought him but Lehrer pushed him down again shaking his head. "Not yet."

"Why not?" Dara tilted his head to the side, making his curls fall over his forehead.

Lehrer immediately pushed them back from his face. "A big part of a surprise is waiting for it."

"Am I going to enjoy your surprise?" Dara asked.

Lehrer chuckled lowly, the back of his hand skirting down the side of his face, over a fading bruise near his cheekbone. He caressed along Dara's neck and quickly hooked two fingers under the collar, tugging it lightly. "No," he murmured, leaning forward like he was sharing an intimate secret. "But I will, and isn't that what really matters, Dara?" He was generous with his smiles today, Dara noticed.

"Yes," he whispered. Lehrer gifted him a quick kiss on the mouth for agreeing with him. "You're in a good mood today."

Lehrer bend forward to kiss him again, a little longer this time, smiling against his mouth. "I am."

"Why?"

Lehrer drew back a little, colourless eyes flitting over Dara's face, hand sliding back upwards to grip his chin and turn his face from left to right to study him, deciding whether he felt like telling Dara. Or maybe just admiring his conquest. "The reason for why I'm so upbeat is the fact that, despite your best efforts to hinder me," he gave Dara a reproachful look," everything I've worked for is finally falling into place. Even though this outcome is not unexpected it still nice to see the fruits of your labor, no?"

"And your surprise has to do with that?"

Lehrer clicked his tongue. "Eager boy. I do believe I thought you to be more patient than this, although you were always a bit of a lost cause." Dara couldn't stop that from hurting. "I have to admit I'm excited too. Maybe I should just give it to you. Or do you want to wait?"

No matter how bad the surprise could turn out to be Dara didn't think he would be able to stand the low thrum of fear in his belly and his merciless brain that was proposing worse and worse ideas with every second. "I want to see it now."

"Very well," Lehrer said in a soft tone that made Dara's hair stand on edge. He reached over to the table and showed Dara a long chain. At first Dara assumed it was going to be used in the same way that Lehrer sometimes used his belts. 

The he saw the clip on device at the end of the chain.

A leash.

He flinched backwards. "No."

"Yes," Lehrer said calmly. "Come here."

"Please."

But Lehrer didn't relent. "Quickly, flower."

Dara swallowed and leaned forward, closing his eyes and turning his head to the side so he wouldn't have to see the leash approach. He heard a soft click as it was fastened to the collar.

"There," Lehrer said softly. "That wasn't so bad." The fingers of one hand stroked over his neck again, deceptively gentle, then he yanked Dara downwards with the leash. He did it hard enough that Dara's hands slapped the floor under him to stop his momentum and spare his face from cracking against it. He felt Lehrer's heavy foot land on his back and force him further downward so his forehead was touching the floor. His heart leapt in his throat when he heard Lehrer chuckle and the chain clink softly.

"Please," he begged again. Lehrer ignored him, he tugged hard on the chain so the collar turned around and the ring between the leash and the collar was behind him. The unforgiving metal was digging into his skin. Lehrer pushed down harder between his shoulder blades so he landed on his stomach and started to pull. Dara tried to beg again but nothing came out, the only thing his panicked mind could focus on was desperately trying to gasp for air. When he saw black spots tainting his vision the pressure decreased and he sucked in as much air as he could, coughing. Just when he breathed in again the pressure started to increase. "No-" But Lehrer didn't listen, just kept choking him again and again. Each time a little longer than the rest until Dara was certain Lehrer had decided it was too much trouble to keep him alive and this was foreplay to his murder. Lehrer certainly did seem excited, Dara couldn't see his face but he thought he detected Lehrer's heavier breathing whenever his ears weren't ringing.

Eventually the chain went slack and Dara was left to fight off a panic attack on the floor. Lehrer bend forward to pet his hair and murmur praises to him, whispers of such a good boy, you did so well reaching Dara's ears and he closed his eyes tightly as if that would shut them out. He was crying he realised when Lehrer had grabbed him by the shoulders to sit him upright and wipe his face clean with a cloth. He kept crying and eventually Lehrer gave up and simply forced his head down between his legs. When he was done and Dara had swallowed the bitter taste on his tongue Lehrer smiled at him. "Let's get some food in you." He offered Dara a hand and Dara took it with hesitant, shaking fingers. Lehrer pulled him upright and gently rubbed his back, the other hand unfastening the leash and discarding it on the table.

"Why did you do that?" Dara asked voice rose petal thin.

"Like you said: it only matters if I enjoy it." His gaze seemed to soften somewhat when he met Dara's eyes. "It wasn't that terrible, flower. I already told you that you did fine. Now come with me." Lehrer led him to the kitchen where he could sink down onto a couch as Lehrer fed Wolf. He listlessly stared at the bowl of ambrosia pressed into his hands starting to spoon it into his mouth when Lehrer pointedly nudged it closer.

"How's Noam?" he asked eventually.

Lehrer waved a dismissive hand. "He'll be fine."

"Will be?"

A slow smile curved around Lehrer's lips. "All in good time, Dara."

* * *

Sacha was sitting on his throne, his body was relaxed but there was a tension at the corners of his eyes that betrayed his unease.

 _I wasn't supposed to have lightning_ , Noam realised. _Too fucking bad jackass._

He rolled onto his stomach to push himself slowly upright. Gods, that hurt. He couldn't let Sacha see that though, so he just grinned darkly at the king, his split lip stinging uncomfortably. Then he spit ichor on the ground. " _Fuck. You_."

Sacha looked mildly disgusted at his lack of manners but didn't comment on it. "I assume that Calix send you here to dispose of me." He smiled at Noam's silence. "Did he not tell you to come here? I'm sure he did. Can you recite his exact words to me? See it as a dying man's wish if you will."

He heard screaming from outside and turned to see two winged women standing besides the still form of Tisiphone. One of them had snakes instead of hair, her face contorted in rage. Alecto, he guessed. That left the other that looked nearly normal, with a simple, low cut peplos wrapped around her to be Megaera. Her lips were turned up in a smile that would have been pretty were it not for the fact that her pitch black eyes betrayed that she was a predator. It was crystal clear that both were furious but they didn't attack. Didn't move at all, merely moved closer to the door with hungry eyes and drawn weapons, trapping him but not attacking. Confusion swirled through Noam's gut. Was this a trick? Was Sacha stretching this out so reinforcements could arrive? "He said: you have to eliminate Sacha."

"Hmm." Sacha stroked his chin. "Difficult to get around that one. Even if you didn't have to kill me I do need to need to be rendered harmless. Taken out of the game- which is difficult for a creature with my power."

Noam's confusion only grew. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh. You don't know yet." Sacha seemed incredible self satisfied at this. He enjoyed games, especially when only he understood the rules it seemed. "Our mutual friend hasn't told you. Was that because he didn't want to or because he didn't have time I wonder."

"Dara," Noam ground out.

"Dara," Sacha agreed. "Have you never wondered why he would betray Lehrer?"

"He hates Lehrer."

"Yes, Mister Álvaro. But why does he hate Lehrer? Why would a son want to dispose of his own father? That doesn't happen overnight. Certainly not on this scale. Collaborating with me against Calix Lehrer is high treason. You know the punishment for high treason? Tartarus. That is what would happen if he got caught or I lost. I suppose both have happened," he said it with a bitter smile. "What would have happened if I had won is that his father gets thrown in Tartarus and he gets thrown in right after. Oh, don't look so shocked. He was fully aware of the consequences. Accepted them too, graceful boy that he was. That all seems a bit much to want and accept for mere teenage rebellion, no?"

Noam ground his teeth together. He was half turned towards the Erinyes and half towards Sacha. There was always one opponent just in the corner of his eye, a vague spectre waiting to attack. This was difficult enough without Sacha and his endless rhetorical questions. Dara was mentally unstable right now. With his mind pulled apart in two different directions the consequences would seem acceptable to him. He couldn't trust a word that came out of Sacha's mouth. "I know what you're trying to do. I won't fall for it."

"No. You see everything so clearly, mister Álvaro. I am bad. Lehrer is good. How do you see Dara? It's not relevant but I'm curious." He looked at Noam expectantly, sighing when he didn't answer. "You see him as lost? Confused? Broken, maybe?"

"He's not broken!" Noam burst out with a ferocity that surprised even him.

"He is. He has been broken for years and your so called king is responsible."

"Shut the fuck up. I don't want to play your stupid games."

"No, you just want to play Calix's," Sacha murmured. "But you haven't asked my earlier question. Why would Dara hate his father?"

Noam gritted his teeth. "I don't know." Could he take all three of them? Maybe if he goaded the angry looking one into attacking him he could-

"Have you noticed any of Dara's, hmm, let's call them quirks. Shall we? Avoiding ambrosia, aversion to unexpected physical contact, mysterious bruises? It doesn't really sound like a mere rebelling teen."

"The Persians-"

"Oh for Gaia's sake!" Sacha burst out. "You will truly cut out your own eyes to avoid seeing the truth! This has been going on since years before the Persians ever set foot here."

Noam frowned, "What?"

"Dara is being abused."

"Gordon Ames-"

"Not only by him. It was Lehrer." _Lehrer_.

 _"Don't leave me here,"_ Dara had begged _, "Don't leave me here with him."_

The headache was back with a fervour. He shook his head to clear it. "I don't know what the fuck you're on-"

"Think about it," Sacha hissed. "The flinching, the bruises, the self-destruction. Lehrer got to him years before Gordon Ames."

"You're lying."

Sacha gave him a grim smile. "That's the exact response he received when he told people."

"It can't be true. Someone would have helped." In a perfect world. People would believe it. People would care. Had Dara told him he would have believed him. He would have. But this was Sacha and he would say anything to win.

"Do you really think Calix isn't capable of hurting his own child?" _No_. Sacha must have read it on his face because he smiled. "No one helped. Partly because that simply can't be true about his majesty, partly because of his powers. Do you see my crown?"

Even though a thousand words were buzzing around in Noam's skull he still managed to say, "It's kinda hard to miss. Compensating for something?"

Sacha laughed mirthlessly. "After so much time making yourself _familiar_ with Dara you must recognise his work. Do you now it's purpose?"

Noam's eyes were solely focussed on Sacha now. "Making sure everybody knows you're a piece of shit."

"No, making sure Calix can't influence me. He calls it persuasion. His powers. It's a form of mind control." Noam stared at him blankly. "It's a nasty thing. He doesn't even have to tell you to do something directly he convinces you bit by horrible bit until you think it's your own idea."

That couldn't be true. "No."

"Yes. Have you had any headaches recently? Any thoughts that were out of the ordinary? Any plans that didn't sound like yours? Any actions that you were sure you weren't capable of?" It was ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. It couldn't be true. It was madness in it's purest form. Not even Chaos could have sprung something so vile.

Even so the headache pounded on. It simply wasn't possible. If it was true he was fucked, everyone was. He had doomed himself he had doomed Dara. The image of Dara's tear streaked face came to mind. Noam had never seen him like that before, not even after he killed Gordon Ames. Completely overtaken by uncontrollable sobbing. Like being locked up with Lehrer was damnation in itself.

_-_

_"_ _What do you know about him?" Noam asked._

_Styx sighed, "Only that you have doomed him as much as the people crossing my river. And that I will see him again. One day. I wonder how much of him will be alive."_

_-_

_"Why doesn't he like Lehrer?"_

_Dara laughed. "Because you can't trust Lehrer. He's not what he pretends to be."_

_-_

_"Then tell me," he asked impatiently._

_"I can't. No, don't give me that look. I can't tell you, I want to. Believe me but I can't. Don't trust Lehrer, okay. Don't. He's not who you think he is," Dara said._

-

It fit.

It fucking fit.

Dear gods what had he done.

It fit except Sacha profited immensely from lying.

But Dara had been devastated.

The headache grew and grew until black spots were staining his vision. He had to trust Lehrer. He _had_ to.

From the corner of his eye he saw the sudden flash of wings. He spun around, already raising his arm to throw the kerounos. As soon as he let it go he realised that they hadn't decided to make it a fair fight. The lightning hit Alecto with a deafening roar. She flew back and hit the floor with a wet sounding crack. She didn't get up again.

Noam was flung back too. Further into the throne room, closer to Sacha. He lost his footing again, falling backwards, hands desperately trying to catch themselves. The shockwave threw the last fury back too but she seemed to have anticipated this. It barely threw her off cours. Just enough that Noam had time to get his hands around her neck to prevent her teeth from ripping out his jugular. Megaera was still smiling. But it wasn't close mouthed anymore, not very pretty either. Her mouth was filled to the brim with rows upon rows of teeth. She lunged forward like a dog, forcing him back against the ground even harder. His head bouncing of the marble, making him see stars. His grip slackened for a moment but it was long enough that she nearly got her teeth into his throat. He felt them graze the delicate skin. Trying to push her further backwards but she was unrelenting, snapping hungrily. 

He saw Sacha get up from the edge of his vision and slowly make his way over. The erinye was now scratching open his sides, arms, face. Anywhere to make him loosen his grip for just a moment. 

Sacha was approaching.

He desperately searched around for the well of power that resided within him. A well that was already too empty to his liking. He gathered whatever he could and thrust it forward into his hand making the nerves under Megaera's skin light up with pain. She screeched furiously and jolted back slightly. Enough for Noam to grab the remaining lightning boltand drive it between her snapping jaws.

The result wasn't pretty but it did the deed.

Noam felt the heat scorch his face. Pain rippled through him like a never ending wave. He turned over, ichor dripping onto the floor, to shakily look up at Sacha. He was looking at the wreckage with wide eyes while holding a see-through dagger that glinted oddly. He looked deranged. The blast had thrown him backwards, mussing up his hair and throwing off his crown. "Well, you made quite a scene but I'm afraid that this is truly goodbye." He closed in slowly.

Noam took a deep ragged breath. He had not fought the Persians till he was at deaths door to die on a different kind of marble floor in a pool of his own blood. "Stop. Moving."

Sacha did. Staring at Noam with the unblinking wide gaze of a trapped animal. Noam pushed himself on his hands and knees before slowly standing. Spreading his legs a bit to stop himself from falling over again. Magic sparked at his fingertips as he slowly met Sacha's eyes. "Walk. Don't fucking try anything. I'm only warning you once."

Maybe hearing the warning in his tone Sacha kept walking. Out of the doors, over the still bodies of the furies and through the gates. No one was waiting for them when they stepped out. Noam quickly forcing Sacha to keep walking. Every step hurt but he kept going. There was screaming coming from the Styx but Noam didn't check to see what was going on. 

Tartarus was the other way. He didn't see it yet but he could smell it. Toxic fumes slowly pressing into his lungs. The dark unmoving mist was taking over more and more of his vision and his eyes started watering. Sacha stayed silent. Noam had to follow Lehrer's orders. If what Sacha said was true leaving him alive wasn't exactly profitable anymore. Most of his important pieces had been taken of the board already. And Sacha was still terrible. Even if he killed people only to grow his powers to save himself from Lehrer, he had still killed people. And Noam doubted he would be a just leader if left in charge.

If what Sacha said- what Dara said- was true then he could deal with that later. It was too late to turn back now. If Lehrer was corrupt he would stop him somehow. If Lehrer hurt Dara he would get him somewhere safe but he had to eliminate Sacha. He _had_ to.

It was difficult to peer through the mist but he saw the gaping chasm in the earth. It looked like Gaia had taken a knife and wounded herself horrifically, jagged and uneven. Something that wasn't meant to heal. 

Noam paused, taking in the sight of the massive hole in the centre of the earth. He turned to look at Sacha and his terrified eyes, he couldn't help but feel a tiny spark of vindication at that fear. "I guess this is goodbye. Have fun," he said, voice still hoarse. Then he pushed Sacha over the edge. He screamed then, as he toppled over. Noam watched the black mist engulf him

He stayed quiet, listening intently but Noam didn't hear anything. In fact everything was awfully silent. He stared at the still mist covering the split. He could just turn back. Tell Lehrer that he couldn't do it. That he could go and find Adalwolf himself. He didn't owe Lehrer anything.

Except for his life, immortality, powers and even Dara. He wouldn't have met Dara if he had been mortal. Dara's eyes would have slid right over him to instead catch onto Leo or some beautiful rich stranger that Noam could never compare to. And even if he did see Noam it wouldn't have been for more than a couple of hours, a night maybe, if he was lucky. 

This might be a death sentence, Lehrer tying up all the loose ends. But if Adalwolf was down there he had to try. He started jogging along the edge of tartarus. He was not planning on landing atop Sacha. Even if that would cushion his fall quite a lot. He smiled to himself, then slowed down until he stopped entirely. This must be far enough. He briefly looked up, swearing that he could feel a gaze tracking his movement across this twisted play board. Two immense eyes boring into his, only watching. He closed his eyes and stepped forward, feeling the ground stop under his feet as he took another step. He started falling.

and falling.

and falling.

It didn't seem to end.

At first he felt fear. Maybe this was what tartarus was. Just a bottomless pit were you could only fall and never stop. Then he got bored, that would be lame. Scary but lame. He kept falling in complete darkness for gods knows how long. He sank in a trance like state, he wasn't sure if he slept. Wasn't sure when he noticed something different but eventually he became a little more aware of his surroundings, he didn't know what caused it, maybe the smoke became thicker, the foul smell staining the inside of his nose became more pungent or the silence became less oppressive but he slowly started to notice the difference.

He definitely noticed the difference when he landed. 

All the air was forced out of his lungs at once and he was absolutely sure at least one of his ribs shattered. He blacked out for... he wasn't sure. There was no way to tell how much time had passed in this strange prison. He slowly blinked the stars from his eyes as he sat up. He gritted his teeth to keep quiet against the pain. Everything fucking hurt.

To his right there was laughter, cruel and ravenous, Sacha's blustering mingling with it. Thank fuck they found him first. The guy that was responsible for keeping them trapped was a much bigger catch than some random dirty looking kid. Noam scrambled up to take in his surroundings. The mist was still there, the black haze rendering everything further than a couple of feet away a mystery. Noam squinted his watery eyes but it was still nearly impossible to see. 

The laughter roared, forcing him out of his thoughts. He started to stumble forward as quick as possible, away from the laughing and Sacha's screaming. Lehrer had said that Adalwolf would most likely be near the middle of Tartarus so that's what Noam would try to find. It wasn't extremely difficult to guess where that was, the further he went in the more the mist started moving. First it was merely the wispy ends slowly tangling into each other but after -what he guessed was a few days of travel- the wind started to tug on his clothes and hair. Eventually it became a swirling vortex that Noam had to fight against, he didn't know how he could find Adalwolf in here, it was nearly impossible to stand but he had to try. 

The soundless storm became stronger and stronger until Noam was sure he was going to be blown away. He took another stumbling step and instantly fell to the ground. There was not a single gust of wind, only a figure. The eye of the storm housed Tartarus himself. He was massive, Noam realised dumbly. Almost too vast to comprehend. The cloudy figure sat unmoving, barely even bothering to notice the chaos around him. Noam scrambled together what was left of his bravery and righted himself, squaring his shoulders defiantly, like that would impress this thing. "I am here for Adalwolf," he said firmly. He couldn't be sure but he taught the thing might have angled slightly towards him. "I'm here to take him home."

The creature shifted noticeably this time, the sound shifting with him and Noam's stomach lurched when he realised that the spectre before him wasn't Tartarus but merely the central control unit of this entire place. The thing before him was only a fraction of what he was.

The ground kept shifting, churning and folding until at last it vomited up something that glowed as brightly as the sun. Then Tartarus stilled again.

Adalwolf's spirit was a tangled web of brightly burning and sparking threads, they coiled around each other like veins, crossing and uncrossing, sometimes lighting up or slowly burning out. The heat burned his face but he slowly reached out a hand to grab it anyway. It burned horribly and Noam had to bite his lip hard to keep from screaming. He did it. He fucking did it. Now he only had to make it out of Tartarus.

He wrapped clothe around the pulsing ball of light, covering up the membrane as to not alarm any of the beings that dwelled down here and quickly set off. He would have to climb an awful lot but it would be worth it. He kept going as fast as he could, escaping seemed somehow easier than infiltrating. As he ran black spots began taking over his vision. Shit. He wouldn't make it much longer. He had to rest, he slowed down and squinted into the darkness, he could make out the vague outline of a pile of rocks. Not much shelter but it would have to do for now. He stumbled over and squeezed himself in a crevice. He let his head fall backwards and closed his eyes. He would rest for an hour, just an hour, then he would get moving again he told himself as he felt consciousness slipping away. 

He was so tired.

* * *

Noam looked near death. Pallor nearly matching the white of the linens he was laid under, wounds already bleeding through the badges wrapped around the innumerable wounds he sustained while fighting in the underworld and later travelling Tartarus. Bandages were wrapped around his throat, his arms, his ribs, everywhere. Dara had been scared to death when he had found him unconscious in a shallow cave, but he had been breathing, even if it was with difficulty. He didn't look at home in Sacha's castle, the plain, dark walls only making him paler and more sickly looking.

Dara gently stroked Noam's hair out of his face, trying not to cry at the image of Noam laying pale and still on the bed. Had he been any later he would have died Raphael said. He looked over his shoulder for the other man but didn't see him. A little more wouldn't hurt. Just enough to speed up Noam's healing, Dara would be able to miss it. 

He gently laid a hand on Noam's bare chest, channeling his magic into Noam. Haoma's purpose was to return the world to it's original paradise like state so Dara had a natural affinity for healing, that was the reason Lehrer had taken him as a child. To return his brother to him. Dara wasn't meant to 'waste' it on Noam but Adalwolf had Raphael and Lehrer he would be fine. Noam needed it more.

"You're going to fall over if you keep doing that."

Dara whipped around to face Raphael. "He needs it."

Raphael sighed, "I'm aware. But you can't keep burning through your powers at this rate. Travelling through Tartarus and getting all three of you out of there took a toll on you. You have to be careful otherwise I'll have three patients." His tone was gentle, not mad but Dara felt slightly guilty anyway.

"I- he can't die." He turned back to Noam. "He can't. I don't know what I would do."

"I know. It's okay." Raphael came up behind him, setting his feet down a little harder so Dara could track his motions across the room, and carefully put a hand on his back, rubbing circles between his shoulders when Dara didn't rebuff him. "He will be fine."

"Don't say that. Lehrer has won. What do you think is going to happen now? He's suddenly going to be nice and well adjusted. Either his brother agrees with the things he does and nothing will change or he doesn't and all hell will break loose. From what you told me I reckon Adalwolf is going to be at least a little upset with all this. You think Lehrer is going to let that slide? You think Lehrer is going to let me go? Leave Noam alone?"

Raphael's hand moves up to his hair to comb through Dara's curls. "I'm sorry."

"I know," Dara muttered bitterly. They both fell silent, Raphael gently petting his head and Dara focussing on the rise and fall of Noam's chest. "How's Adalwolf?"

Raphael sighed. "As well as one can expect. He's not conscious yet and who knows in what kind of state he will be when he awakens."

"I'll give you a hint: a bad one," Dara snorted. Raphael sighed again but didn't say anything. Dara went back to fussing with Noam's hair but Raphael gently touched his fingers against Dara's wrist.

"He needs rest."

"I know. I just want to make sure he's comfortable."

"He's young and healthy, he will be fine."

Noam would live but what happened after, Lehrer would sink his claws into Noam's mind again to completely pull him apart. Would Lehrer kill Dara? Make it seem like a suicide? Or maybe a retaliation to feed Noam's hatred towards Persia or whoever Lehrer was fighting after this. Would Lehrer manipulate Noam into seeking solace into his fake warmth, would he rape Noam and make him believe it was a precious gift like he had done with Dara? Would he make Noam forget Dara existed? Or forget that they ever loved each other? Maybe he would keep Dara and alternate between hurting both of them. So many possibilities all of them nightmares. "I need to be alone," Dara whispered. To torture himself with what was to come. To soak in these last quiet moments with Noam so he could cradle them to his chest on the worst nights and try to absorb warmth from them, like shielding a match with your hand to make sure it didn't flicker and die.

Raphael squeezed his shoulder and bend down to press a kiss to his head. Then he bend over Noam and firmly pressed two fingers between his eyes. "It's not a lot but he won't feel as much pain," Raphael said with a sad smile over his shoulder. 

"Thanks," Dara forced out as he gently grasped Noam's hand. He was so tired. Raphael's mind was worrying about him. About Adalwolf and Noam and Calix. It was too much right now. Dara instead focussed on Noam. On his hopes and dreams, his wide grin or mischievous smirk. Or the way he kissed Dara with his entire body, how he needed to make Dara know how much he cared, how much he wanted him and how much he tried to make him feel good. How Noam fell to his knees for him with so much worship in his gaze it made Dara feel holy, like he was the embodiment of every beautiful thing that existed. How he had said 'I love you' when he locked Dara away. How he had thought about him everyday when Dara was locked up, the jewellery, flowers and clothes. The sweet notes left behind in Dara's books.

He couldn't lose that.

He had just squeezed his eyes shut tightly to avoid the horrible reality that was the present when he felt Noam's fingers weakly squeeze his hand. "Hey," Noam said with a hoarse voice. "Don't cry."

Dara immediately leaned closer. "Noam. How are you feeling?"

"Uh-" Noam was interrupted by a wheezing coughing fit. "Not- not good. Shit."

Dara turned away to scramble through the cabinets, eventually finding the nectar and pouring it into a goblet. "Here drink this," he said as he helped Noam sit up and slowly drink. When he was done Dara carefully lowered him down again. "Better?"

"Yes," Noam lied. "Thank you."

"Darling, I can read your mind," Dara reminded him gently. 

"Oh, right." Noam's eyes slid closed and he gave him a lopsided grin. "Sorry, don't want you to worry."

"I know but lying isn't going to help." Noam hummed noncommittally in response. He slid his hand over the sheet in Dara's direction. _Hold me, please_. Dara obliged with a quick upturning of his lips. "Sacha's gone," Dara said to fill the silence. "And Adalwolf seems steady."

Noam's eyes shot open, he tried to jump upright but only succeeded in paining himself immensely. Dara's hands hovered over him, not sure what to do and Noam's mind was- Sacha had talked about- "Does he hurt you?" He didn't need to specify about who he was talking. "Sacha said- and it could be bullshit but-"

"Yes," Dara breathed out.

"In the way that Gordon Ames-"

"Yes." Dara averted his gaze. "He did it first. Not only like that, he beats me and he says such awful things to me-" It all came spilling out like a waterfall.

"Dara," Noam interrupted him, oddly calm. "You have to leave." _He believes me._

He shook his head. "No."

"Yes, he's dangerous, he hurts you. Go. I'll catch up I promise."

Dara smiled sadly. "Where would we go?"  
  
"Persia. No, that's too obvious. Egypt. Further downward. I'll find you."

"You're an awful liar, Noam Álvaro. I won't make it there. You certainly wouldn't. But the thought is nice, isn't it? Us in some faraway country, away from all this mess." Dara held his hands in both of his, squeezing gently.

"Dara," Noam said with urgency painting his voice.

"What would we do there?" Dara asked softly, still smiling.

"Anything you want. Now please go!" Noam begged. Eyes flitting over Dara's face.

"It won't work. I'm not leaving you but thank you for believing me." Dara bend forward to gently press his lips against Noam's. "Lehrer's power is near inescapable. People wouldn't let me leave even if they wanted to." He thought of Raphael's grave face and tired eyes, shoulders always tense like he had to hold the sky up instead of Atlas. Like he had to fight himself for every movement.

"Dara-" Noam's eyes were desperate.

"I'm sorry for whatever he will do to you. I can't stop him."

"Baby-"

"But I love you. Remember that. I love you more than anything. I would hunt down and extinguish every star for you."

"I love you too but you can't stay here," Noam said with thrumming urgency.

"There's nothing else I can do. You're wounded and we're in the middle of the wolf's den. There's no escaping this. Not for us."

"I knew that you weren't completely hopeless, flower." Dara sharply turned around only to see Lehrer standing in the doorway with the same satisfied expression he had on his face ever since Dara heaved himself up out of Tartarus with a half dead Noam and his brothers soul. His eyes nearly alight with triumph. His gaze slid down towards Noam and Dara straightened to his full height, knowing he couldn't protect Noam, wanting to try anyway. Lehrer smiled condescendingly at the gesture. "Are you scared, Dara? Answer me."

Dara took a deep breath. "Yes, I am. Please. Please don't hurt him."

Lehrer slowly approached, like a predator enjoying the prospect of an easy kill and wanting to draw it out just a little more. "Why would I hurt-"

"Because I know what you are, you child rapist abusive piece of shit!" Both Dara and Lehrer froze. Lehrer's gaze shifting little by little to meet Noam's furious ones. He took another step.

"No," Dara said. Lehrer smiled again but there was cruelty this time, eyes not moving away from Noam.

"Be quiet."

"Sir-"

Lehrer flashed across the room to grab his jaw, holding it closed, making Dara balance on the very tips of his toes. "When I tell you to do something you obey, we've had that conversation."

Dara heard movement from behind him, Noam struggling to get up, almost falling off the bed. "Don't touch him," Noam snarled.

"Did he tell you? Or was it Sacha? I suppose it doesn't matter, you've decided to believe him. I am thoroughly aware of how difficult it is to get you to stray off a belief you hold. So I won't bother explaining to you about how this was all Dara's design and I won't tell you about all the cries for attention and desperate spreading of legs that Dara choose to leave out of his sob story because it won't matter to you." Lehrer grinned wryly. He lowered his hand and let Dara sink to the floor again, hand loosely gripping his throat, thumb rubbing a rhythmic pattern over Dara's pulse. Noam snarled again. "Fuck you." Lehrer shot Dara an amused side glance at this, as if to say: _if you insist_.

He pushed Dara away, who fell back against Noam's chest. Noam's arms immediately coming up around him to pull him further back. "No, it doesn't matter," Lehrer repeated softly. "Noam, forget everything Dara and Sacha told you about my 'abuse' of Dara."

"No," Dara whispered. He felt the arms around him go slack. "Noam?" He turned around only to see Noam's unfocussed eyes, looking at his face but not comprehending any of the information that was transmitted to his brain. Gaping holes forming in his memory before Dara's very eyes. "Noam?" He asked again, panic overflowing in his voice. He grasped his face and begged Noam to come back, to _remember,_ repeating his name over and over again but it didn't work. Noam sagged sideways against the pillows, eyes still hazy and blinking rapidly when Lehrer wrenched him away. He had lost _everything_. He didn't know when he started screaming, he only noticed when Lehrer backhanded him across the face to make him stop. His legs gave out and he fell on the floor clutching his cheek.

"Stop. Making. A. Scene." 

Dara heaved in a sobbing breath. "Kill me."

Lehrer gave him a disapproving look. "No."

"You're going to anyway. Why not now?" Dara screamed. 

Lehrer grabbed his face, squeezing painfully into the tender place he had just created. "Because I am not done with you yet." He turned to six gods who were watching the exchange impassively. "Take him away and keep him under surveillance. I do not want him to escape to harm himself in any way."

"Understood, your majesty." They bowed and surrounded Dara, pulling him up by his arms to drag him to the exit. They ignored him when he screamed again, merely continuing to drag him further away from Noam. He saw Raphael storm out of the chamber where Adalwolf was recovering but he was stopped by Lehrer. He could only look at Dara with sad eyes.

The gods dragged him onto Charon's boat and after that to the surface. One of them tried to sooth him in a low voice but when he didn't calm down he simply clamped a leather clad hand over Dara's mouth to keep him quiet. They managed to get him to the palace relatively unseen. Most of Olympus's inhabitants where either down in the underworld to repress any fight that may break out or celebrating the victory, too drunk to realise what was happening right in front of their eyes. 

They threw him into the study, he fell to his knees and immediately tried to turn around, get up, fight them, anything. But they were holding him in place less than a second later. He couldn't fight them anymore, he was too exhausted so he went lax in their grip and let them restrain him. After a while they slowly loosened their grip on him, closely watching for another attack but he didn't have the energy for that so they let him be. He knelt on the ground letting all his emotions flow out of him via the coldness of the marble.

He could only wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I am back. I hope you're still interested in this story. The next chapters will probably come faster than this one. Sorry it took so long. The reason it took so long is partly because I wrote myself into a corner. I wanted Adalwolf into the story so I had to find a way to make it happen. Halfway through the chapter I regretted this immensely bc it meant I had to ask myself "Hey, what do you think hell looks like?" and I had no idea. I wanted something different from the underworld and 'christian' interpretations but also not boring.  
> The other reason is that I had a vague outline at the beginning that doesn't fit the story anymore so we're winging it.  
> The other reason being that I had to do a lot of research on victims of abuse. Kinda difficult to find information on the headspace Dara would be in after suffering it for long periods of time I hope the mix of exhaustion/resignation/anger/shame/wanting affection and approval even if you don't/survival mode was accurate.  
> (also I'm sure most of you know but Lehrer's moments of kindness are not me justifying his behaviour it's me trying to give an accurate portrayal of abuse (which has cycles) and abusers often make sure they are sometimes kind/sweet/lovable to keep the victim in their grasp and to gaslight/manipulate them further) however if I messed up please tell me I will try to educate myself more and fix it.
> 
> Ask me about the way Lehrer gaslights/manipulates Dara and why. Notes don't have enough room to explain. I hate him so much it's unreal. He's so bad. Fuck Lehrer. (If you love him as a character it's completely fine. He is very well written. And charming sometimes damnit why did he have to be a pedophile and rapist-)
> 
> (also do you see whats happening? It's all coming together)
> 
> Side note: I'm not stopping this story. It makes me very happy and I am excited for the ending, just not very good at writing everything in-between the start and finish. I think that writing is good for me and I should make myself do it more often. (even if I make Lehrer ask way too many rhetorical questions)  
> As far as we know greeks didn't put collars on their slaves. Romans did sometimes if the slave had run away. Greek slaves seemed to be able to mingle with the regular population pretty well so they probably didn't have any distinct features (besides maybe looking foreign if they were kidnapped from a different country.)
> 
> Greeks didn't have clip on leashes. They did invent the spiked collar to protect the dogs from predators.
> 
> Gold is a soft metal. However the collar is enchanted so Dara can't bend it.
> 
> The explanation I've decided on for last names is that they are ephitets. Those are essentially extra names the gods have to connect them to their sphere of influence. For example Pallas Athena means Virgin Athena. Explaining that she was a virgin goddess. So Lehrer is basically Calix's way of saying 'I am your teacher and you should learn from me.' bc Lehrer means Teacher in German. (still can't get over that his name means 'hot teacher')  
> Noam has a last name bc he is human.  
> I forgot if I ever gave Dara his last name but if he has one it means that he manifested near the city of Shiraz.
> 
> Also random but I have started on a new multi chapter fic. Kinda royalty au thingy but I am also trying this new thing called outlining so you won't see it for a good while.
> 
> If you want to know more about mythology/history/classic literature I recommend the youtube channel overlysarcasticproductions. They are entertaining and very good at teaching you all kinds of stuff from the Iliad to Japanese mythology to 1984. If you don't want to read all the myths bc it's too long/boring I think you'll enjoy this. They use a lot of humour and drawings.


	11. "My dear, my dear,

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You should be resting." Noam turned away form the window to see Lehrer standing in the doorway with a small smile on his face.
> 
> and
> 
> "Ah, Dara. Please meet Adalwolf Lehrer."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you haven't lost interest. Sorry updates are so slow.
> 
> One day i’ll go back to fix all the mistakes I made in this fic but today is not that day.
> 
> Adalwolf has black hair and eyes in the book and looks like Lehrer in the webtoon so he has black eyes and blond hair in this.
> 
> The assume I am talking about the person when I don't specify its the dog please
> 
> Warnings  
> Just regular Lehrer stuff  
> Mentions of insanity and characters being mentally ill.  
> Nightmares  
> Attempted sexual assault  
> Mentions of suicide in the story and me talking about how suicide was viewed in Ancient Greece at the very end of the notes.

Noam was listlessly staring out of the window. He could just make out the river Styx, broad and ominous. The lifeless pale people bumbling around the Asphodel fields and behind that the inviting warmth of Elysium. Noam slid his eyes back downward to Asphodel and it's inhabitants that were forever aimlessly wandering over the flattened grass. Were his parents there? Would they be able to find one another? Would they wait on the shores for him? Would they have the presence of mind to do any of that?

He would have ended up there, if he had died as a mortal. He wasn't a hero or had devoted his life to a god. He was just another too skinny boy in a shitty neighbourhood. And he would have been doomed to spend his life not living right over there after he inevitably got sick or starved or got run through by some goddamn enemy soldier. It didn't seem fair. Most people couldn't do extraordinary things with their lives. They were busy trying to make rent or raising their kids. In Athens women weren't even allowed outside the house, not that it stopped them entirely from doing just that, how were they supposed to complete some godly quest? Slaves were bound to their masters and children were only children, yet they were all stuck in there and it simply wasn't right.

Sacha was gone. Something he had been working toward for so long had finally happened but people were still suffering only to die and suffer more. Punished for living a hard life by being miserable for all of eternity. Very fitting.

"You should be resting." Noam turned away form the window to see Lehrer standing in the doorway with a small smile on his face.

"I am," he said petulantly.

Lehrer stepped into the room and closed the door behind him, slowly approaching the bed Noam was laying on. "I can hear you thinking from here." Lehrer said it with a teasing smile but it still made Noam avert his eyes in embarrassment.

"Well, I'm thinking while laying in bed. That can't hurt too badly." Lehrer hummed noncommittally while pulling out a chair to sit in. They both watched the people on the ground in a comfortable silence. "How's your brother?" Noam asked eventually.

"Still unconscious," Lehrer sighed. "But he's making progress." He gave Noam a tired smile, in quiet moments like this he had started to drop his walls a bit, Noam didn't know if it was because Lehrer trusted him or because Noam's own current vulnerability had inspired the new closeness but it wasn't unwelcome.

Noam swallowed. "And Dara?"

Lehrer sighed again. "He will be fine. He's upset now of course but hopefully the retreat of the Persians will calm him down. If it doesn't, well..." He squared his shoulders. "We will find some way to help him. I have not been a good father, I'm afraid. Dara's wellbeing always took a backseat to my reign but I promise you, Noam, that I will do everything in my power to ease his pain." His eyes were steady and earnest when he said this.

Noam forced an attempt at a smile. "What's he been doing?"

Lehrer shrugged, averting his eyes again. "Helping with Adalwolf and catching up with Raphael. I'm afraid I'm not entirely sure, he still avoids me like the plague. I'm not sure that will ever change," he said quietly.

"I know about persuasion." Lehrer's eyes flashed up to him again. "I'm not going to tell anyone."

Lehrer stared at him for a long moment, it was refreshing to see him surprised. Then he nodded slowly. "I know you won't."

Was that persuasion? "Have you ever used it on me?" Lehrer immediately shook his head, causing Noam to smile wryly.

"Do you think I'm lying?"

"I don't know. I figured you would say that whether you actually did it or not," Noam shrugged. Lehrer only sighed.

"Trust me, Noam." And Noam did, of course. But he wasn't stupid. "I need you to trust me. Because I trust you. And I need people I can trust, especially now." Lehrer huffed out a laugh. "In a short period of time two out of three of the domains have been undone of their leader. I need people I can lean on to take their place. I already have someone for the seas but I'm afraid people shy away from the underworld. They aren't willing to make the sacrifices it takes to rule a place like this." Lehrer's piercing eyes were boring into him.

Noam looked down at the sheet. "Are you asking me what I think you're asking me?"

"Yes." Lehrer laid hand on top of Noam's. "I'm sorry," he said in a soft tone. "But I think you're the only one who's able to do such a task. You know sacrifice."

Noam looked up again, seeing Lehrer's grave face. "Okay."

Lehrer squeezed his hand and gifted him a smile. "Thank you."

* * *

His robes were made of a thick fabric that was more expensive thank all the things he had owned in his mortal life added up. They were dark and dreary, just like everything else down here. Noam scoffed, pretentious. He understood that image was important but all black made him look even angrier than he already did on a daily basis. Nothing he could change about it now though.

He sighed deeply and straightened himself in the mirror, fussing with the layers of clothe wrapped around him.

A hesitant knock on the door. "It's time." Noam gave himself one last look in the mirror before stepping out of the dressing room and into the hallway.

 _Why is every damn thing in here dark and gloomy?_ Noam thought loudly. He didn't know why he did it, Dara was too far away to hear him but Noam still thought things loudly into the silence sometimes. Like he would somehow hear Noam and it would cheer him up. _Stupid_ , he thought.

 _Naive_ , he heard Dara call back.

Noam shook his head clear of him. He needed to focus on what was going to happen. He had to be perfect. Not a single hair out of place. He needed to look strong so the transition of power would be as smooth and unopposed as possible. 

He reached the double doors that led to the throne room, he could hear whispering coming from behind it and sighed again. 

"Are you ready?" a spirit asked him quietly. Noam nodded once and glared at the doors. He could beat Sacha so he could beat walking down an aisle while people stared at him so a piece of metal could be put on his head.

The doors opened and Noam stepped through them. Everyone was looking at him, like flowers turning towards the sun. Lehrer standing at the end with a grave face, the crown held on a cushion by another god next to him. Noam decided to focus on him and no one else. He took a step. _Don't trip._ He took another. _Don't blush._ And another. _And **never** let them see any weakness._

When he reached Lehrer he knelt and bowed his head, the masses behind him holding their breath. "Do you swear," Lehrer's melodic voice began, "To remain loyal to me, to rule this kingdom fairly and to never revolt?"

"I do," Noam said, like the words were ripped out of him. 

Lehrer placed a hand under his chin to tip his head up before he placed the crown on Noam's hair. "Then rise, king of the underworld." And as the crowd burst into applause behind him Noam did.

There was a feast afterwards.

With wine and dance and beautiful people that had never looked at Noam twice before fluttering their eyelashes at him. All Noam could think about was how much Dara would have loved this, how beautiful he would have looked bathed in the lights of the torches and how much fun he would have made of Noam's new, stupid crown. He would have stolen it from Noam's head in one cocky gesture and told Noam that he looked a bit too stern in silver. Or that he couldn't believe Noam would wear this because he knew Dara preferred gold and now they would clash all the time. Noam's stomach folded itself in a ball at that thought and he glared at his wine to hide his anguish from all the eyes burning into him.

"Don't like it? I brought my best just for you." He turned his head to see Leo studying him.

"It's fine," he said, tone too curt. He cleared his throat. "I like it."

Leo raised his eyebrows. "If you say so."

Noam shuffled his feet, Leo was not the right person to take his frustrations out on. "It's not the wine, I just don't like parties."

Leo laughed. "You and Dara aren't a very good match on that front then." Noam averted his gaze again. Hearing the name left him raw for some reason. "How is he?"

"Good," Noam said quickly. "Fine."

"Yeah, I'm sure he's having so much fun hanging out with Lehrer." Leo said it mildly but there was a calculated cut to the words. Noam's eyes flitted back up and Leo must have seen the warning or the pain or something because he didn't complain when Noam changed the subject.

"How did you two become a thing?" It was something he had wondered for a while now.

Leo leaned back against the wall, casually swirling the wine around in his goblet. "Well, I was a new god. God of parties and drinking and all that good stuff so we met at one of those." He gestured vaguely as if to say, as you do. "He liked to go home with people. Or, you know, you get what I'm saying. The thing is: I don't allow wasted people to hook up at my parties. I know. I'm such a hero. Stopping rape." He gave Noam a dry smile before he grew serious again. "I had to stop people multiple times from trying to take advantage of him, wasn't appreciated, got called quite a few names but he was generally alright after I brought him back to his friends or put him down with a group of dryads somewhere. Did you know he could braid? He was very popular with them. I guess it was the flowers or something. He seemed to hate me but he did keep coming back to my parties so I don't know. Eventually he pulled me aside to tell me that I was not stopping him from getting laid that night and I told him I had no problem with him sleeping with people while not drunk. And he told me to prove it. So," he shrugged, "We had sex. He was sweet when we started talking more, I don't know why that surprised me. We began to form a friendship after that and slept together a couple of times."

"When did all this happen?"

"I only know him a couple more months than you. I guess they needed new blood," Leo said, nodding at the gods gathered in the hall. Noam didn't miss the word choice. They. Like he and Leo were different from them. He supposed they were.

"You also die in someone else's war?" Noam asked bitterly.

"No, godly quest." Leo shrugged when Noam looked at him for elaboration. "Some lord either got ordered on a godly quest or took a godly quest, I wasn't important enough to know the details, everyone got slaughtered by the monster we were supposed to defeat, I lived and completed the quest because of self preservation or maybe I hoped the gods would give me my dead friends back. Didn't get that but, hey, can't really complain." He sarcastically gestured down his body. Noam didn't know what to say to that. "I have to admit I did lose it for a little while. Becoming immortal wasn't easy on my psyche. Probably why my powers are what they are."

Noam frowned. "Partying?"

Leo laughed. "It's also madness. I guess the wine part got added because intoxication is a state in which you don't have your wits about you. It has it's uses, I know when people are mentally ill or not entirely there."

Anger raised up in Noam's stomach. "Why didn't you help Dara?"

He pressed his lips together and Noam saw him look around quickly without moving his head. "Because Dara is fine," he said in a low voice.

Noam shook his head. "He's far from fine."

Leo breathed out hard through his nose. "He isn't. But there was never a tremendous shift in his psyche that I could see. He suffered from melancholy and addiction the entire time I met him and that hasn't changed. Nothing changed actually. What was the official story again? Had a mental breakdown because the Persians were purposely praying too him in the hopes of turning him on the greeks?"

"He was being influenced by them, yes."

Leo shrugged. "Didn't notice anything."

Noam took a very careful breath so he wouldn't strangle someone at his own party. "What?" he asked in a flat tone after a careful pause.

"There were no shifts in his personality. I've gotten pretty good at recognising them. No signs of his mind being 'torn two different directions' or whatever they are saying is happening."

"When did you get good at recognising shifts in personality?" Noam asked. What did that have to do with anything.

Leo looked at him. "They're quite common here."

"Yeah? Like who'd it happen to?"

"You." Noam stood very still as Leo sipped his drink, casual as anything.

"What do you mean?" 

Leo shrugged. "Was I unclear?" Noam didn't say anything. "Just be careful. And keep this information in mind." Noam stared at the floor. He knew Lehrer lying was a possibility but it still felt like a punch in the gut. He remembered Lehrer telling him to get rid of Sacha, the flash of irritation in his eyes every time he asked after Dara and something else. It felt like an itch in the back of his throat, like when you know that you've forgotten something but you don't know what it is. He remembered Dara being so upset that he could barely speak when he was left in Lehrer's rooms. He vaguely remembered waking up to see Dara sitting next to him, he remembered feeling anger and only flashes of everything after that.

Lehrer had left quickly after the party started but his supporters were still there. _Act normal._ So Noam smiled and drank and pretended he was having a fantastic time. And when it was finally over he went to Sacha's old room, his room now he supposed, and stood in front of the mirror to study himself again. He didn't look sixteen anymore, Lehrer had told him that he wasn't sixteen anymore. That the experiences had made him much older than his age and he was right, Noam's eyes looked old. Tired. 

But there were still things he had to do. Lehrer had told Noam that he trusted him, that Noam was the _only_ person he trusted besides himself. He had given Noam power, he couldn't do that and then secretly continue to be the boss behind the scenes. Noam was no puppet king or a child that needed to be watched every step. With Lehrer's powers Noam could never be sure that he was doing what _he_ thought was right.

He told himself it wasn't treason if it was only disobeying the king to help him. Besides, Noam was a king now too. 

He knew there was a way to stop Lehrer. Dara had managed it for Sacha and presumably himself too. Or maybe he hadn't needed to stop it. Dara told him he couldn't use his telepathy on Lehrer, did that mean that Lehrer couldn't influence Dara? It had to otherwise Dara wouldn't have been able to revolt to the point he had. Sacha had a crown to stop Lehrer but something like that would be too obvious so he would have to do it without a physical object which was presumably possible, if Dara was able to embed the magic necessary into the crown he should have been able to perform the magic stand alone in the first place. Or Noam assumed that's how it worked, not like he could ask. The crown was possibly made so Dara wouldn't have to concentrate and draw from his magic all the time. Or maybe Sacha didn't want to take the risk that Dara died or turned on him.

Lehrer's power seemed to be psionic which meant Noam also needed something like that to disturb it. The alternative was blowing out his eardrums and he wasn't going to try that unless he didn't have any other options. 

He needed a shield of some sort, something that would block Lehrer out without being obvious. He glared at his reflection, he hated working with so little information but there was no way of getting more that wasn't highly suspicious so he would just have to fucking do it.

He tried for hours. Drawing his magic around him, trying for some combination that would protect him and having no way of knowing if it was right. He wouldn't know until Lehrer persuaded him to do something and then only if he could catch the command. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, what was he thinking? For all he knew Leo was just playing a joke and he had squinted at himself standing around in too heavy robes for nothing.

He started to pull of his clothes in short angry gestures before kicking them away and turning around to go into his bathroom. He felt slightly better when he sank into the bath, he tipped his head back and closed his eyes, letting the anger flow away with the steam. Of course that was the moment a servant found it necessary to barge in and disrupt his peace. "Your majesty! We were worried-"

"Stop talking," Noam hissed. The boy clamped his mouth shut quickly, a look of fear passing over his face. "Why are you here?" The boy shifted uneasily. "I asked you a question," Noam said, his tone was getting colder by the minute. The boy was shifting became more frantic, his eyes flitting around as his face was overtaken by terror. "Answer me!" 

"Your majesty, we were worried because we couldn't find you anywhere!" the boy rambled. Noam felt ashamed of himself all of a sudden, the child couldn't be older than thirteen.

"Why didn't you just say so?" he asked, trying to be gentle but probably sounding gruff.

"I couldn't!" he squeaked. "Your majesty!" was added hastily. 

Noam had to resist rolling his eyes. "Why not?"

"You said I couldn't and then I couldn't."

"Because I am your lord," Noam said sarcastically.

"No, sire. I couldn't. I literally could not." The boys eyes were earnest and still wide with fear. 

"Go," Noam said eventually. "Tell them to continue to search for my parents and don't tell anyone about what happened here." The boy nodded and turned, quickly walling away. Noam heard him start running as soon as he was out of sight. He tipped his head back and slowly licked the taste of magic from his teeth. Could it be? 

He pushed himself out of the bath, quickly drying himself and throwing on a chiton before taking his place in front of the mirror again. He had to keep trying.

It was hours before the servants found him wide eyed and shaking on the floor.

* * *

Dara was staring up at the sky, there were no clouds today and it looked like a vast nothing, like if Dara undug his nails from the sand he would fall upward. He heard someone sigh beside him, low and untroubled. A man but Dara didn't dare to look, too afraid to see who it was. The man didn't let him guess as he felt someone tug at the necklace around his neck. Tighter and tighter until Dara was struggling to breath. Gordon Ames's face appeared into his view, hands tugging the string of pearls that he had wrapped around Dara's neck tighter. "You like that?" His eyes glinted excitedly. Dara tried to speak but air couldn't get past the pressure on his windpipe. He shook his head but the man either didn't see it or didn't care. "I know you want this, filthy slut. Begging to be bend over at every chance you get. So desperate that even the king of the gods couldn't satisfy your lust. Had to stray to look for more cock," Gordon laughed.

Dara's vision was getting fuzzy and sound seemed far away but he still felt Gordon push up his chiton. He started struggling but the man ignored him, so he tried to crawl away, hands fisting uselessly in the sand until he hit something hard and sharp. The harpe.

He kicked Gordon off of him at the same moment that he closed his hand around the handle. The man hit the sand with a dull sound, Dara was on top of him before he could recover and he hurried the blade in his chest. "Dara," Noam croaked out as red started to well out of the wound.

"No. No, no, no. You were- I thought you were- It's fine, I'll fix you." Dara's hands were shaking as he tried to figure out what to do. Pressure on the wound. Pressure on the wound. But it was Noam's heart. Would that even work?

The answer didn't matter because two hands grabbed Dara's upper arms and dragged him away. As he was thrown in the sand he could hear Noam's quick breaths turn difficult and painful. He tried to scramble back to him but a weight pressed him flat to the ground. "Calm down, flower. I just need a moment of your time," Lehrer's pleasant voice whispered in his ear. Lehrer was pulling off his clothes but all Dara could focus on was the fact that Noam had started coughing up blood. He scrambled against the sand to get back to Noam - to help him, to hold him. Anything- but he couldn't get a grip and only seemed to sink further into the sand with each searing press of Lehrer's hands in his skin. He sank deeper and deeper until Lehrer's hands fell away and he was engulfed into the earth and there was only Gaia's echoing voice saying, _Mine._

The was falling again, wind tugging at his hair, when he looked to his right two eyes as black as his own were boring into him. The man smiled a smile that had madness carved into every crevice of it. "Nephew," he said. "How nice of you to join me."

Dara didn't wake up screaming. Even if he was terrified that he would open his eyes to see a deathly pale face grinning at him but his room was empty and Adalwolf was still unconscious. Presumably.

Was that real? It had felt different from the rest of the dream, he knew that titans were disliked because of their unpredictability. Secret loving fickle things. Lehrer had never said anything about his brother having abilities tied to dreams, but Lehrer didn't talk much about his family, not to Dara. And titans always seemed to know too much. Maybe he picked it up in tartarus, having so much time alone with your thoughts must be the perfect time to develop new abilities. Dara shuddered, whatever Adalwolf had done he couldn't have deserved that. Not if Raphael still looked at him with such soft worry after all this time.

Dara didn't know what Lehrer was thinking sending Noam into tartarus. He knew Noam couldn't do it, not if he had to fight Sacha first. Even if Noam had been in peak condition it would have been unlikely that he made it back or found Adalwolf. He was powerful but so new and unprepared, it would have been impossible for even Lehrer. The only reason Dara stood a chance was that Tartarus was Gaia's consort and she would have been cross if he died. The poor guy probably didn't want to end up like her first husband.

Gaia must have been the reason that Dara made it out of Tartarus so easily, she must have asked or commanded that her latest husband let him through. Had she asked the same for Noam? Was she aware of Dara's love for him? She had attributed his hesitancy to stay with her to his love for the stars but she wasn't stupid. Had she decided to let Dara keep Noam. Anisedora Gaia. Giver of gifts.

Dara had never intended to go into tartarus. Or at least never intended to come back, certainly not with Adalwolf. Lehrer must have figured that and send Noam instead, Dara would do anything for Noam. They both knew that.

Always two steps ahead.

How long had he been planning this? Possibly ever since he figured out Dara's attraction, as he called it. Maybe he did so because Lehrer couldn't fathom love. Although he did seem to care about his brother. His version of love, Dara assumed.

He stretched out slowly on the bed, careful not to turn his head in a way that made the collar dig into his neck. Falling asleep had been easier the last couple of days. Lehrer had been focussed solely on his brother, there was no time for him to visit Dara. The knowledge that Lehrer's attention would be elsewhere for at least a little while made the weight Dara was constantly carrying ease up slightly, he still had to be wary of course, there was no way of knowing how long Adalwolf would keep Lehrer's attention or what would happen if he didn't wake up soon.

Raphael said Adalwolf seemed to be in a stable condition, he had taken on a physical form. A tall blond man whose chest rose and fell so slightly that you could easily miss it. He hadn't opened his eyes yet and while Lehrer had been elated at the situation at first he was now getting impatient. Which made him dangerous.

He hadn't decided to blow off steam using Dara as either a punching bag or for other purposes but he could not be certain of how long that would last, Lehrer had always refused to be predictable.

It was also possible that he had deemed both Raphael and Dara important enough to Adalwolf's wellbeing to keep them both healthy and unharmed. He had been even more watchful over the amount of ambrosia Dara ate and had urged him to not stay up too late reading. The last couple of days had been almost pleasant, the most Lehrer demanded of Dara was to kneel prettily next to his chair while he absentmindedly turned the leash over in his hands or stroked long fingers through his hair. ("You are so lovely. Better than any hetaera I could have picked," he whispered after he had come back to the apartment as he clasped the collar back around Dara's neck. Dara just buried his fingers tighter into Wolf's fur.) Even Raphael had it easier, he didn't quite have the same hunted and anxious expression he always seemed to have after prolonged exposure to Lehrer but Dara wasn't sure whether that was because Lehrer had been leaving him to his own devices or because he knew Lehrer had been keeping away from Dara.

He had no idea what would happen after this, surely Lehrer must have planned something, Dara couldn't fathom waiting thousands of years without having a plan. Thousands of years to raise his expectations, Dara shuddered. Lehrer would be furious if Adalwolf didn't wake up, he would also be furious if Adalwolf hated him for the things he had done. Although he could fix the latter one easily, possibly even the former, Dara thought he had known the extent of Lehrer's power but he had clearly been wrong. If he could make someone forget he might be able to wake someone up. And after that? Would he step down for Adalwolf? How long would he be content to not have all the power? How long before he started influencing his brother again?

Dara didn't want to see that.

He stared out if the window to the east. Maybe, he thought, maybe the Persians and their gods were still close enough and they will hear me. It was a childish thing to think. He remembered being twelve and neglected except for the beatings Lehrer occasionally bestowed on him and falling to his knees in front of his window as he begged to be taken back. He remembers being fourteen and kneeling shakily as he begged for Ahura Mazda to please let him go back home, telling him that he was so, so sorry. Remembers being sixteen as he desperately tried to feel a connection to Hoama, hoping that maybe they would feel him too and lead him back to someplace better. But no-one answered and he didn't feel anything. Eventually he just accepted that he was too changed or ruined or far away to go back and stopped praying to anything.

Haoma was supposed to bring the world back to it's paradisal state but everything Dara touched withered.

He wished he had known better then, when he toddled around on brand new feet sprouting plants in his wake, wished he had known to run when the pale stranger with the odd eyes had scooped him up and taken him away. But he had looked kind and smiled at Dara as he picked him up and Dara hadn't known to be afraid. He was merely curious as they travelled away to a different land with different people. His only clue to something being wrong was the sky bursting apart into a cacophony of violence when they stepped on greek soil. Dara had tried to go back for this surely meant that Ahura Mazda was displeased but Lehrer had only carried him further along. Dara should have tried harder to leave but after that the man introduced him to his wolf and gave him sweets and told him that they were a family now even though Dara knew that was incorrect but Dara hadn't wanted to go anymore. He brought it up once a couple of weeks later but as soon as he mentioned going back home the man had looked so heartbroken that Dara had apologised and vowed to not speak of it again. And when he finally realised his mistake and tried to go home he was too twisted to go back.

He had asked once, how Lehrer could have stolen him from Harvasp-âgâh, Omniscient, and Lehrer had said that maybe he simply wasn't that important to Ahura Mazda. Those words had carved themselves into Dara's brain even when he figured out that Lehrer had to have asked Angra Mainyu for help.

None of it mattered now, even if he did go back he would never fit in. And he couldn't leave Noam here to entangle himself further into Lehrer's trap, he knew what would happen if he left.

He was pulled from his thoughts by a soft noise from the other side of the hallway, Raphael softly talking to someone. He was next to Adalwolf's bed, next to another frail presence. Dara rolled off the bed to see what was going on. Slowly pushing against the door to peek inside, freezing when two black eyes pinned him down. Raphael turned away from the bed to see him standing there. He looked tense but tried to keep it out of his tone. "Ah, Dara. Please meet Adalwolf Lehrer."

"You are Calix's son," Adalwolf rasped, voice hoarse from disuse. He wasn't blinking or looking away from Dara, who began to see closing the door and running back to his room as a more and more appetising option. Adalwolf reminded him of Styx, they had the same dead gaze that seemed to say, _I have a secret._

"You're his brother" he asked instead of doing the smart thing and running. Gods, who was he? Noam?

The man on the bed shrugged. "You tell me." For some reason that pissed Dara off. Although he looked calm their was a something feral hidden just around the corner of his mind. It was like a big glass lake it tried to seem calm and safe but Dara knew there were things hiding under it, he was afraid of going further in.

Raphael was carefully looking between them. Looking for signs of a mental breakdown or attempted murder. "You two have met?" he asked slowly.

Adalwolf just smiled and Dara raised his chin slightly as a challenge. "I've nightmared about him," he said humourlessly. It was a phrase he made up when he was nine, because dreams were pleasant so there ought to be a verb to say you dreamed unpleasantly. Raphael's mouth twitched up in a small smile, it brought him relief whenever Dara acted young, confirmed in his mind that Lehrer hadn't broken him entirely.

"I like your necklace," Adalwolf said slowly. "It clashes with the bruises though."

Dara chuckled humourlessly. "Yes, it's funny because your dearest brother gave me both."

Adalwolf didn't look shocked or started shouting about lies, merely nodded his head. Slowly. Like everything else he had done, like he was remembering how to. "I thought he might have." He shifted his head back to look at Raphael. "I asked you to help Calix."

Raphael snorted dryly. "And Calix told me to help him. Both of you have very different opinions on what helping him entails and as much as I would have liked to follow your orders only one of you can make me listen." He heaved a shuddering sigh. "I'm sorry. I tried, I did. But I couldn't- he wouldn't let me. He's a lost cause, Wolf."

"Agree to disagree," Adalwolf said as he slowly heaved himself upwards. _Calix can be fixed._ Oh, if only he knew. He groaned loudly in pain, which caused Raphael to step in and gently try to coax him back towards the bed.

"You just came back from the dead. You are not moving," he hissed as his eyes started to glow and his hear gently floated up from his shoulders to wave around his head.

"I just have to do a couple of things. After that you can tie me to the bed and feed me soup all you like." Adalwolf was still trying to sit up and while Raphael could easily overpower him right now he also didn't want to dislocate any of Adalwolf's bones.

"No," Raphael said, still pressing healing into Adalwolf's skin.

"Aight, aight, aight," Adalwolf sighed as he let himself be forced back to the bed. "Let me do one thing then. I won't even have to move from the bed."

Raphael squeezed his eyes shut and muttered something unfriendly under his breath. "Gods, fine." His eyes were closed so he didn't see Adalwolf grin and lean forward to kiss Raphael hard. Dara saw Raphael's eyes fly open as he tried to process what was happening. He didn't move, not even when Adalwolf broke the kiss and slowly pulled back to look him in the eye. He smirked but couldn't quite hide the blush on his cheeks.

"Sorry about that, angel. Been thinking about that for a while now and just couldn't resist." He leaned back further to thud back against the bed.

"I- you- I- you never- I thought, um." Raphael swallowed hard and seemed make a valiant effort to gather his thoughts. "You don't need to be sorry. It wasn't, it wasn't unwelcome."

Adalwolf raised his eyebrows. "You're not going to tell me to take you to dinner first?" He grinned when Raphael coughed out a short laugh. "Am I welcome to do it again sometime?"

Raphael scrunched up his eyebrows. "Maybe. When you're not my patient. And when you're awake for longer and in a stable place."

The grin didn't leave Adalwolf's face. "Good to know. I'll remember that. Hopefully next time we can do it without a kid staring at us." Then he grew serious again. "Now, if you don't mind, I have to speak to my darling little idiot brother."

"Wolf, he's changed," Rapael warned lowly. "He's done despicable things for no reason other than his own pleasure. He's not who you remember." He isn't allowed to tell him, Dara realised. Lehrer ordered him to keep quiet about the abuse. Does that mean he will believe me?

"Well, I'm still gonna talk to him. It has to happen." Adalwolf shrugged lightly but his eyes seemed to have gotten darker.

Raphael pressed his lips together tightly but nodded once as he rose from the bed to find Lehrer, he gave Dara a warning glance as he carefully brushed past him into the hallway, stay with him. Dara watched him leave the chambers before turning back to Adalwolf and raising an eyebrow. The blond huffed and said, "Nephew."

Dara crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Don't call me that."

Adalwolf's eyes fell half shut as if he was bored but his eyes were sharp. "Why not?"

Dara narrowed his eyes at him. "It implies that I am your brother's son."

"And this is an incorrect assumption?"

"Yes," Dara said decisively, steadily ignoring the part of him that felt sadness at this.

"What are you, then?" Adalwolf asked.

 _His whore._ "A tool."

Adalwolf tipped his head back to look at the ceiling, finally shifting his eyes away from Dara. "A tool whose purpose is resurrecting me." Dara nodded. "A purpose which you have fulfilled. So what happens to you now? Will he get rid of you?"

Dara shrugged. "If I'm lucky." Adalwolf's eyes flicked back towards him at that. He opened his mouth to speak again but his gaze snagged onto something over Dara's shoulder.

He frowned. "Calix?" The image of a young child reading a book that was almost bigger than him, the feeling of desperation while looking over bodies left in the wake of destruction (Where are you? Where did they take you? Are you alive?) The shock at seeing a brittle boy with a scarred face. The horror at being ordered to your own ruination without any chance of fighting back. The knowledge that everything is wrong and it's because of you. All of it flitted behind Adalwolf's mind in such quick succession it made Dara dizzy, causing him to nearly fall over when Lehrer shot past him to get to his brother. He grabbed him by the upper arms knuckles turning white and it must be hurting Adalwolf but neither of them seemed to care, too busy with looking each other over. Lehrer with wonder and Adalwolf with incomprehension. Like the man in front of him was a stranger. He probably was.

"Wolf," Lehrer croaked out. Dara had thought that Lehrer had looked broken after he tried to kill himself but that had been nothing compared to this. "Say something."

Adalwolf opened his mouth closed it and then opened it again to say, "Did you name your dog after me or is he just called that because he's a dog?"

Lehrer laughed and Dara was stunned to see so much genuine emotion from him. He didn't think that was possible. Not for you, it isn't, a vicious voice whispered to him. He swallowed harshly.

"He's named that because he's a wolf."

"And also because of me, don't lie to me. There's no reason for you to be so uncreative otherwise," Adalwolf said with twinkling eyes, clearly trying to suppress a grin and failing. And Dara suddenly felt like he was an intruder, he backed away slowly and slowly closed the door. The brothers didn't notice, too caught up in each other to see anyone else.

And if seeing Lehrer so happy and alive to see his family made him ache deep inside then that was no ones business but his own.

* * *

The next couple days were strange.

Lehrer was happy, actually happy, not the pale imitation of it he had sometimes shown to Dara. Adalwolf was making strides an both seemed to be drifting on a pink cloud. The need to hope that everything would be good now clashed incessantly with the constant wariness that Dara had become so familiar with. Lehrer had gone longer periods of time behaving so well only for it to burst in one foul sweep seemingly without reason. The first couple of months had been incredible , all the little dips that had started to appear had been written of by stress or Dara doing something wrong. They had been good enough that Dara had almost thought of Lehrer and him as a romantic couple, good enough to push down the knowledge that having this kind of relationship with your dad was wrong.

Dara was waiting for those little dips to start appearing, for Lehrer to realise that having his brother back was not all that he had told himself it was, that he actually didn't want to give up power or for Adalwolf to stop playing by the rules but it hadn't happened yet. Lehrer hadn't shown a single crack but Dara could feel something building under Adalwolf's skin, something traumatised and angry.

Somehow he was still surprised when it happened.

He could hear angry voices from Adalwolf's room, Adawolf shouting and cursing and Lehrer in that infuriating 'I know you are being unreasonable and I am always right' tone he loved to use on Dara. Dara crept closer, spying on Lehrer wasn't wise but he would rather have an idea of how bad his mood was going to be.

"I didn't fucking want this! So stop with you 'I'm doing this for you bullshit' because we are both fully aware of the fact that it isn't!" He could hear Adalwolf pacing angrily around the room.

"You are being unreasonable." Lehrer. Surprisingly no persuasion, Adalwolf's mind didn't shift to accommodate an order, no grain of doubt about his own behaviour beginning to sprout inside his head.

"Oh, fuck you! 'I am being unreasonable' shut your godamn mouth. You fucked up! This is your fault and I'm surprised you don't acknowledge that."

"It was not my fault. You know this too."

"No, actually. No, I don't know. You told me to jump of the fucking cliff, I died!"

"In your letter you yourself told me that you weren't sure if you were going to do this because of your poor mental health or because I ordered you to."

"That's the whole schtick of your power, Calix. Confusing someone until they're no longer sure if they want to do something or if you want them to do something!"

"I am sorry you feel that way," Lehrer said in a placating tone, "But I made it right, you are here, you are back. I missed you." Dara raised his eyebrows at the sincere tone.

"I missed you too," Adalwolf admitted. "Or at least a version of you. I had hoped that my dying wish would wake you up but it doesn't seem to have worked very well."

Lehrer sighed. "Wolf-"

"No! No! Don't you dare. I am going to say my piece and you are, for once in your life, going to listen, understood? No magic orders making me drop it or agree with you because I swear I will walk out and never return." Lehrer stayed silent. "You are not well. You are not someone who should have power. Not in the state of mind that you are. I know that you think you are just perfect and everything else is wrong but I used to this that too and I wasn't okay. I know that it's my fault you are like this and I'm sorry. So fucking sorry and I'm asking you to get the help you need. Raphael was right and I didn't listen. You aren't okay and I'm not okay and I shouldn't have involved you into matters like war when you were still a tortured child."

"I involved myself-"

"I allowed you to."

"I could have made you involve me and we would have lost if I hadn't been there to help!" Lehrer raised his voice.

"You don't fucking know that and maybe losing would have been the better option."

"I would be dead."

"And you wouldn't be this!" Adalwolf was panting after that declaration and Dara could feel the pain at having to say it and the regret that came with being unable to take something back because you didn't mean to say it but it was true all the same.

"I wouldn't be what? King? Powerful? Revered?" Lehrer's tone was quiet but the warning was clear as day. _Take the chance to stop this conversation and we will forget this ever happened._

But Adalwolf didn't care and Dara felt I grain of respect and pity at his stubbornness. "I don't know what the hell you've been up to but Raphael hates you, your son is scared of you. For fucks sake Calix he has a collar around his neck!"

"He has a habit of running away."

"He's an adult and also covered in bruises I don't blame him from wanting to leave." Lehrer stayed silent. "Oh, is that the problem. You don't want him to leave. I'm guessing that doesn't have anything to do with some kind of empty nest syndrome and more with your control issues. Just because you can make the world bend doesn't mean it's right. Just because you can make everyone a pawn into your game without any consequences doesn't mean you should. He doesn't want to play your games and he doesn't have to, why is it still so important to you that you _collar_ him? Does the fact that you can't control someone bother you that much? Is it irritating to be knocked off your all mighty horse?" 

"Enough!" Lehrer said it with enough force to knock over a table. Both brothers were breathing heavily and Dara didn't dare move. "I tire of this conversation-"

"You tire of being called out on your shit."

"We will continue this tomorrow. Goodnight," Lehrer spoke over him. Dara scrambled away, fleeing into his own room, hoping that Lehrer had been too preoccupied to notice his presence by the door. He quickly reached for one of the bracelets Noam had given him and pretended he had been immersed in tracing the delicate pattern. _Don't catch me._

He carefully listened for any sound coming from the hall but none came so he turned around slowly. Lehrer was watching him attentively. "Hi," Dara said, he tried not to sound too small but wasn't sure how much he succeeded. 

"Hello," Lehrer said evenly. A thin thread of amusement thrumming through his voice. He slowly came closer, the look in his eyes intent. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," Dara said, trying very hard to not do an impression of a scared deer.

"Hm." Lehrer's eyes slid down to the bracelet he was holding. "It's a shame. If you hadn't told Noam I might have let him visit. Now you will just have to settle for the fact that he remembers you I suppose." He held out his hand and Dara regretfully passed it to him. "I am impressed by how tight you have wrapped him around your little finger but you do tend to have that effect on people, your very nature is seductive after all. I would be proud if it wasn't so bothersome."

"Sorry," Dara whispered.

"Are you?" Lehrer's eyes lit up with a dreadful light and he crushed the bracelet as if it was made of tin foil. He threw it behind him and grabbed Dara's face, pulling him close. "Why don't you show me, flower?" he cooed. He slid a hand into Dara's hair to jerk his head up so he could start dragging his lips over his neck, his other hand sliding over Dara's back. Dara didn't protest, merely closed his eyes, quickly opening them because that only made the wave of revulsion stronger. When he opened them he saw Adalwolf's slack face. Dara froze and watched as the shock slowly build into rage and before he knew it the man had already rushed forward, grabbing a vase of a table and arching it through the air to smash it on Lehrer's head. Lehrer turned at the last moment to grab Adalwolf's wrist in a grasp so tight Dara was certain it was broken.

"What the fuck? What the fuck? What the actual fuck!" Adalwolf tried to free himself and aimed a kick to Lehrer's knee, who dodged easily. "WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?"

Lehrer sighed again. "Adalwolf-"

"Are you out of your godamn mind?"

"I really think you should rest."

"Why? So you can molest your kid in peace?" Adalwolf laughed incredulously.

"You don't understand-"

"I think I do. It's not very difficult to figure out." Adalwolf roughly pushed away from him. "What happened? There must be something that happened to make you like this. Why are you doing this? They did it to you, did you like it so much you decided to pass on the favour?"

"Adalwolf." Lehrer's tone was deathly.

"I am done with your bullshit. Who are you? What the fuck happened?" The pain was thick in his voice. When Lehrer didn't answer Adalwolf shook his head and roughly brushed the back of his hand over his face. He reached for Dara, ignoring his flinching, and started pushing him in the direction of the door.

"Where do you think you are going?" Lehrer asked. Dara cringed at the complete lack of emotions in his voice.

"Away from you," Adalwolf spat back.

"Do not turn your back on me," Lehrer commanded.

"I will do whatever I want." Adalwolf kept pushing Dara into the direction of the doorway."

"Stop moving." Adalwolf froze, Dara could feel the anger and disbelief. The gut wrenching grief overlapping all other emotions. "Do not leave the apartment, do not take Dara away and calm down." The flickering rage simmered down but the grief remained As Lehrer dropped the compulsion that kept Adalwolf rigid. "I am sorry."

"We can fix this. There has to be something. You will be alright."

"There's nothing wrong with me."

"There is. There is. There is. " Adalwolf covered his face and started to cry.

Lehrer laid a careful hand on his shoulder. "You are tired. Why don't you go to bed?"

Adalwolf nodded and left the room. When he was gone Lehrer turned back to Dara, he made a beckoning gesture and Dara slowly drifted closer until Lehrer could grab him by his upper arms. "What a mess. You must be feeling self satisfied that someone agrees with you." Dara shook his head. "No? Then how are you feeling?"

"Afraid," Dara said quietly.

Lehrer studied his face for a moment and then threw his head back and laughed. "Why, flower? There's no need for that at all." He laughed again when Dara flinched after Lehrer reached up his hand to brush a lock of hair out of his face. "You didn't do anything wrong this time," Lehrer murmured.

"No he didn't," Adalwolf said as he dragged in one of the couches in from the main room.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to bed."

"Here?" The incredulity on Lehrer's face almost made Dara smile.

"Yes," Adalwolf hissed. "You don't mind, Dara?" He grinned when Dara shook his head. "Fantastic. Goodnight." He looked expectantly at Lehrer who shook his head but left anyway. When he was gone he turned back to Dara. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault." Dara didn't know that for sure but it sounded right. Lehrer was responsible for his own actions.

Adalwolf rubbed his hands over his face. "I made him like this." 

Dara raised his eyebrows. "A pedophile?"

"I messed him up," came from behind the hands. "It's my fault."

"He's an adult. He chose to hurt me. It's his fault." _Not mine._

"How long?" He was dreading the answer.

"Since I was fourteen," Dara whispered. Adalwolf made a pained noise.

"No one stopped him."

"They didn't know or didn't believe me. No one could have anyway. Raphael tried but Lehrer ordered him not to."

"Why?" Adalwolf asked. _Why become this?_

"I don't know. He said it was because of me."

Adalwolf shot up from the couch, angrily pointing a finger at Dara. "No! It's not your fault, okay? He was the fucking adult. He was your fa-" He cut himself off with a choked sound.

Dara nodded slowly. "Let's go to bed." Adalwolf fell back on the couch as Dara climbed into his bed, hesitating before quickly grabbing a pillow and a couple of sheets to throw in Adalwolf's direction. "Here."

"Thanks."

But he didn't go to sleep and neither did Dara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this on accident and deleted it in a panic and all my old notes died so I might have forgotten stuff.  
> I can't fucking remember Leo's age. I'm going to make him 23 or something.  
> (also didn't know if I made this clear but Leo and Dara met when Dara was 18. I know the rules in America are pretty stern on that kinda thing so I wanted to make that clear. Met after Dara turned 18. And both were sober when it happened)  
> Also Noam's low key jealousy in teh is the funniest thing to me. He's like: I do not like this man because he can be a traitor and this has nothing to do that he is closer to Dara than I am at this point.  
> But they bonded about trauma now bc they have a lot in common in this. (were mortal and saw Dara naked. thats it. thats the whole thing. No I’m kidding)
> 
> Both Noam and Leo refer to themselves dying because their old mortal selves died or almost died but they definitely changed so much that it feels like they're different people.
> 
> Also I think the concept of having a vague idea you were forced to forget something under persuasion. Like not remembering what you forgot but remembering the feeling it gave you.
> 
> Also decided that spirits of high ranking people or people the gods liked that don't deserve Elysium can serve in the palace so they can obtain some form of humanity and don't get wiped away. Like lovers that died too soon, exes they are still fond of, parents of children, children themselves etc. This is based on a couple of dead kings that are judges in the afterlife.
> 
> I don't think I ever told you that in the original draft Dara lied about the extent of his powers in chapter 3(Or 4?) and told Noam he was actually very weak by god standards but I decided that would be too big of a lie to come back from cleanly so instead Dara told the truth (Kinda)
> 
> Also Lehrer definitely blamed Dara for everything that he did and one of the ways he did was by blaming the fact that haoma further sexual arousal. So it was of course Dara's fault.
> 
> Adalwolf is upset in this but he like died for a long time and found out his bro is a pedophile leave him alone.
> 
> Ahura Mazda has 101 names, Harvasp-âgâh is one of them it means omnicient.  
> Angra Mainyu is the adversary of Ahura Mazda
> 
> Hetaera was an elite male prostitute. You had 3 different kinds of prostitutes in Greece. Lowest was pornai who worked in brothels, middle was independent prostitutes who worked directly from the streets, highest was a hetaira (female) or hetaerae (male) who was a highly educated prostitute who would serve a limited amount of men. Often likely also a companion instead of only seen for sex. Male prostitution was very common in Greece apparently. A prostitute was also the only job that permitted a woman to handle her own money.
> 
> Anisedora means gift giver and is one of Gaia's ephitets.
> 
> Suicide was not viewed as a sin in ancient Greece. They used to believe in the four humours, where the amount of a certain fluid (Blood, black bile, yellow bile and phlegm) influenced your character and they also caused things like mania and melancholy (probably depression) and if you committed suicide bc of that it was not a sin and there was no evidence of going to the fields of punishment bc of that. Suicide to avoid capture, rape or bc of money troubles were also seen as tragedies but understood especially in case of the first two.
> 
> I feel like I'm forgetting something. Hm.


	12. It is not so dreadful here.”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Do not fucking touch him."
> 
> It has been 80 years I know and I apologise. Hope you guys are still interested. We're almost done!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The government is conspiring to kill me and I can prove it.
> 
> Warnings  
> Violence  
> Lehrer  
> Mental illness  
> Trauma  
> Wounds (but they aren't big)
> 
> I'm tired and I want this out so badly so I'll just edit this later. (she said, you know, like a liar.)

After that Adalwolf seemed determined to watch Dara at all times. Sitting next to him at dinner, leaning against the wall outside the bathing room and curling up on the couch when it was time to sleep. He stayed silent at first, glaring at the floor, sometimes he seemed to forget where he was. He never asked Dara about what Lehrer had done and Dara never asked about tartarus. Raphael tried to ask him but Adalwolf had just gotten angry. Saying he barely remembered anything anyway and that it wasn't like anything had happened he just sat in the ground for a little while.

Dara knew those things weren't the entire truth. Adalwolf didn't know what he remembered because there was barely any change, he had no idea how much was a hallucination and how much was real. Even with telepathy Dara couldn't tell the difference between the two, every time the memories drifted up from the dark Adalwolf pushed them away viciously, refusing to acknowledge even a second of fear. Dara didn't judge him. He was the same after all.

They seemed like a good fit. Adalwolf was moody but quiet, and he had no reason to get angry at Dara so they got along fine.

Lehrer seemed to have picked up on that as well.

Adalwolf had absolutely no idea what to do about him, he still hadn't figured out how to merge Calix and Lehrer into his head. Every memory of his little brother was drenched in love, Dara was aware that trauma and nostalgia had left their marks on the memories but even when taking those into account it had been clear that Adalwolf adored Calix. He didn't hold any resentment aimed at Calix over the fact that his parents hadn't gifted him much attention after Calix's powers started to manifest, had been overjoyed when they he was alive and had in his fervour to win and keep Calix together completely overlooked the fact that Calix was steadily losing it.

Memories were fickle and subjective. They were always coloured by worldview, assumptions, hindsight and emotions. In this case a whole goddamn load of love, violence and mental instability. Even with the emotion and the vicious need to beat the enemy that had often overtaken the urge to see Calix healthy Dara could see the little loose screws, they had started to manifest as soon as Lehrer had been thrown up by Kronos. How sanity sank further and further away with each well executed plan of mass destruction. Dara understood now why Adalwolf blamed himself, he didn't know if it was deserved. Lehrer always seemed to have a power hungry streak in him but he knew Adalwolf hadn't helped.

Still, Lehrer was an adult. He made his own decisions and he had made the decision to not change.

The more time Adalwolf spent with Dara the more impatient Lehrer got. This was far from the fairy tale reunions he must have had in mind and Dara was certain he was going to be blamed for ruining it.

At this point he wasn't sure which Lehrer was more unstable. He had known for a long time that Lehrer was insane but Adalwolf's mind seemed to deteriorate with the seconds ticking away on the clock. He would avoid sleeping, telling himself that he did it to make sure his brother didn't sneak in behind his back and not because of the nightmares Dara could hear him whimper sometimes. He didn't try to wake Adalwolf up after he nearly melted the skin of his arm the first time. Raphael had fixed it and Adalwolf had whispered a broken 'sorry' with a dead look in his eyes.

Worse was the constant stream of negativity coming out of Adalwolf's mind. About Lehrer about himself and about the state of things. Wondering how people were dumb enough to not see what Lehrer was before. Wondering how he was stupid enough to not see it until it was staring him in the face. Dara had told him that it wasn't his fault and he had laughed bitterly. "I should have seen that he had changed."

"People don't expect a pedophile and you have your own stuff to work through, it's fine," Dara said.

"No it's not," Adalwolf sighed, staring at the ceiling. Dara had rolled over on his side to rest his head on a palm.

"You stopped him. And you would have believed me if I told you."

Adalwolf snorted. "Yeah? How'd you figure?"

"I can read your mind."

Adalwolf was silent for a long moment. "Can you read his?"

"Adalwolf-"

"Just say Wolf."

"That's the dogs name."

"Well I was here before the dog so he can just get a new one," Wolf bit out. "Can you read his mind or not?"

"No," Dara said tiredly.

"You're lying," Wolf snapped back.

"Why would I lie?" Dara asked, incredibly offended.

"Because we worked with some other guy years ago with telepathy and he got through to Calix just fine." Wolf paused for a second. "Calix probably killed him, he never liked him."

" _ Calix _ learned telepathy too. Maybe from him, I don't know, never asked," Dara shrugged.

"So you can't read his mind and he can't read yours?"

"Yep."

"Persuasion doesn't work on you either then." Wolf sighed when Dara nodded in response. "That's probably where all this comes from. Him and his fucking control obsession." He kicked the table next to Dara's bed hard. "Fuck!"

"Please don't punish my poor table for your brother's mistakes."

"It's like he's an entirely different person." He fell silent after that.

_ A different person _ . The thought had taken root in his mind with alarming speed. It kept drifting around, sharpening every time Lehrer did something that Calix could never have done until even the smallest of things became an offence.  _ Calix didn't drink that, Calix wouldn't say that, Calix had been a cat person. _ The constant strain of Wolf's mind was starting to wear on Dara, he would unravel eventually. The other thing putting Dara on edge was Lehrer's slow building rage.

Not that he would label it as rage, Calix Lehrer would never admit that he was jealous of Dara but it was there anyway, slowly turning on its axis and solidifying into something violent. It rose up with every furious look from Adalwolf, every time his brother asked Dara if he was doing okay, every time he teased Dara for 'not having hobbies outside of reading, you fucking nerd.' Lehrer's face remained carefully neutral every time it happened yet Dara could almost taste his displeasure in the air.

The fact that Lehrer couldn't take it out on anyone made everything worse, Adalwolf was with Dara, Raphael was an option, a very alluring option once it was clear that Raphael was also on the receiving end of Wolf's affections, but Lehrer seemingly didn't want to risk his brother seeing him for the monster he truly was. Which left either Wolf or Noam but Noam was far away and Lehrer seemed to have formed some attachment to Wolf in the years he had him so his anger could only build.

Dara was reading through another book, tracing his finger over Noam's handwriting, when it happened. Adalwolf was sat on the couch next to Raphael, allowing him to gently stroke figures into one forearm with his fingertips while carding the other hand through the silver at Raphaels temple, the wonder he felt at the simple pleasure of touch almost painful. He let the lock of hair he was playing with glide through his fingers until he could fiddle with the end of it. "How long has Calix been like this?"

Raphaels fingers stilled and he cast a wary look upward. "I think it has always been there."

Adalwolf's mouth twisted minutely downwards in the same way Lehrer's did when he got an answer he didn't want. "Yes, but was there ever a tipping point?"

Raphael frowned. "Tipping point?" he asked slowly.

Adalwolf shrugged. "A moment where he seemed... changed."

Raphael's fingers slowly started to move again, rubbing in slow circles over Adalwolf's inner arm. "It must have happened gradually. I don't believe he woke up one day and decided to be what he is now. First time I noticed is when he ordered me to burn the dryads to starve Kronos of supplies." Adalowlf nodded encouragingly. "Even after he became king he still wasn't this far gone. He did horrible things but at least it had a purpose. Later it was because he wanted to." He didn't look at Dara but they all knew what he was referencing.

Adalwolf narrowed his eyes. "Why didn't you stop him?"

Raphael hung his head. "I tried but he was always two steps ahead. The punishment after I tried to take Dara away the first time was bad enough to dissuade me."

Wolf lifted his chin in a challenging gesture, a more obvious version of what Dara saw Lehrer do sometimes, a dare. "Scared of being hit?"

"He didn't hurt  _ me _ ."

Adalwolf was quiet after that. "Did you know?"

"No," Raphael said quickly. "I thought it was just physical, I would have stopped it if I knew he was-" Dara slammed his book closed, startling both of them, he felt a pinprick of guilt at the brief fear on Adalwolf's face.

"We should have lunch." Dara smiled serenely. Raphael gave him a brief apologetic smile and got up, gently pulling Adalwolf with him. Adalwolf let himself be pulled along easily, seemingly already lost in thought. Dara's steps faltered when he stepped out into the hallway and saw Lehrer in his favourite seat. His flat eyes caught onto Dara and Dara quickly averted his gaze. He could feel the weight of Lehrer's eyes upon him as he walked past him to get to the kitchen.

"Has he been eating well?" The smooth voice never failed to make Dara's hair stand on end but he didn't turn around from where he was gathering cups.

"He has been fine," Raphael answered curtly. "No need to worry."  _ Or explode. _

"That's good to hear. How have you been doing?" The softening of his tone and the sudden surge of hostility in Adalwolf's head signaling that he had shifted his focus to him.

"Fine. Not that you care," he bit out.

Lehrer made a low disappointed noise. "Of course I do." 

Dara's hand tightened on the goblet. 

_ ("You don't care about me!" _

_ "Of course I do, flower." _

_ "No you don't!" He stomped his foot down on the ground. _

_ A disappointed sigh. "Flower, I wanted to discuss this like adults but you are clearly too upset for even that." _

_ "You hurt me!" _

_ "You make me hurt you. I'm doing this to teach you something, Dara, but clearly," his father's eyes narrowed as a terrible light lit them up, "I haven't taught it well enough.") _

Dara fervently shook his head. None of that now. 

"Are you doing alright, flower?"

"I'm fine," Dara said sharply. Judging from the tense beat of silence following that statement it might have been too sharp.

"It can't have been easy for you," Lehrer murmured. "Noam, tartarus and now being shadowed everyday."

"I said I'm fine."

"No need to be rude, Dara," Lehrer said cooly. Dara stared resolutely at the cup in front of him. "Now, let's have lunch." What followed might have been the most awkward lunch Dara had ever had and he had been forced to eat next to people who had graphic fantasies about him while sitting next to  _ Lehrer _ .

Adalwolf kept shooting suspicious glances at his cup, Raphael looked like he would rather die than be here a second longer and Dara shoved his ambrosia around his bowl with curt movements. Lehrer watched them all silently, his emotions locked away behind his face.

Lehrer took them all in with a smile that was ever so strained. "I don't think we've eaten together since we fought Kronos. There's more food this time around at least." Raphael gave him a pained smile for the sake of politeness but Adalwolf just gave him a flat stare. "Truly, the provisions you two had on Crete were astonishingly bad."

"We weren't on Crete," Adalwolf interrupted.

Lehrer's gaze flitted to him and Raphael gave him a confused look. "We were."

"Not when we rescued Calix, we had relocated to Keros by then."

Raphael regarded him carefully. "We never went to Keros, Wolf."

"He's right," Lehrer added.

The temperature in the room skyrocketed as Adalwolf turned on Raphael. "You're working with him." His voice was deathly quiet.

"What? No-"

"It's so obvious now."

"Adalwolf-"

"Are you even under persuasion?" Adalwolf whispered.

"I don't know what you're talking about, we never went to Keros. We stayed on Crete and in the final months of the war we moved to Skiathos. Remember?"

"I don't because that did not happen." Adalwolf got more and more agitated by the minute and the confusion on Raphael's face was starting to twist into concern, Lehrer watched all of them thoughtfully over the rim of his goblet, Dara didn't say anything. Both Raphael and Adalwolf believed themselves utterly. The silence could be cut with a knife.

"Are you not going to eat?" Lehrer asked carefully neutral. Dara stabbed the liquid a little harder with his spoon. "Is it not to your liking?" Lehrer continued, a sarcastic tone creeping in under the saccharine sweetness.

Anger started to brew in Dara's throat. "I'm just not hungry."

"I don't think I believe you," Lehrer said calmly but there was a warning in his eyes.

"I don't care!" Dara snapped. He had a split second to feel regret before he was backhanded across the face hard enough to throw him from his seat.

"We have talked about respect many times already," Lehrer noted mildly, "But it appears that the lesson hasn't stuck." he stood abruptly, shoving his chair back hard enough that it fell, eyes glinting maliciously. 

Dara heard Wolf suck in a shaky breath before heat washed over him with enough force it felt like he was being slapped again. Adalwolf looked furious, his eyes had lit up like the sun at midday, fingers curling inwards, every line of his body was drawn with violence.

He had never looked more like Lehrer.

"Do not fucking touch him," he hissed.

A brief flicker of surprise flickered over Lehrer's face. "Adalwolf, stand down."

"No, I don't think I will,  _ brother _ ." The word was spat like an insult. "You need someone to beat you around the head until you realise that people don't understand you not because you're logical but just so insane that nobody can follow your bullshit."

"Adal-"

"Listen to me!" Adalwolf slammed his hand down hard enough the table broke in two. "I know that you aren't my brother because he's dead."

"I..." Lehrer's eyes were wide and for the first time he didn't look untouchable.

"Calix never got out of Kronos, right? You were some replacement they placed in our midst. Admit it!"

Lehrer held both his hands carefully in front of him as if approaching a wild animal. "You are not well. You've been hurt and you are confused. You know these things aren't true."

"I know that they are true down to my bones and you know what? Even if you were Calix and not some sick replacement you still wouldn't be my brother. That would be worse because it means that you killed me, it means that you raped your own son and still think that you are some kind of hero!" Adalwolf laughed and Dara had never heard anything as mad. "I will never forgive you, that is a promise and you'll have to live with that knowledge for however many more cursed years we have to endure your presence on this plane of existence." He bared his teeth in aggression. "If it were up to me that's not going very long."

Lehrer looked- Lehrer looked stricken. Hurt. For a single hysterical second Dara thought he might see Lehrer cry but then his face smoothed over, like the sea polishing the surface of a stone. "I didn't want to do this, but you leave me no choice."

"Oh, of course. It's never your fault," Adalwolf said right before launching himself forward.

"Don't move."

Adalwolf froze, hand inches away from Lehrer's neck, close enough to melt his fibula and the rage on his face convinced Dara that he was going to break through persuasion through sheer force of will.

He didn't. No one ever did.

"Calix-"

"No, you be still." Raphael shut his mouth again, he kept his tired eyes on Lehrer as he slowly inched towards the place where Dara was still lying. Lehrer didn't pay him any attention, all of his terrible focus still on Adalwolf. He shifted leisurely towards his brother so his scalding hot touch caressed the skin of his neck. The skin blistered and broke before healing over in some version of a dance.. "I have been patient with you," Lehrer began softly. "I have worked hours on undoing your mistakes, on building something worthy out of the messy handful of strongholds you had and I have succeeded. I am king. I am all-powerful and no one can escape me. Not even you. Not anymore." He tenderly brushed a tear of Adalwolf's cheek. "I can see now that you are ill. Did Dara talk these ideas into your head?" Lehrer's gaze drifted towards him and Dara could feel Raphael tense. "No, he is that vindictive but not that smart or brave. Go to your room and sleep. I promise, brother, that I will make everything better in the morning." Lehrer smiled as he watched Adalwolf turn away.

"You cannot."

"Excuse me?"

"I know what you're thinking and it won't work. He's frail and the consequences of influencing his mind in the massive ways that you are planning on will be disastrous."

"There's a big word," Lehrer murmured. "But I think that we've established that I will do as I please."

"Listen to me."

"Dara, flower, go to your room." Dara threw a look at Raphael who nodded at him and then he pushed himself up to walk to his rooms, he threw a glance over his shoulder to see Raphael squaring his shoulders and Lehrer- he looked at him with the burning hatred that was so putrid it must have always been there. He slammed the door, cold sweat soaking his chiton. He rubbed his hands over his face and tried to breath. He crawled into bed and spent what felt like ages listening to the voices sliding through the walls but he knew what would happen. Lehrer always got what he wanted. Eventually things quieted down and he was alone again. He tried to see it as the mercy it was. Dara sighed and buried his face in his pillow. 

A sound in the hall made his heart beat faster. Maybe Lehrer didn't care anymore about seeming like a decent person. A thought that was discarded a second later as he recognised Wolf's ever tumultuous mind.  _ Out, out, out _ , was being scratched into the walls. The door was opened slowly, then closed mostly as footfalls made their way to him. 

"Dara," Adalwolf hissed, "wake the fuck up. You need to leave."

Dara sat up in bed to face the oldest Lehrer brother. "What are you  _ doing _ ?"

"Did you drop your brain somewhere? I'm helping you." Adalwolf pulled an exasperated face as he said it, like his actions should be self explanatory.

"Did you? Honestly, what are you thinking?"

"Shouldn't you know that?" Adalwolf asked with a crooked grin. "It's not safe for you here and I'm getting you out. My moral compass badgered to hell but I know that this is the right thing and I'm going to do it. Now, come on. Don't be scared, I'll keep you safe. I know no one has been keeping you safe but I'm going to die trying."

Dara could feel his heart pounding in his throat. "Where?"

Wolf looked impatiently over his shoulder. "Your boyfriend. Noam. He's been crowned, he'll keep you safe in the underworld."

"Lehrer can-"

"Lehrer will know where you've gone and he will try to get you back. Yes. But! But you have a chance to win there. The underworld is a weird place, it's made out of these separate planes, like layers and they overlap and cross each other but are still different and even the king of the underworld does not rule all of them and also can't do whatever he wants.My point is it's a place that my 'brother' can't simply storm into to make demands, not if he can't use his power. The three gods who have power over the underworld right now are Gaia, Tartarus and Noam. All of them on your side."

"Noam is under persuasion."

"Noam has been figuring some shit out while moping about not being able to stare longingly in your eyes anymore," Wolf remarked snidely. "He knows and wants to get you back. He's figured out whatever Sacha had."

"He will fight for me," Dara said breathily, dizzy with the realisation. "How do you know this?" Images doomed up in Adalwolf's mind. A crooning voice, A large eye, cold but gentle hands made of stone.  _ Anesidora _ . "You two talk?"

Adawolf shrugged. "I think she might have recruited Morpheus in conveying messages. Can we leave now?"

Dara wanted nothing more but fear had shackled him to his bed. "If he finds out..."

"We'll have to pay hell and then some. If he doesn't find out there's at least a chance. Your other option is sitting here and waiting until you get another chance with a knife while he moves on to your boyfriend." Adalwolf’s eyes were burning into him. "Go, please," he begged.

Dara looked at him for a hard second and then stood up. "How are we getting out?"

The corners of Wolf's mouth pulled up in a tired grin and he gestured for Dara to follow him. They crept into the hallway towards the main room, the dog lying on the carpet perked his head up, tail slowly wagging. Dara put a finger to his lips while Adalwolf gave him a warning look. The doors were held closed by a weaved net of magic, Dara could try to break through, he knew how, but Lehrer would know as soon as he pulled on the first string.

Adalwolf didn't seem concerned about that, he closed his eyes, put his hands to the doors and began to work. Dara turned back to the hallway -half convinced that he would witness a furious Lehrer storming in to stop them- but it stayed empty.

He kept looking, not moving a single muscle as Wolf concentrated on the doors. It won't work, Dara thought suddenly, it's not going to work and I'm going to be stuck here forever. 

The lock clicked softly as the door swung open soundlessly.

"Go," Adalwolf whispered. "Gaia is waiting for you, she will bring you to Noam."

Dara hesitated. "Come with me."

Adalwolf gave him a grim smile. "He said I couldn't leave or take you away. The loophole is that I'm not taking you anywhere. I can't get around 'do not leave' I'm afraid."

"He will punish you."

"I don't think I'll remember it," Adalwolf said calmly. "Just try to win. And please remember me as I am now." He gestured a little more forcefully to the door. "Now go."

Dara stared one more time into those bottomless eyes before turning around and walking through the door. Fear took a hold of him, if he was caught-

_ Then don't get caught. _

He blew a curl out of his face before taking off. It should be easy. Olympus wasn't built to keep people in and no one had been alerted to his escape. The only issue were the stairs, they were the easiest route to climb down the mountain but they were in full sight of the palace. One look and he would be seen so they weren't an option, however someone climbing down without using the stairs would be suspicious. He would have to risk it.

He darted through the street, walking at a fast pace but sticking to the shadows. He couldn't act like he had something to hide but everybody would recognise him immediately if he was seen. When he got to the edge of the gardens laying on the outside of Olympus he climbed over the fence and put one foot down onto the bare rock. Power thrummed through him in a never-ending harmony. _ Little one, let go. _

He did.

He fell and the rock contorted around him, speeding him down the slope. He chafed open his leg and side but barely noticed over the adrenaline of freedom. When he finally got to the bottom of the mountain he kept falling. He tried to call out but Gaia spoke in his head.  _ No, not yet. Patience. _

He kept sinking through the darkness until she dropped him on the sand. He pried his eyes open and took a deep breath. The cold air of the underworld filled his lungs. He couldn't see Gaia but he felt the sand under him shift comfortingly against his legs. 

"It's good to see you," he whispered. He couldn't hear her but a low tremor went through the ground. Almost like a purr. Dara smiled and turned his head towards the castle. Towards Noam. "Thank you for this."

_ This is not a gift, pebble. It is a trade. _

"I know but I am still grateful." He dusted himself off and started to climb up towards the castle, his heart beating in his throat. He forced the gates open with telekinesis and ran into the courtyard. Nobody was there. Where was Noam? The throne room- No, it was late he must be in his rooms. Had he left? Why couldn't Dara feel him?

"Who are you?" an unfriendly voice asked from behind him. 

Dara turned to see the washed out figure of a spirit frowning at him "I- The king is expecting me. Bring me to him."

The boy turned his nose up at him. "That doesn't answer my question."

Dara clenched his jaw tightly. "No it doesn't," he answered, sugary sweet. "I don't have to answer anything because I vastly outrank you and if you do not warn the king right now he will be very, very cross with you. Bring him to me."

The boy's expression had turned unsure. "It's late. He's probably sleeping."

"He won't care that you woke him up, I promise." When the boy still refused to move Dara sighed irritated . "Fine, he's in his rooms then? I'll go to him myself." He pulled open the door of the throne room and went right. He could hear the boy scuffle behind him. 

"My Lord! You can't-"

"If you try to stop me I will feed you to Styx," Dara hissed over his shoulder. That shut him up but he still anxiously trailed after Dara as he stormed through the palace. The ferocious need that ate Dara up from the inside surprised him, Noam wasn't an option, somewhere along the line he had become a necessity. Dara couldn't live without him anymore.

"At least let me-" The boy tried to say something further but Dara had already wrenched open the doors to Noam's rooms.

"I told you to leave," Noam bit out.

"Noam." At the sound of his voice Noam jerked around, looking at him like he had risen from the dead.

"Dara," Noam breathed out. Dara could feel tears welling in his eyes as he shot forward to throw himself into Noam's arms and bury his face into his neck. Noam tightened his arms around him until he could barely breathe. Letting go with one arm to tilt his head up so he could look at his face in wonder. Then he kissed him and Dara kissed back, trying to press all the love and desperation he felt into Noam's mouth. Noam's hands roamed over his back and into his hair. He ripped at the silver fibula that was keeping Noam's chiton closed as Noam's fingers started to explore under the hem of his chiton. He hissed softly when Noam's fingers skirted over his wounds and Noam pulled back immediately. "You're hurt."

"Not badly," Dara murmured as he tried to catch Noam's lips again. 

"You," Noam snapped at the boy. "Bring me ambrosia. Quick!" The boy bowed and scrambled to make himself scarce.

Dara distracted him again by pressing kisses to his cheekbone. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you too. So, so much." Noam slid his hand upwards towards Dara's neck and paused at the collar. "What did he do?"

Dara leaned back a little. "It's nothing."

"It's a collar," Noam hissed, rubbing his thumb over the band.

Dara stroked a hand over his cheek. "I'm okay. I promise."

He could feel Noam starting to tremble in rage. "I'm sorry, Dara. I'm so sorry. I'm an idiot." He squeezed his eyes shut but the tears still rolled over his cheeks

Dara pulled him closer. "It's okay. I'm okay. I forgive you," Dara murmured in his ear. "It wasn't your fault. You didn't know."

"I should have."

Dara bit his lip. "Lehrer is at fault here," he said eventually. "And we need to stop him."

"How?" Noam asked softly, nosing through Dara's curls, pulling back every few seconds to look at Dara, as if to make sure it was really him before he went back to breathing him in deep.

"That's what we need to figure out," he said while stroking slow circles over Noam's shoulders. "Why can't I read your mind?"

"I figured out the magic behind Sacha's crown. It stopped Lehrer's influence. Wait, one second." Suddenly whatever had been hiding Noam's mind fell away and Dara was greeted with a barrage of love, sorrow, regret, anger. He felt himself relax. Noam made a worried sound as his hands gently came up to frame his face, thumbs wiping beneath his eyes. Tears, I'm crying. "Please don't be upset, baby," Noam murmured.

"No, I'm happy. I promise." Dara smiled wider and Noam gently pressed his forehead against his. He took Dara's hand and led him towards the bed, coaxing Dara to first straddle him and then bend down so he could cradle his face again. His hand swept down to the collar again and he furrowed his brow in concentration. Dara could feel the metal start to heat up.

"This might hurt a little," Noam said softly.

"It's okay." Dara tried to smile again as the heat rose to a temperature that was first uncomfortable and then painful. He bit his lip to not let any sound out but inhaled sharply as Noam finally burned through the gold and briefly touched his neck.

He pulled off the collar as quickly as possible and threw it in a corner of the room with a violence that startled Dara. "Sorry." Dara just shook his head and leaned down to kiss him again.

"It's okay," he said again. "I love you."

Noam's face crumpled like paper. "Still? After everything?"

"Yes, of course. Don't act like there was ever any other option."

"I love you too, baby. So much," Noam whispered wetly. Dara just kissed him again.

Someone coughed awkwardly from the doorway. "I- I have the ambrosia."

"Bring it here," Noam said immediately. The boy scuffled forward to present the bowl, Noam took it without looking, attention focused solely on Dara. "Thank you, Basil. Please, don't tell anyone about this."

Basil's mind shifted almost imperceptibly. The boy bowed and nodded hastily before running from the room. Dara's mouth fell open in shock.

"Eat, sweetheart. You'll feel better." Noam's eyes were full of affection as he offered the bowl to Dara. Did he not know?

"What did you just do?" Dara croaked out. Trepidation flitted through Noam's mid. "You have persuasion."

"Yes, I do. I believe Lehrer may have given me more of his powers than he intended." It's how I won against Sacha. Noam gave him a hesitant smile as he held up the bowl again and this time Dara took it. He slotted his fingers around the spoon and took a bite. As he ate he felt the wounds on his side closing. 

"So," Dara asked between bites, "Do you have all of his powers?"

Noam shrugged. "I've no idea. I was able to handle his lightning."

Dara gave him a hard look. "Don't say it like it's a casual thing, not everybody can do that. I couldn't do it." And Lehrer had given him shit for that for weeks. "We can use that when fighting him."

"How are we going to win?"

Dara tipped his head back to stare at the spirals carved into the ceiling. "We need allies. Ames, Taye, possibly Bethany and Leo. It's not much but having two gods of war on our side has got to count for something. Also it has to be here, he doesn't like to admit it but he's weaker here, especially if Gaia is after him. He's arrogant he won't worry about winning and he thinks you're still under persuasion so we will have some advantages."

"How long have we got?"

"Until morning, after that he will know that I left and come for us."

"Won't he wait?"

Dara bit his lip. "No, this looks bad on him and he won't be able to stand the indignity of me escaping, he will have to prove that he is better to me. It will also look bad if he didn't come to get me immediately, right now he can still spin a tale about a torn and hopelessly smitten child that needs to be brought under control because he's a danger to himself, the longer he waits the more that explanation will start to tear at the edges."

"What about Raphael?"

"He's still under persuasion. And Adalwolf, well," Dara trailed off. "I'm not sure if we will see him again, not in a shape that I'll recognise."

Noam rubbed his hands up and down his sides. "I'm sorry."

Dara violently shook his head and stood from Noam's lap. "We need to focus, start preparing. Get messages out, alert Styx and we need some kind of plan."

"Right away." Noam stood and caught Dara's hand to press a kiss to his knuckles. "We will be okay, Dara."

"We better be, I'll never let you live it down if we lose. Now go."

When Noam had left the room Dara took a shaky breath and prepared himself for the end.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't have psychotic depression or ptsd so if I portrayed these things wrong or in any negative way (besides them being like disorders and therefore not fun) please let me know.  
> So Adalwolf basically had a psychotic break which is something that causes people to loose touch with reality. In his case, believing Lehrer isn't Calix. You don't have to have a psychotic disorder to have a psychotic break it can also happen if you have bipolar disorder, anxiety or severe cases of depression. There's not a ton of information about it and also very stigmatised.
> 
> I am not a part of many of the identities shown in the book and I will therefore never truly know how being a part of them feels. The only thing I can do is find as much information as possible and portray these things with respect. However reading experiences of people and academic papers on how things are and work isn't the same as living as those identities. If I fuck up please tell me so I can adjust and learn. If I have fucked up then I am sorry and I'll try to do better.
> 
> Also just because you are discussing something 'calmly and rationally' doesn't mean your arguments aren't trash. (Fuck you Lehrer stop sounding like a fedora redditor)
> 
> Also I love writing fluff and I love writing Noam and Dara together and in love and then I separate them for half the damn fic.
> 
> Also I don't know if it's clear but Dara has difficulty reading Adalwolf's mind bc he's in such a bad shape right now he's not making much sense.
> 
> Also here is where I fucked up massively, I accidentally erased everybody's jewish identity. I'm so sorry and am trying to fix it. I've been doing research into jew in ancient Greece and I can't find a ton of information so it's a little slow going, also jewish believes have changed over the centuries and ancient jews believed in an underworld but the ideas differ greatly today and then. I have changed parts of the story to fit this in and will continue to edit it.
> 
> I love greek mythology purely because the greeks pointed at a hill and said "their are big horny people living there." and believed that for thousands of years.
> 
> Crete is the island that Zeus was hidden on as a baby. Skiathos is an island near mount Othrys. Mount Othrys is the mountain the titans lived on.


	13. by Edna st Miller

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He smiled and started to walk towards Dara like he had all the time in the world. He floated onto the river bank, looking down with those dead eyes. “Hello, flower. I will savor this.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Return of the queen.
> 
> (Really hope you're still interested and I made it worth the wait)
> 
> Merry Christmas I finally got this done!
> 
> Warnings:  
> Murder  
> Lehrer  
> dead people and also children  
> fighting  
> wounds  
> graphic sexual content (starts after the proposal ends at 'Dara smiled at him and kissed him again. “Lovely.”')  
> kidnapping (but like flirty consensual kidnapping)  
> swearing

Noam was sure he looked as harried as Dara did. They had been up all night, warning the other Gods, commanding them to prepare for a war but everybody was still recovering from the last one. The erinyes were wounded gravely and most of the Gods here weren't made for fighting and had no desire to do so again.

“First you attack us, weaken and tire us and now you want to make us fight?”

“I know that it’s a dick move but I need your help.”

The goddess tilted her head slowly, shimmering dark braids sliding off her shoulder. “To fight whom?”

Noam sucked in a deep breath. “Lehrer.” 

Her full lips parted slowly in an incredulous grin. “Didn't you just attack us with him?”

“I know how it sounds but I need you to fight again.”

She laughed lowly. “And why would I do that?”

Noam clenched his jaw. “Because I am your king.”

“Not if you lose,” she said coyly.

“If I lose you'll have to answer to Gaia’s rage and by extension Tartarus.”

The smile dripped from her lips at that and she glared at him for a tense second. “What would you have us do?”

Noam sighed in relief. “Anyone who can needs to prepare for battle. I need you to fight to the bitter end. They are suspicious of me but they’ll listen to you so I need you on my side.”

“Yeah, you do. But we aren't enough to win from Olympus. I will not fight a useless battle,” she warned.

“You won’t have to. We are bringing reinforcements”

She cocked one eyebrow. “Your little friends are single handedly going to stop Calix Lehrer?”

“We are going to stop him with the spirits' help.”

She laughed and laughed until Noam was sure she had broken a rib. Did she have ribs? “You are so funny. The spirits can't win. They are feeble and broken.”

“They aren't powerful but there's a lot of them.”

“They are dead.”

“So they have nothing to lose.”

She smiled wryly. “I suppose you're right.”

“You will help me.”

“Of course, your majesty. I will start alerting your troops.” She slowly bent her head forward but didn't avert her gaze. “Now that we’re friends you can call me Claire.” Then she swept out of the room without waiting for his dismissal, leaving Noam standing alone on the elevated platform that housed his throne. Nyx, or Claire he supposed, was a powerful ally and they would need her to survive Lehrer’s onslaught. Noam may be king but Nyx was old, as old Gaia and the beings of the underworld would listen to her and now him, without the part where they stabbed him in the back at the earliest convenience. 

Someone rapped their knuckles against the door. “Enter.”

Leo pushed the door open with an almost lazy gesture. “Heard you needed help.”

“So we’re to back you up!” Bethany struck a silly pose as she said it and Noam’s heart squeezed so tightly it hurt.

“You came.”

“Duh. You think just because you're some big god now you're rid of us. Don't think so,” Ames said. Her arms were folded firmly over her chest but she was smiling anyway. 

“And here I was hoping.”

“Fuck you, Álvaro,” she laughed.

“Is there a plan?” Taye asked.

“Sorta.” Noam squared his shoulders and took a deep breath. “So, the underworld gods are on our side.”

“You sure? They're fickle as fuck.”

“Yes. Styx likes Dara for some reason. And Gaia has threatened the rest into helping us.”

“So? That’s not enough if he’s bringing all of Olympus.”

“I don't think he will.” Dara climbed on the dais. “Many gods are weaker in the underworld and won’t be able to do much except getting in Lehrer’s way. He’s humiliated and enraged so he’s not going to wait and find a way around that. He’ll want my pain and he wants to win in a way that is absolute and crushing so he’ll bring himself and some of the strongest gods he has at his disposal.”

“Why’s he mad? You eloping isn't enough to make him sloppy.”

“He will blame me for whatever he’s going to do to Adalwolf.” Dara wrapped his arms around his waist. “He won't be okay.”

Noam carefully touched his shoulder. “Hey, it’s not your fault.”

Dara shook his head. “He has to pay the price for saving me. He knew what it was. It’s still awful.”

Noam stepped closer. “Lehrer was going to damage him anyway, you know that.”

Dara shrugged. “Probably. But it’s still… unfortunate.” He bit his lip. “Go on,” he said quietly when Noam didn't continue and Noam shivered a little at the speed at which Dara had recovered. At the word choice that had been carved there by someone else and Dara flinched away from him.

“Baby-”

“Just continue,” Dara bit out.

 _I’m sorry._ “I’ll convince the people of Asphodel to fight with us.”

“How?!” Ames burst out.

Noam took a deep breath. “They have a lot to gain.”

“They're completely hollow. They can’t fight.”

“They’re doomed to wander a plain grass field forever; of course they're dull. If I win I will give them what they deserve: a normal life! I will build cities with jobs and hobbies and places to be together and if they live good enough for a long time they will be given the option to go to Elysium.”

“I reiterate, how?”

Noam deflated. “I don't know yet.”

“We’ll figure something out,” Dara said from beside him. Like it was simple, like he didn't light Noam’s entire being on fire with the use of we. One of the corners of Dara’s mouth curled up in a smirk and the knowledge that Dara was very aware of what he was doing and how it affected Noam never failed to be absurdly hot.

“If you stay with me I can do anything,” Noam said sincerely. Maybe too sincere because Dara’s face dropped. “Too much?”

“No, just- just keep going!” Dara’s cheeks turned red and Noam cleared his throat.

“Right. So. I’ll lead the people. Leo I need you to sow confusion in whoever Lehrer brings. It wont work on him but in combinations with the spirits it should be enough to break their ranks. Taye, Ames and Bethany will help you keep them busy. Once they're spread out we need to goad Lehrer over the styx. She’ll make sure he can’t retreat and that the reinforcements can't come near him.”

“That’s my job,” Dara said.

“Yes, you’ll have to piss him off enough that he’ll come to you. Then Nyx and Hecate will attack from the back. We try to kill him, if that’s not possible we drag him to Tartarus.”

“Or we die.”

“Or we die,” Noam agreed.

Leo’s face was grave. “It’s a risky plan.”

“I know.”

Leo shrugged. “I like it.”

Ames grinned. “This should be interesting at least.”

Noam grinned. “Good. I’ve got to go talk to dead people. Y’all ready yourself.”

* * *

They were everywhere, stumbling around hollow and confused. Looking for loved ones, looking for themselves. Both were long gone.

All ages, pale and faded, mumbling to themselves. Noam could only feel pity at the sight of what he had inherited, these broken people that were his now.

He climbed to a hill, spirits moving drowsily out of the way. Once he reached the top he squared his shoulder. “Uhm- hey. Hey! I need to say something!” The spirits stopped their shuffling, slowly turning their eyes to him. “I am the new Hades, I rule this world.” No movement. “Soon Calix Lehrer, king of the gods, will attack us and I need your support to help me stop him. Can I count on you?”

There was no reaction. A woman with rubies dangling from her ears stepped forwards, a little girl with a flower in her curls dangling from her hip. Dara’s flower, Noam realized with a start. “Why would we do this?” she asked, her hands were trembling but her head was tipped up proudly, unafraid.

“You are here because you have not committed crimes or been a hero. You are stuck in an inbetween of nothingness. I believe this is unfair. You lived normal lives, you shouldn't be punished for it. I want to change the underworld. Make it a place where you can live again, with jobs and hobbies and art. This will be a second chance at Elysium. If you're good enough you’ll be allowed to go there, similarly if you commit atrocities you’ll be thrown in Tartarus.”

She frowned. “You won't do this if we don't help?”

“If you don't help I’ll be dead tomorrow morning and I doubt whoever comes in my place will be interested in making improvements.”

“I have your word?”

Noam stepped forward. “I swear it.” The people began to murmur to each other.

She hesitated. “Then, if the children will be kept out of it, you will have my life, or death I suppose.” She bowed quickly.

A bloodied man stepped forward. “What she said.” He bowed too. More and more people voiced their support and bowed until the entire field was deafening with cries of _Long live the king._

The only one who wouldn't fight were the children who were passed from spirit to spirit until they reached Noam. The girl with the flower grabbed Noam’s hand. “Are you a king?”

Noam smiled. “Yes, I am.”

She bounced on her toes. “Do you know a flower prince?”

Noam smiled wider. “I do, he’s here too.”

“Can you remind him that he hasn't shown me his crown yet? He promised.”

“I will, honey. Follow me everybody,” he said to the children behind him and he led them away in a long train of faint bodies. When he reached the castle he ordered the other spirits to set the children up in rooms and keep them safe. 

“What’s your name?” he asked the girl as she was led away.

“Bea!” she said.

“I’m Noam.”

“Bye Noam, you're very pretty.” She waved one last time and then disappeared from sight.

Noam looked at the hall she had disappeared in for a long moment before he turned and ran for his rooms.

Noam threw the door open, making Dara shoot up from where he had been staring at the flames. “They’ll fight.” 

“They will?” Dara breathed out. 

“Yes.” Noam walked over to him and pulled him upright by both his hands so he could kiss him senseless. “We can win. _We can win_.” Dara gasped when Noam sunk his teeth in his bottom lip. “It’s almost over.” He moved downwards to kiss Dara’s neck.

Dara wound his arms around his neck “Noam, Noam, wait.”

“Yes, baby?”

Dara looked so beautiful in the low fire of the hearth with his bright eyes and red cheeks. “What happens afterwards?”

“Afterwards?”

“When Lehrer is gone?”

“Whatever you want. But…” Noam trailed off, remembering Dara’s pained smile. _What would we do there?_ “I have to stay here. I can't just leave after I promised these people everything but you can go wherever you want. Do whatever you want.”

Dara shook his head. “I can't. I made a deal with Gaia so I have to stay here for half the year.”

“Then you can stay with me. We could rule here together.”

“As kings?”

“As kings. I want you, only you. Forever.”

“What are you asking?” Dara breathed out.

Noam dropped to one knee in a movement so sudden it was jarring. “Marry me.”

Dara’s smile spilled across his face like a sunrise. “Yes.” Then he bent down and he kissed him and kissed him and kissed him until Noam forgot there was anything but him in this world. At one point Dara had gotten him out of his clothes and noam hastily returned the favor, stroking reverently over warm brown skin. Urging him back down. “Oil,” he growled.

“You better have some here.”

“Yes.” He made to pull away but Dara made a dissatisfied noise and pulled him closer again, mouthing at his jaw. “Baby, I have to go get it.”

Dara gave him an imperious look. “Fast.”

“Yes your majesty.”

“Not your majesty yet, Noam.”

Noam grinned over his shoulder as he searched around for the vial of oil. “Give me some time, I’m working on it I promise.” Dara bit his lip but his smile grew around the press of his teeth no matter how hard he tried to hide it. “Found it!”

“Then come here.”

Noam pressed himself up against Dara’s side. “Still bossy,” he said as he slid one of arms under Dara’s head and let the slick fingers of his other hand slowly travel down between Dara’s thighs. “Tell me if something isn't okay.”

“I will, now please do something.” Noam started to carefully open him up, Dara sighing in response.

He moaned when Noam curled his fingers and turned his face away sharply. Noam kissed at his arched neck. “Baby, please don't hide from me.”

He carefully started to press down and Dara groaned softly. “This is embarrassing.”

“There's no sight more beautiful than you drowning in pleasure.”

“Gods, Noam. There’s no need for flattery. I'm already in your bed.”

Noam huffed out a laugh. “Not quite,” he said with a pointed look at the bed on the other side of the room.

“Semantics,” Dara insisted with an airy gesture. “I’m ready.”

“Would you mind if we did a new position?” In the time where everything was still golden and perfect, before Ames’s father, before Lehrer locked Dara away, they had explored each other slowly. It hadn't been enough time, Noam didn't think such a thing existed with Dara. There were parts of each other they didn't get the chance to illuminate yet, some physical most mental and they might never get the chance again. Dara shook his head, curls brushing against Noam’s cheek making him smile. He kissed Dara again and carefully rolled him on his side. Dara moved to roll onto his stomach and get his knees under him but Noam stopped him with a hand on his hip. “No, like this.” He curled around Dara.

“You're warm,” Dara murmured. “And I’m getting impatient.”

Noam pressed a kiss to his shoulder and then reached down to press the head of his cock against Dara’s hole. Dara shifted impatiently, bending one leg to give Noam more acces and gasping when Noam pressed in. He nosed through the curls behind Dara’s hair. “Good?” he asked when his hips were pressed snugly against Dara’s

“Yes,” Dara hissed. “Just go slow.” Noam hummed in assent, slowly stroking over Dara’s stomach, teasing his cock with his oil slick hand. Dara moaned softly while his hips stuttered, torn between pressing himself back on Noam’s cock and into his hand. “Fucking move.”

Noam grinded against him as Dara reached back around Noam’s head to curl fingers into his hair. Noam let go of his cock so he could sweetly cup Dara’s face and coax his face around so he could kiss him like he deserved to be kissed. “What are you waiting for?”

Noam kissed him again and angled his hips in a way that made Dara cry out. “That,” Noam whispered.

“You're such an assho- oh!” 

Noam snapped his hips forward again. “I’m a what?” 

Dara tugged on his hair for revenge. “I want it slow.”

Noam pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Of course, baby.” He started to move again, groaning into the crook of Dara’s neck and grinning against the skin when his name started to leave Dara’s lips over and over.

“Kiss me,” Dara demanded. And Noam did. He kissed and kissed him until his lips were swollen. “Go faster.”

Noam huffed out a laugh. “Fickle.” Dara turned, probably to give him a sharp retort but was distracted by Noam hooking his hand under Dara’s knee and pulling it towards him to hold his legs open. He grinned when Dara got louder. “Just like that. You're so beautiful.” 

“You're talking a lot,” Dara panted.

“Want me to stop?” Dara just bit his lip and reached down to touch himself. “I’ll do that, baby, hold yourself open for me.” Dara’s face turned bright red but he gripped the back of knee so Noam could stroke his cock. “Very good, baby. So good for me. Are you close?”

“Yes. Don't stop.” 

“No problem.” Noam sped up until Dara was writhing and shuddering through an orgasm. He was the most beautiful thing Noam had ever laid eyes on. Noam kept fucking into him until Dara started to shift away. “Too much?”

Dara gave him a hesitant look. “Yeah,” he said softly. 

Noam pressed a kiss to his ear and carefully pulled out. “Can I come on you?”

Dara sighed lazily. “Go for it.” He turned in Noam’s embrace and wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed him hard as Noam started to jerk himself off until he splattered both their stomachs with white, moaning Dara’s name through it.

Dara smiled at him and kissed him again. “Lovely.”

“Really?”

“It’s always lovely with you. You're wonderful.”

“Hmm.” Noam smiled when Dara started to comb his fingers through his hair. “You use that word a lot in regards to me.”

Dara gave him an amused look. “I happen to think it’s very fitting, darling.”

Noam rolled onto his back, careful to keep his arm beneath Dara’s head. “Do you?”

Dara settled his head down on Noam’s shoulder. “Yes. Are we not in agreement on that?”

“You give me more credit than I deserve.”

“I’ll have to convince you otherwise.”

“You're perfect.”

Dara averted his eyes. “Not right now I'm not.”

Noams slowly stroked over the back of Dara’s neck. “You are. Look.” He focused on the sight in front of him. Dara’s straight nose, thick eyelashes and his galaxy of freckles. The redness of his mouth and the mess of his curls, still adorned with flowers. The slightly too sharp cheekbones and the softness of his skin. The way the left corner of his mouth curled up before his right when he smiled, the way his eyes would glint when he said something witty, the way he raised his chin when he was convinced that he was right, the way he scrunched his nose when he was confused, the carefulness with which he treated books, the way he grinned when he grew peonies, the way he said his k’s a little too sharp, the way he softened around children, the glittering of his eyes when he was content, the way Noam was astounded at the wells of love and empathy he discovered within him every day, the way he said _I love you-_

Dara softly touched his bottom lip. “Stop.”

“How?” Noam whispered. 

Dara just blew out a breath and swooped in to kiss him again. “Let’s go to the baths.” Dara stood and helped Noam up. They washed each other slowly, drowsy on the steam of the bath and thet scent of one another. In the soft light this felt more intimate than what they had just done. They didn't bother with clothes when they climbed into bed just curled around each other on the silk. 

“Do you think we’ll live?”

“I don't know. Would you die happy? If we don't make it?”

“No. There's a lot of things I never got to have. And I don't want to die anymore.” Dara laughed. “Just my luck. I live when I want to die and I die when I want to live.” He gave Noam a soft look. “Although I would be content if I died and you lived.”

“Nope, not gonna happen. Sorry, babe,” Noam said with a nonchalant shrug. “You need to show a girl called Bea your crown.”

“I don't have a crown, you'll have to give it to me as an engagement gift.” Dara trailed his long fingers over the curve of Noam’s shoulder. “But I’m afraid that my survival is not for you to decide.”

“Yes it is, king of the dead, remember?” 

Dara smiled, amused at Noam’s near aggressive positivity. “Of course, my apologies, your majesty.”

Noam shifted closer to kiss him. “It’s okay but only because it’s you.”

Dara grinned slowly. “Apple of your eye?”

“Always.”

Dara’s smile slowly fell down. “Are we going to be okay?”

Noam tucked him under his chin. “We have to be, it wouldn't be fair if we were ruined after all this suffering.”

Dara curled up closer. “I want us to be okay.” 

Noam held him tighter and buried his nose in his curls. “I love you,” he whispered. He tried to be kind, sweet even as Dara shook through what might be their last anything, held him close and smoothed his hair as Dara did the same for him. It wouldn't matter tomorrow, something which made it matter so much it burned now.

No matter how much he wished he coulndt stop the sun.

Or Lehrer’s attack.

* * *

Things had started out fine. The death swarmed over the fields like drowsy bees. Waiting.

Dara’s heart beat in his throat, gazing over the desolate surface of the styx. It didn't seem to be moving when he looked at it from this angle. He carded a shaking hand through his hair. Sitting there, waiting for Lehrer’s hand to curl around his neck until his breath froze in his lungs. He tried touching through familiar minds but they were all locked tightly, magic curling securely around them leaving him blind. 

Hecate was sympathetic, trying to distract him with little tricks like making rocks disappear and slowly floating Styx’s water through the air in pretty arches. Styx herself watched it all with a serious face for once. Her lazy eyes were fixed on Dara. Or at least he thought they were fixed on him, he couldn't tell if the pressure on his chest came from her eyes or the fact that Lehrer was coming.

He didn't know what would happen when he died. Technically he was a part of a bigger presence so maybe he would simply return to his homeland. Or would he be resurrected as people still believed in him? Would Lehrer allow that? Dara shuddered at the thought. That would be beyond cruel.

 _Soon,_ Gaia droned.

Dara trembled. “They're close.”

Hecate’s eyes flashed to him. “You sure?”

“Gaia just said ‘soon’”

“Gaia’s soon is different from our soon.”

_Don't make me repeat myself, Priya._

Priya sprung up. “Yes, my lady.” She gave Dara a startled look before raising her hand above her head and shooting off a bright light. Dara could see Ames tense from here as the dead moved more frantically. “Good luck,” she whispered as she took off to hide with Nyx.

Styx sighed and gave him a long look. “Bye little rose. May we meet again, today or in another life.” Then she was gone.

Dara watched the empty sands, waiting for a sign. Lehrer would enter through the main gates, he was too proud to hide and sneak in.

The ground started to hum and Dara could hear the faint sound of a horn and the grind of wheels against the road and Dara squinted at the glow that started to appear in the distance.

Lehrer rode through first and like always the sight of him made Dara utterly useless.

He’d been surprised at the spirits trying to slit his throat but threw them back with a lazy flick of his fingers, eyes never stopping their search.

For Noam.

For Dara.

He twisted around to stare at where his reinforcements were being dragged out of their chariots and off their horses. Dara could almost hear the little irritated hiss of air he let out.

He almost stumbled when a group of overzealous spirits managed to break one of his wheels. One cold look sent them running and he dismounted gracefully. 

Dara took a deep breath and aimed a wave of cold towards his head. The cold climate of the underworld made it easy as did all the times Dara had directed it inwards, turning the temperature lower and lower until his ichor ran through his veins at the lethargic space and he lost the ability to feel Lehrer’s hands sliding over his skin.

Lehrer drew back at the feeling, eyes catching on Dara immediately and he smiled. He didn't pay attention to the ice crystallization over his skin or García’s furious cursing, just to Dara. _Isn't that what you desired, flower? My attention?_

“Styx, out of my way.” Her waters trembled and then slowly dripped away to leave a gash down her middle. He smiled and started to walk towards Dara like he had all the time in the world. He floated onto the river bank, looking down with those dead eyes. “Hello, flower. I will savor this.”

Screaming from the other side distracted him

The fields were swarming with people. Dara could see them clawing at the gods. Desperate pale fingers clawing at eye sockets, curling around ankles, teeth sinking in the fleshy part were shoulder met neck.

Lehrer looked too, frowning slightly at the sight before he focused those burning eyes back on Dara. Desire, Dara had thought when he was young and starved, still willing to bash himself bloody against Lehrer’s cruelty for love, but he knew better now. It was pure, unadulterated hatred. 

Lehrer made an effort to conceal it before, to water it down to disappointment but now the resentment shone bright as polished silver

“Damned child,” he growled, flicking lighting at the few spirits that had been brave enough to approach. They flew through the air, shimmering as they reflected the light and the part of Dara’s brain that wasn't shutting down in terror hoped that they couldn't feel anymore pain. He backed away, tripping in the fine sand of the beaches and falling down. Lehrer didn't seem to have the same problems, approaching as inevitable as death itself with a raised hand and Dara didn't want to die like this and _where the fuck were they-_

Priya appeared behind Lehrer, hitting him with a wicked looking adamant axe at the same time that Nyx shot him with her arrow. 

Lehrer screamed. In surprise or pain or rage Dara didn't know but he had never heard the sound before and he never wanted to again. Lehrer turned around to throw a lightning bolt at Priya but she had already dissolved into mist to reappear at his side and take a swing at his head he barely managed to block. “Die,” he spit out. 

Priya grinned at the command. “Sorry, I’m not going to make it that easy.” 

Lehrer’s face contorted in rage. “Very well.” A stream of flames nearly set her hair on fire and she grit her teeth.

“Dara! Move!” Nyx yelled from the hill she had been stationed on, startling him out of his fear. Lehrer grinned and Dara cursed himself. He knew her position now and shooting him would be trickier. Dara held out his hand to create a swirl of mist to the right of Lehrer to trick him into striking out, giving Priya time to back away again so Claire could take another shot. Lehrer dodged as easily as water. Dara tried to push him off balance with telekinesis but Lehrer immediately made himself heavier, sinking into the sand to withstand the blow. 

This wasn't going to be enough. “Styx!” Dara screamed but she wasn't there, her waters churning wildly near the other side of her river banks. Dara might have underestimated Holloway. He was pulling her away, throwing her water at the spirits around him who screamed in pain as they disintegrated. She had bared her teeth and it was clear that she was having difficulty keeping her river within its bounds and didn't have much energy to worry about the drops that Holloway managed to leach away. 

Drops that proved to be deadlier than his trident. She screeched and he was hit with the realisation that she was the goddess of hatred. In the time it had taken him to recover from the ear piercing sound Priya had stumbled, distracted by Styx or maybe tired or a simple mistake. It didn't matter.

It was enough.

Lehrer took his chance with both hands. He wrapped his long fingers around Priya’s forearm, pulling her forwards so she lost her balance and wrenched her axe from her lax hand before bringing it down in a movement so swift Dara didn't even see him move.

Gold exploded everywhere.

It wasn't the kind of wound you could just walk off.

He could see Priya’s eyes widening in surprise. _Why were they always surprised-_ Lehrer smiled broadly and he took another swing before she had even hit the ground properly, too stunned to teleport away in time. 

Lehrer didn't pay attention to the arrows Claire shot at him, letting them ricochet off his telekinesis in Dara’s direction, who had to dodge. Claire screamed, firing arrow after arrow with every step she ran closer as Lehrer pressed his foot on Priya’s back and wrenched the weapon from her side. She was trying to scramble away, too panicked to use magic as Lehrer raised the axe again.

But this time it wasn't for her.

Claire pulled a knife and turned to ram into Lehrer but he had already moved back and brought the axe down on her shoulder in a neat slice. She gasped and dropped the knife only to cleanly catch it with her other hand midair and turning to cut a deep line over his stomach. He grimaced but brought his hand up to blast her with lighting all the same.

She fell limp to the ground.

Lehrer turned to him with glowing eyes, the corners of his mouth turning up cruelly. “Now, flower, we have all the time in the world.”

* * *

The spirits were not as effective as Noam had hoped. There were many but they were nothing in comparison to the might of a god he realized grimly as García slammed five of them back with a sweep of her spear. An old warrior tried to slam his sword into her back with a cry as she was distracted but she bathed him in flames with a flick of her fingers. The issue wasn't that there weren't enough spirits, it was that there was only a certain amount that could attack at the same time and none of them were strong enough to fight Lehrer’s reinforcements in an effective way. Even with them swarming the fields so thick Noam could barely move through them sometimes. At least Lehrer had crossed the river. Towards Dara. _Gods_. 

So he would have to do it himself. 

He made his way through the confused jumble of spirits, they jumped out of his way the best they could. “Good evening! Fancy seeing you here!” he yelled with a cheeky grin. Her eyes focused on his and the flames dancing through her hair lit up white.

She glared. “You.”

“Me.”

“They should never have allowed mortals to climb to our level, they should have let you be crushed like the bug you are.”

“Not too late for that. Care to take a shot?”

She bared her teeth wildly. “With pleasure.” She attacked, fast as a snake and Noam immediately lost ground. He was a good fighter but it was difficult to fight against centuries of experience. Her spear shot forward and he barely managed to bring his shield up in time. Fuck.

The issue with fighting a warrior with a spear is that their range was much longer than a sword which unfortunately meant that right now it was a lot easier for her to stab him in the face than it was for him to stab her in the face. She struck out again, grinning, _and this wasn't good-_ He wouldn't be able to dodge and withstand her blows forever. He needed a plan.

The next time she brought her spear down he rammed his shield upwards, throwing his weight behind it. The two objects met each other with enough force that her spear splintered through his shield, she jerked forward in surprise and Noam struck his sword forward.

She grunted and flinched back. He had cleaved her side, not a life threatening wound but a nasty one. She looked down at the ichor staining her side for a split second before she attacked again with a scream and so much force that Noam couldn't block her attacks directly anymore, he had to let them slide off his broken shield or redirected them with his sword as she rained down hell. 

This wasn't holdable .

Noam had an idea. A stupid idea but no one gains anything without risks and no one wins anything without sacrifice.

He twisted and García smiled viciously to herself as she struck out and slid her spear neatly through his side, twisting it hard. 

Her smile froze on her face as he returned the favor to her throat.

She fell, choking on her own blood. The spirits swarmed over her immediately, hiding the shocked look in her eyes from view. Noam didn't stay to look at what happened to her, just grit his teeth and pressed his hand over the wound.

He scanned his surroundings, daring a quick look in Dara’s direction. Nyx had left her post and was fighting Lehrer up close. Bad. Lehrer was winning. Worse.

He would have to step in. After he was done annihilating Holloway.

“Fucking bastard,” Noam growled. A wide space had opened up around the god. The dead watching him warily and ducking away whenever he attacked. Noam crouched and slowly made his way closer. As soon as Holloway turned around he pushed forward, holding his shield in front of him and charging recklessly. 

The surprise wore off quickly. Holloway frowned and stabbed at Noam’s legs, forcing him to jump back. They were losing to Lehrer without Styx, she couldn't help because Holloway was distracting her so his only hope was keeping Holloway busy and praying that he couldn't concentrate enough to weaponize her waters at the same time. He swung wildly at Holloway’s head, he could do better than this but he was wounded and getting tired fast, the only trick he got up was striking as hard and fast as possible to overwhelm his opponent.

Yeah, that would work.

Holloway smirked. Good to know they were on the same page. Noam was taken aback by the strength with which Holloway threw himself against his shield.

And the strength with which Ames ran into both of them. “Go!” she said. “I’ll take this.” He nodded in gratitude even though she wasn't watching him anymore, all of her destructive focus on Holloway.

“Styx!” he screamed. “I need you to go to the other side.”

Her face appeared in between the waves, still struggling. “What happened to using the boat?” she gritted out furiously but her waters started to tear apart unsteadily all the same. “Fast.”

Noam bowed quickly and started to sprint down the middle.

PLease let it be in time.

* * *

Lehrer advanced.

Lehrer advanced and like always there wasn't an escape. He could only stumble backwards and backwards and backwards while Lehrer just smiled. Maybe they would dance like this all the way down to tartarus.

Styx was moving wildly, folding up and over herself, frothing in anger. Parting, Dara realized. _But for what?_

“Get away from him,” Noam said low and dangerous.

Lehrer threw a glance over his shoulder. “No, I don't think I will do that.”

Noam stepped forward threateningly. “I’m not asking.”

Lehrer threw his head back and laughed. “You're adorable, but I do suggest taking down whatever clever little trick you've figured out, we can move past this.”

“We can move past this? Past you've done to your people, to your child?”

“Yes, well, I’m in a generous mood. I've spent a lot of time and energy on you, granted I've also done so on Dara but you're slightly less hopeless than him.” Lehrer regarded him with pursed lips and a dismissive tilt of his head. “Whatever needs were fulfilled by him are not very important or finished. Wolf is alive, I don't believe he is something I can use against the Persians, any other skills he possesses that may have pleased me are very, very replaceable, sorry flower but you have to go.”

Noam drew his sword. “How dare you speak to him like that.”

_I have to agree with the boy._

Lehrer froze for a second. “Gaia, dearest grandmother, you have turned against me again.” The ground rose and fell as if shrugging. “You always were very fond of Dara, that’s why you're doing this. He bargained with you.” She stayed silent. Lehrer hummed slowly, eyes flitting around until they rested on Dara. “I would do the same but my respect and worship for you is too great to shame you with the offer of a bargain. I will give you a gift, a sacrifice for you to do as you please. My only child. Forever.”

“Don't listen to him,” Dara gasped.

Lehrer raised his voice. “You can have him, all of him, for as long as you please. And I will look past this little indiscretion against your king.”

 _Will you?_ Gaia didn't sound very impressed but she also wasn't flattening Lehrer like a ball of dough and Dara started to panic. She wasn't invested in killing Lehrer, she was invested in having Dara and up until now the only way to do that was to destroy Lehrer, her former favorite, one of her oldest friends. In her eyes this would be the better deal. The results would be the same, she would have Dara and Lehrer wouldn't hurt him anymore.

“Please,” he whimpered.

_I will let you see the stars._

Dara felt tears of desperation run down his cheeks. “Please.”

There was a long pause where nothing happened. “My offer still stands in the case of you remaining a neutral party, as you prefer. I would also like to remind you of the fact that not even you can beat me. You've tried,” Lehrer said quickly.

She sounded sorry as she said, _See you soon, pebble._

Lehrer sighed through his nose. “Now we can-”

Noam didn't wait for the end of his sentence, he charged. Lightning meandering around his sword, through his hair and eyes. Lehrer was startled and fell forward and for a second Dara had hope.

Then Lehrer’s eyes lit up too with a light much brighter and much more terrible than Noam’s. His hand closed around Noam’s throat. The light illuminating them from within turned more and more viscous until Noam went dull and fell back with steam rising from his body. 

“No!” Dara ran towards where Noam was lying, pale and unmoving. “Noam,” he whispered, trying to press magic into the skin of his cheeks.

Lehrer let out an irritated sigh. “I was going to save that for you but unfortunately I have to make sure I don't break you too badly.” He smiled. “Not too badly, no,” he whispered as the smell of ozone spread through the air.

Dara acted on instinct, delirious with fear and the need to protect Noam, he stretched out his arm towards the bolt of white hot pain curling in the air and closed his fingers around it.

It hurt. It hurt so fucking much but he caught it. Lehrer was too stunned to control his expression and why wouldn't he be? Time after time this had ended in Dara being thrown backwards and pleading for mercy, unable to withstand the sheer power of Lehrer’s lighting but this time was different. Maybe because there was something besides fear and pain motivating him he didn't know but he wasn't backing down this time.

“You-” Lehrer said, face slowly twisting into fury. Then Dara threw the bolt back in his face and the world lit up white. 

It hit.

Dara had hit Lehrer with something. Dara had hurt Lehrer.

The euphoria of the knowledge that he wasn't helpless and Lehrer wasn't invincible was tempered by the fact that Lehrer was alive.

And angry.

Fuck.

“Foolish little boy,” Lehrer hissed between gritted teeth as the air around him started to spark. “You did it all wrong. Allow me to educate you on how to do it.” He pushed himself upward as Dara clutched Noam closer to himself. This was it.

Lehrer was fast but Styx was faster. Slamming into him with the force of centuries of built up hatred and Ames carrying the weapon that had murdered her father. 

Dara stared in disbelief at the heap of soaked limbs that was the person that had ruined his life. Ames stepped out of the wave she had been riding and ran over to kick him as hard as she could. “Fuck you! Fuck you! Fucking bitch!” She stabbed down with the harpe as she kept screaming, voice cracking from fear and exhaustion.

Dara let go of Noam to carefully approach her. “Ames? Ames, he’s done. It’s okay.” 

She looked at him with wild eyes. “Yeah.” She nodded to herself. “Yeah,” she whispered. “We did it.” she laughed and threw her hands up. “I’m awesome,” she yelled at the air. Then she fell into his arms and started sobbing.

“How did you know about the harpe?” Dara asked into the skin of her neck.

“You hid it in your baths, I’m a water goddess, you idiot,” she said between sobs.

“Oh.” Ames laughed at him. “Did you beat the others?”

“Yeah they're done for.”

Dara looked around dazed. Everything felt unreal, like a trap. “We need Bethany here, right now.”

“I will get her,” Styx murmured, clearly unhappy that the ferrying had fallen to her so often. 

“We need- Lehrer needs to be dealt with before he wakes up. Quick!” Ames let go of him to grab one of Lehrers legs but the ground split before she could touch him. 

_Do not worry._

Gaia. Dara didn't know how to feel about her now. “You said you would help me.”

_I did help you. I saved you from Lehrer._

“You were going to let my friends die!”

_Your friends were losing. Badly. I’ve tried to beat Lehrer and the chances of you beating him were small. I cut my losses. I had to._

Dara balled his fists. “You didn't have to do anything.”

 _I don't regret my decision_ , Gaia said eventually. _And this does not change our deal._

Then she took Lehrer away and the ground was calm again.

* * *

Noam was unconscious for a long time. Raphael said he would be fine eventually. That everybody would be fine eventually, even Adalwolf.

Dara didn't know what had happened, he only knew that Wolf was quiet now, withdrawn back in his own head which had turned into a fragile space held together by threads as thin and shimmering as spider silk. “It’s not for you to worry about, you should focus on yourself. On being young,” was the only thing Raphael had said on the matter. “He’s mourning and it will take time.”

He hadn't seen Noam since Raphael and Bethany had declared him well enough to travel back to the underworld. “I’ll look after Bea.” Noam had pressed a string of black crystals in his hand. “Remember what I asked you.”

Dara had kissed him hard. “Remember I said yes.”

Olympus was chaotic for a long time, persuasion had been broken but Lehrer had never needed it to get support. Every day there were skirmishes and people being swallowed by Gaia but Dara stayed away from it as much as possible. 

People wanted Adalwolf to take his rightful place when things had calmed down. Wolf had gagged when he heard that. “Yeah, that's going to turn out great. They should give it to Raph. He's the one that actually thinks about decisions.” 

Taye had stepped in eventually to avoid anyone that still supported Lehrer to take power and Ames had inherited her fathers old kingdom. She didn't like it but it kept her busy and gave her power so she wasn't too mad.

It was odd, not having a lot to do. Not being afraid. Dara spent his days wandering around, counting stars, trailing flowers in his wake and reluctantly eating more. It had been a calm six months.

He was indulging some nymphs in casual conversation, stopping to pick a flower every once in a while when a twisted tree with a pitch black bark, weighted down with blood red fruit caught his eye. The crystals around his wrist heated up.

Pomegranates.

He smiled to himself and ran towards it, plucking the first fruit he saw and ripping it in two before sinking his teeth into the seeds.

The ground cracked and one of the nymphs screamed as a dark figure rose from the ground. Dara didn't move as strong hands caught his middle and he was pulled against a warm body into the darkness. He didn't pay any mind to the muffled cries of the creatures above or the dropping temperature. 

“Hello,” Noam said softly.

“Hello tall dark stranger,” Dara smiled. “Did you need something from me?”

Noam tilted his head, considering. “Well, I was told that you need to keep your end of a deal with lady Gaia.”

“What does that mean?”

Noam gripped him a little tighter. “It means that you’ll have to stay here for the next six months.”

“Six months is long,” Dara murmured, trailing his stained fingers over Noam’s cheekbone. “How will I pass all that time?”

Noam bent forward. “I will help.” Dara couldn't hold in his laughter anymore and he hugged Noam close.

“I missed you,” he whispered before kissing him. Noam kissed back eagerly and for a while that’s all they did, hard kisses and gentle hands.

“I have so much to show you,” Noam said as he finally pulled away, excitement alight in his eyes, smile coloured red. “So much has changed, it’s no longer just darkness now. There’s life too.”

“Show me.”

Noam grinned. “I love you.”

“I love you too. More than anything.”

“For eternity,” Noam said, still smiling so broadly it must have been starting to hurt.

Dara intertwined their hands. “Together.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This did not want to be written at all and parts of it still chafe a little but I'm happy with it and hope y'all are too! I want to than Everybody that commented on my fic but especially to AwkwardJello and spicedpiano because they were here either every or nearly every chapter and that was honestly such an encouragement! So thank you!
> 
> Gaia did fight Zeus (she has kinda a habit of weaponising children) she lost.
> 
> Anyway happily ever after! They get married eventually and adopt Bea!


End file.
